Attending birthday parties for twins-WWYD?

[Lyssia510]

My dd was invited to a birthday party this weekend for twins(turning11). Only 1 of the girls is in her class dd is pretty good friends with her, the other one has been in her class previously but dd doesn't really care for her.
Would you buy gifts for both kids or just the one in dd class? I usually spend 20-30 on a gift for school birthday parties(one of my pet peeves is getting bags of crap from the dollar that you end up tossing out so I try to get something useful) so that's getting expensive for kids she doesn't hang out with outside of school. But at the same time I don't feel right just getting one kid a present since the party is for both.
Was debating on getting them both gift cards to somewhere, but I'm not sure if that's tacky and seems thoughtless.

[Zonny]

I would buy for the kid that your DD is friends with. If she was close with both of them, sure get them both a gift, but in this case, I say just the one. Gift cards aren't tacky IMO, I think most kids would love that - mine sure would.

I normally cap spending at $15 - $20. I don't buy dollar store stuff, but it really gets expensive if your child gets invited to a lot of them.

[bargain_hunter_lola]

Personally I'd get both girls a gift. Perhaps spending a little bit less on each gift since you're buying 2.

DD has gotten gift cards before and I haven't minded, it's nice for kids to pick out a gift by themselves - although I always seem to end up putting money into it since she's 5 and doesn't understand taxes etc. 11 year olds should though.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

[Minou]

Yeah, $20-$30 seems like a lot. I think you should buy for both, as they're both girls. A $15 gift each. If it were a party for boy/girl twins, I think you might be excused from buying for the boy if only the girl was the classmate and friend, as the boy would likely have a different friend group.

I kind of think that parents of twins of that age should send out invites for "Twin 1's birthday" to "Twin 1's friends" if they have different friend groups rather than issuing a joint invitation, even if the parties ARE combined. I think it would prevent other parents from feeling obligated to buy two gifts, which is a big expectation.

Not looking forward to my son starting to go to birthday parties when he's in kindergarten. I can't imagine paying more than $15 for a gift for anyone but a really close friend of his. I'll have to look for clearance sales and stock the gift cupboard for sure!

[Insane]

In the past we've bought gifts for both twins. I wouldn't be comfortable not giving each twin a present. Imagine if everyone else did and you didn't, and so that 2nd twin got less? I don't know, I couldn't be able to do it. I have to say though that when the twins come to my daughter's party (she invites both with separate invitations) they do bring separate gifts.

Now that they are older, their mom holds separate parties for them (they are boy/girl twins). My daughter only goes to the girl's party now. Their mom has always been very good at making sure they are seen as 2 different people (I guess that's easier when you are boy/girl).

I buy presents that are $20 each or so.

[Lyssia510]

Thanks for the options everyone! I think I'm just gonna get both girls a small 10-15 gift, now just to figure out what to get them, their dad wasn't much help when I asked him lol

[Frugalbigmama]

You are a smartcanuck! You spend $10 but it looks like you spent $35

[Frugalbigmama]

I loved when my son gets b-day invites. I shop the deals and have something ready. I just recently sold tons of new gifts for girls as they were for when he was younger and I am making $ on them since I got them for cheap

[Lyssia510]

I loved when my son gets b-day invites. I shop the deals and have something ready. I just recently sold tons of new gifts for girls as they were for when he was younger and I am making $ on them since I got them for cheap

I used to do that when dd was younger, but when they get too old for toys it gets harder to stock pile gifts.

[Zonny]

I loved when my son gets b-day invites. I shop the deals and have something ready. I just recently sold tons of new gifts for girls as they were for when he was younger and I am making $ on them since I got them for cheap

I used to do that when dd was younger, but when they get too old for toys it gets harder to stock pile gifts.

I do this too, not tons of stuff but when I see things on sale I do sometimes pick them up. I have a few things in my stockpile right now that probably need to go, as they're too young for his friends now.

[Himalaio]

I'd get them both a gift. Or, considering there's two of them, maybe buy something for two, like a game they can play together, a sports set for two, a board game? I can't think of an example but you know what I mean

[Midnightly]

i agree this is a tricky thing.. your child was probably invited by 1 of the girls not both of them but because it's a joint birthday party the invite is from both... a part of me agrees with Minu, that even though it's the same party have two sets of invites a twin 1 and twin 2..

i do gotta ask the flip side question though... when your child has a birthday party do you feel the need to have to invite both twins to a party so one doesn't get left out (and do both bring separate gifts or 1 gift with a value of two seperate)

you could always buy each of them a movie ticket (that way they each get something and it's fairly affordable)

[Minou]

I guess a person could stock up on cool gift baskets or Bath and Body Works or the Body Shop stuff for 11-14 year old girls. Find the clearance sales. Could also buy some good nailpolish and implements, etc. on sale. Cosmetic bag? Tinted lip gloss? Girls of that age tend to like anything makeuppy. Could also buy some YA fiction from Bookoutlet for gifts. You could buy a few books and look like you spent a lot. Could buy stuff at Shoppers with points, too, or wait for the "two free movie tickets when you spend $75 events" and pick up some candy to go with it. A few teen magazines would be pretty cool as well.