Why is Mental Health still Taboo to discuss?

[Patty Smyth]

and we have to 'play' in their world.....i.e. if they are in the 50ies, we have to remind ourself...they don't know who we are....and if we look like their mom, sister, etc....they might talk to us using one of their other relative first name ....people taking care of someone with Alzheimer must be people who know the person's life , family, back ground....etc...
thumb up to you Patty for being able to do this for your mom

Yes sometimes my mom thinks I am her sister, Mother, peer, nurse, stranger. You never know what you are going to get but just try to play along.

[lecale]

It is so tough when someone you love is not altogether there.

We made good friends with a neighbour that was on a LOT of morphine due to a back condition that they could not surgically correct. If you saw this fellow move about, your first thought would be oh my gosh please don't fall! He was so fragile.

dh and I were at home with health issues and though our friend had a lot of family he was alone 8:00AM-8:00PM, so we told him the door was always open and he dropped by every day.

He was great to chat to but the morphine...wow, could he ever go from sense to senseless. From time to time he would burble about things that could not possibly be true though he presented as if he was normal. When he slid off track I found myself going into interrogation mode: what? huh? How is that? But you had said...and I am sure there are no agents or conspiracy or other fantastical things!

I don't think I was being the most helpful person as it is a real affront to someone's dignity to prove to them that they are talking crazy. And it was just the meds that was doing this to him. And he knew it and it did not make him happy.

I think there must be some primal urge to smack sense into someone because it seems to me if you haven't been there, it cannot be understood.

dh had been on morphine a few times and he had told me I don't want you anywhere NEAR the hospital when I am on this stuff. (He describes himself as a "regular blue collar kinda guy". Giddy and uninhibited on morphine, they had him rooming with a pastor in the hospital who was in tears trying not to laugh at things that should have never hit a preacher's ears.)

But dh "got it" and he had the most beautiful solution when our friend stopped making sense: he broke into a broad grin and broke out into song. He'd sing a barroom song or Hippopotamus for Xmas or anything with an element of glee to it.

It was such a gentle way of letting our friend know his mind was slipping, and our friend was able to sit back and smile and be in a haze for a moment without feeling that he was being a nutter, again.

We sang a whole lot of songs before our friend left us that fall. It is something that I remember fondly: taking the worst effects of his treatment and turning them into happy moments and memories.

[Lynn49]

Yes sometimes my mom thinks I am her sister, Mother, peer, nurse, stranger. You never know what you are going to get but just try to play along.

Oh, Patty, I remember those days...I may have been her sister, one of her best friends from many years ago, and only sometimes her daughter. It's funny, though...she always seemed to light up when our Daughter visited with her...they were so close and shared the same wicked sense of humour...strange, isn't it?

I know what you're going through is tough, but as tough as it is, I can look back now without any regrets about how I cared for her....All the best...Lynn

[TudorChick]

im always listening to uk top 40,because the music is usually upbeat,but i heard this song repetitively,and grew to like it..and it kinda relates to me..

in a way i chose not to do drugs anymore for depression and i like how it feels....i know the song isnt about that but to me i made it mine and now it is my song i play when i am down..it lifts me up...thought i'd share...

[Rika]

My thanks to everyone .... I dont feel alone anymore

[greentires4me]

I was online the other night on a chatroom program I frequent and noticed as I said I had Major Depression and Conversion Disorders the moderator I get this note from them to be "more positive in the room please" in big bolded letters. I thought to myself now hey not everyone is going to be positive 24/7 here as people were asking me questions the PM note still stood out in my mind. I told them frankly I was going to take my conversation elsewhere and thats what I did I left the room and said I was going to take my chit chat elsewhere because I was not wanted there.

Its starting to show that people are less talkative about peoples real problems and more sugar coating things even on this chat site that I frequent...

After having that experience I wonder has anyone else on here had that too...?

[Skippy]

I am in such pain and although the doseage was increased so has the pain! Spring has been the worst ever, especially with dampness.
I haven't been on here because I've retreated back into my own cave. To deal with my own physical and mental health, and also what I physically need to do in the non-virtual world. Things that need to be done are taking longer, and I need to do them. Pain has also brought out the worst in me, and so I need to deal with that too. I'm sorry for unanswered PM's or other messages, and for missing out with those that need help. I know there are many good people here who care for others, and will fill the void.
Thank you my friends, I remember you often.

[Natalka]

Skippy, I've been thinking about you, too - but hoping you were too busy to be on here!
Sorry to learn things aren't going well for you; praying that things soon improve...

[Skippy]

Next week I'm going to a psychiatrist. What should I expect? Would anyone care to share? Feel free to PM if more comfortable.

[lecale]

What should I expect since I'm seeing one next week? Would anyone care to share?

Nothing scary, Skippy!

Your first appointment, come a bit early as it is common to have to fill out a new patient profile and some places will have you do a mood inventory questionnaire just to see where you're at.

The first time around you will be going over your history - what brought you there. It should be a pretty easy appointment.

Your doctors approach will be either medication centered or talk therapy centered.

If you get a medication-centric doctor, after your history most of your appointments will be < 1/2 hr and the focus will be on symptoms, side effects, raising and lowering doses. Doctors with this focus don't spend a lot of time listening to you go on about your life. This type of doctor is more suited to someone with a long standing problem that needs to go in for drug tune-ups. I doubt your doctor would refer you to one given your situation but if you accidentally end up in the wrong place, don't be scared to tell your GP that you need a different referral.

If you get a therapy-centric doctor, they also prescribe drugs, but you will spend a lot of time talking about your issues, and a good doc will ask you lots of questions to get you thinking about your situation. I think we need the prodding because you can go on and on in your own thinking and if the doctor just sits there listening...you may not be able to move forward. If you come away feeling it was more of a monologue than a conversation, you might not have the right fit. Appointments don't run a full hour as the doc needs time to make notes: plan on 45-50 minutes.

The important thing to remember about therapy is to give yourself a break. It's hard to talk about things that trouble you and that might mean a sleepless night before your appointment as you go over things in your head, and talking about all this stuff can be really draining afterwards as well. If you put too much pressure on yourself...with all sorts of things to do in the same day as your appointment...your head is going to explode. If you really dig deep in therapy, give yourself the rest of the day off.

When you come home all sorts of stuff will be stirred up your mind. Honestly, that means your spouse is "in therapy" as well as when you that dredge stuff up, you'll have trouble leaving it alone. Your SO needs to understand that you are going to be stirred up around the day of your appointment. Plan time to talk and make it an easy dinner with takeout or a frozen pizza. It helps to rehash things with your SO, but it makes for an exhausting day.

I have to say, looking after Skippy is a long overdue task. I don't think I know anyone else that is stretched so thin. Wishing you continued strength, a positive visit and a doc you can click with!

[Speckled28]

What should I expect since I'm seeing one next week? Would anyone care to share?

Skippy, I went back a few pages but couldn't figure out who you're seeing next week? Maybe you could clarify?


N.M.....I get it! I had just read that you hurt your shoulder as well so I wasn't sure what kind of appointment we were talking about. I saw someone for about 2 years.........who I didn't find especially helpful. Don't get me wrong she was extremely nice and understanding......but that was about the extent of it. I know several people who have had extremely good results though and absolutely love their doctor. Best of luck!

[Skippy]

I go and see a professional,please remember me in prayer and thought.
Lastly, in a province like Ontario, I find it mind boggling that the system is in such a disarray.