My boss is playin me like a fiddle. I don't wanna be a fiddle, I wanna promotion!

[Brooke_]

I've been working at my current job for a little over a year now. I do well, I provide great customer service and really do my best to go above and beyond. I am a pleasure to work with...most of the time! Everyone has their days. End of January I told my boss I wanted to take some time off and travel, maybe two months. She replied with "how am I going to promote you if you go away?'". Ohh, okay it's like that huh..well it worked. I didn't think one more second about going away, I just focused on doing my best and showing the initiative to get the promotion. We agreed to sit down and talk at the end of February and make a plan. Well we finally just talked about things about two weeks ago. My boss told me she enrolled me in the training and we will set times where I am scheduled to do my training and not to be bothered with other work. However this is not a priority for anyone therefore I have not been given any time to train and it seems like it isn't on anyone's mine except mine! I am so frustrated, like give me a chance here! I need some support. It is bad enough my coworkers at my level don't support me and try and bring me down with negative comments such as "I really don't think it is a good idea for you to be training when you are still in this roll" oh just shut it! It has nothing to do with you! Smile and nod, just smile and nod.
Anyways, my sister invited me to the Christening of her children which will be in London, England in August. I asked for the vacation agenda, saw that no body else had booked it off, and marked in my holidays. One week in London and two weeks in Dubai. I am so excited, if work isn't pulling through with it's promises at least I can look forward to an amazing holiday with my nieces and nephew (they live in Dubai).
Well my ever supporting coworker, who I love dearly (smiling and nodding as we speak ) informs me today that she already has those dates booked off as she will be getting married at that time. But it wasn't in the vacation agenda? We ask our assistant manager when she gets in and she made a mistake and forgot to mark the days my coworker booked off. SERIOUSLY!!
So, not only have I been wanting to travel for months, but put it off due to false promises of a promotion, but now I can't go to my niece's and nephew's Christening because my coworkers is getting married? No she isn't! She is dating a married man currently and although their business is none of mine I can't help but be upset! Her boyfriend is currently married and his wife isn't cooperating with the divorce. To make it worse they're Christian people, he is actually a priest who travels around spreading the gospel word. I have nothing against this religion, and myself am a Christian but I am so mad I can't help but point out all the flaws in their little scheme. I do not judge them, I am simply angry that this coworker manages to drive us all nuts every day and now this! The cherry on top. I have regular clients at my work who honestly, they call and ask if she is working before they come in because they will come at a time when she isn't working, that is how crazy she drives everyone!
Anyways, what are you thoughts as to my plan of attack. I was thinking I would book my holidays anyways, since it is in August. By that time if I am still in my position I will just quit. Realistically, I should be in a different position at my work by that time which means me and my coworker taking holidays at the same time wouldn't matter, since we have different roles.
GRRRR, thanks for listening I feel much better now. Kind of.

[sun_shine]

I would say to book it anyway; as you said, it's in August and a lot can happen between now and then.

As for your manager, I would say either deal with it for now (or report to a higher-up if possible) if this is a job that you really think you see yourself working longterm. I saw a supervisor at my former job at Tim Horton's go through this with our manager. The supervisor had to book time off for a medical procedure (a necessary one, not elective) and the manager said to her "we are supposed to have our first aid training on that day. This sure doesn't show me that you really want to be a manager some day". This was one of those medical appointments where one comes up every few months so when it's available you have to take it! I was disgusted that the manager would say something like that to a staff who had a valid reason to miss a day. However, this supervisor actually had being a manager at Tim Horton's as her main career goal, so she stuck through it and is now a manager.

I guess what I'm trying to say, is if you really want this job and can't talk with an hr rep or somebody above your manager, you just continue to do your best and strive for that promotion. If you could find another/a better job and don't care that much about your current one start looking for a way out. Personally, no amount of money would be enough for me to be 'played' by a manager!

[lghend]

Oh I so feel for you! I would suggest asking your boss for a meeting "this week", set a date and time (make it official). That gives her time to think "oh oh" and I'm sure she knows exactly what's coming. When you meet, tell her that this is not working and you need an absolute schedule for your training as you want to be finished by "insert date". All the while smiling but being firm. As for holidays, let her know that while the timing isn't perfect, it IS your family and it's not something that can be changed. "Pained expression mixed with sympathy...for HER." As you probably know by now, this will keep happening until you push back (gently).

[Shwa Girl]

OP, I do not know your field, your credentials or your age.
Promotion after one year? That would be exciting. And fast.
You mentioned 2 months vacation. Then you have reduced to 3 weeks vacation.
I am wondering, only thinking like the boss, if you are dedicated to the position. I am wondering, only thinking like the boss, if, after a promotion, you would take a month off here and a month off there, especially when it is busy or short staffed or there is an "emergency".

I am just thinking like your boss. So you can see what goes through your boss' mind. Right or wrong
I hope all works out well for you.

[torontogal12]

Why didn't you just tell them that you had already booked it and if they had forgotten to mark it off in the calendar, too bad. Their fault for not marking things off... If you value this job (can' t tell, but I'm guessing you're kind of over it), it is worth getting HR involved.

[Shwa Girl]

I saw a supervisor at my former job at Tim Horton's go through this with our manager. The supervisor had to book time off for a medical procedure (a necessary one, not elective) and the manager said to her "we are supposed to have our first aid training on that day. This sure doesn't show me that you really want to be a manager some day". This was one of those medical appointments where one comes up every few months so when it's available you have to take it! I was disgusted that the manager would say something like that to a staff who had a valid reason to miss a day. However, this supervisor actually had being a manager at Tim Horton's as her main career goal, so she stuck through it and is now a manager.

I think that bosses do this because, in the current economy, they can get away with it. They know that there are unemployed people who would jump at this job. It's sad but true.

[lecale]

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