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Thread: Feeling used :(

  1. #16
    Senior Canuck
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    That's why I don't have many friends cause I'm "useless", lol. Just kidding, I don't like this whole idea of getting friends involved when doing project around house. I'd ask for advice, but things could turn sour very quick. I totally get how you feel, if you say no, they would be upset, but if you give them a price that doesn't satisfy them, they'd be upset too, either way, it's lose lose situation.

  2. #17
    Senior Canuck Speckled28's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mommymonika View Post
    That sucks. My DH is an electrician so we get the same thing. He doesn't mind helping a friend out here or there, but it really bothers him when people try to take advantage.

    The worst is when he does give a friend a deal and then they tell a friend of theirs (who we don't know) to call him cause he'll give them a great deal. Very frustrating.
    My dad used to get that kinda of thing all the time......he did auto body work. He'd do work for friends and family on the side....at a lower price....but either people he barely knew would start popping up or people would expect him to do the work JUST for the cost of parts/paint etc......no labor. He was happy to discount it but not do it for FREE! lol. And I always think that business between friends and family is a really grey area........usually things work great but it only takes one thing to go wrong to create a huge issue.

  3. #18
    Clearance Junkie Ami1984's Avatar
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    I don't thin you are over reacting at all, this si actually mean in my opinion, Now if they said I need your opinion on this and lets have dinner it would be ok, but to let you be blind sided bye it is not so nice at all

  4. #19
    One Awesome Domestic Diva MrsSunshine's Avatar
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    that does suck.... business should be totally seperate from family.. at least when it comes to dinner..
    so ya charge em 3x what you charge everybody else.. done deal.. can ya do that? lol
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    Axiomatic Canuck Tbites's Avatar
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  6. #21
    Canadian Genius Tweetybird999's Avatar
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    I hate it when people try that. If they really want some of my advice I make them come see me at my office during business hours. I won't get into it at parties/dinners/bbq, etc. People even try to get DH to ask me stuff for them. He won't do it and just gives them my card. Ironic the only person who asked DH to set up an app't with me didn't tell him the problem and just came to my office for help.

    I also had an odd feeling once when a co-worker suddenly phoned me and asked DH and I to come over for dinner. I outright asked if they were selling something. She said yes and proceeded to justify why we should come and hear all about it. We did not go.

    So you might want to ask these people if they want to talk about any business during dinner before you agree.
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  7. #22
    Senior Canuck emmafb's Avatar
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    I would have just stop them right there. Telling them nicely that it had been a long week & you are pretty tired. Then tell them you have everything at work that can better help me evaluating / calculating the cost. Ask them to come by during the week when you are at work to discuss it.
    flyingdutch likes this.

  8. #23
    Smart Canuck glowworm2k's Avatar
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    We go through this a lot, too. DH is an auto technician, and everybody and their dog expects advice, free/discounted work, or even to borrow DH's tools (this pisses him off the worst as so many "borrowers" have sticky fingers). DH is very laid back, but it bothers him all the same. What he ends up doing most of the time is pointing out that all his tools stay at work and that he's very busy, but he would be happy to have whoever bring their car by his work (an auto dealership) and asking that he specifically look after it. This works well to separate those looking who are interested in his skills from those looking for a bargain.
    flyingdutch likes this.

  9. #24
    Couponista ArmyWifeEdmonton's Avatar
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    Invite them over for dinner and then ask them to babysit your kids. Same idea! Plain rude!

  10. #25
    The ONLY Diva of SC! saveadollardiva's Avatar
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    Poor you! I know how that feels. When my DH and I go to my sides places for dinners I am usually the one helping bring out the food, help cook, putting out plates, serving food etc. Like I am a guest and yes I am family and family helps out...BUT it's bad when you family memebers know your the go to person when it comes to helping out! Like I am not even through the front door and I have a family member saying "Thank God your here can you do this and this!" and no one else in my family helps! MY DH get's mad because he see's me doing everything when I should be relaxing lol. I have decided the next family meal i am not going to do anything and enjoy myself! And If I were you I would have called them on it and said "Hey we were looking forward to a nice dinner with you guys as friends, not to talk business." and I would have left.
    Last edited by saveadollardiva; Fri, Apr 13th, 2012 at 09:51 AM.


  11. #26
    Smart Canuck SavenRaven's Avatar
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    Grrr. How Rude! If they wanted to talk business then they should have scheduled a consultation meeting with you during business hours, not invite you over for a family dinner. Some people just don't get it.

    I feel your frustration on this one. I am an Accountant and all kinds of "friends" come out of the woods each year during Tax season. I actually had to update my facebook status this year saying that I don't do income taxes! I came home once and found my mailbox stuffed with an envelope of T4's and receipts with a note attached telling me to call that person when their taxes were done! I hadn't talked to this person in over a year and really had to hold back from putting whole envelope through the shredder.... instead I just mailed it back to them. Point taken.

  12. #27
    Smart Canuck SavenRaven's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArmyWifeEdmonton View Post
    Invite them over for dinner and then ask them to babysit your kids. Same idea! Plain rude!

    Bah ha haa! Love it!

  13. #28
    Canadian Genius CouponLadybird's Avatar
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    DH runs into that all the time too.....it is unbelievably frustrating. We've decided to go with "we're here to visit you during our off time, if you want to talk about work, please call during business hours" usually stops people in their tracks. Some see it as rude, but most (after some thought) understand.

  14. #29
    Smart Canuck flyingdutch's Avatar
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    I'm sorry that your nice friendly dinner didn't turn out how you wanted it to. It's kinda sneaky for them to ask you that way... I'm all for trying to help friends out and all... but they could DEFINATELY have discussed it with you in a better way... i.e. talking with your guys at your office and (in my opinion) the tactful thing for them to have done would be to give you their business (since your friends and friends help friends like that, plus you almost always get better service from people you know and trust) BUT let YOU decide if you can give them a "friends/family" price or not, you are afterall running a business that you need to support your family. To expect you to just offer up a discounted price is just plain RUDE!

  15. #30
    Member of rep ho-ing club kelly25's Avatar
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    So its clear I’m not overreacting then. On a good note, my guard is now up and for future invites I will be directly asking what the intentions are. Honestly I don’t mind but during business hours on the weekdays and NOT my Saturday night with my children. Feels good to receive all this support here on SC. Thank you
    Eva-M and Darth Penguin like this.

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