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Thread: At what age do your kids walk to school alone?

  1. #1
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    I *think* this may have been discussed before, but not sure.

    Our DS is eight, and in grade 3. DH and I both leave for work before 7:30 and get home around 4:45, school starts at 8:50, gets out at 3:10. Since he started school DS has gone to a sitter in the morning and a different one after school.

    Since he started grade 3 he's in a different school now, one that goes from 3-6. Our morning sitter had a surgery early in the year and so wasn't able to take him the first few days, so I went to work late and walked him to school.

    I've seen a fair bit of this in his grade primary - 2 school, parents that drop off their kids and drive away before the 'duty bell' (when a teacher comes out to supervise the playground). There seems to be a lot more of this in the new school that starts in grade 3. One of the days I dropped him off, I counted 16 kids in the playground before the duty bell, most if not all of of them under grade 4 from what I could see. I was the only adult present.

    Fortunately DS doesn't seem to mind that he has someone (me or the sitter) walk him to school, isn't embarrassed about it or anything. Good thing, since i figure I'll let him start walking to school alone when he's maybe 20.

    The school is not far, only about ten minutes walk away. DS would not have to cross major streets to get to it; since we don't have a car, he's pretty street-smart anyhow and does pretty well at knowing you have to look before you cross, etc. I DON'T think he's ready to do it on his own and we won't be doing that this year . The least issue is that he wouldn't get out the door on time if someone wasn't pushing him, or that he wouldn't be trusted to lock the door. Aside from that, while he's a very big kid (5 feet tall and 100 pounds), he's EIGHT! I was home today, and saw a nine year old friend of his walking past on his way home, which he apparently does each day, to and from school, walks alone. His parents don't get home until 5. I'm a bit boggled by this.

    What do you all think? How young is too young? Does it make a difference if they're with a friend? Am I being way too overprotective? (was kidding about the age 20 bit in case you didn't see that). The kids in our area walk on a sidewalk, but it's along a very busy residential street that we live on.
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  2. #2
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    We walked our daughter to school ( 8 minute walk) until the end of grade 4-we started to leave her home alone for 1/2 an hr at age 10. When you have a group of children walking together younger is likely fine. Every neighbourhood and child is different but I would not leave an 8-9 year old home alone.
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  3. #3
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    At 9 to 10 if the child is ready, can definitely walk four to six blocks on his own.

    Not to stay home alone, though - no, not even for a half hour - til 12 years old - in my opinion.

    The years of 9-10-11-12 make a very big difference in the maturity of a child.
    We may think they will obey, be mature, have all the talks about safety and think they will not do anything 'stupid' without us there, but you know - sometimes they just will...

    I realize it's difficult with working parents, but a child's safety is much more important than any dollars it would take to have a sitter or a neighbour help out in the morning and after school.
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  4. #4
    no more door to door! :) walkonby's Avatar
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    No issues with our three kids as the school was directly across the street from our house. ( spoiled! )
    However, since we both worked, DH walked the 3 over every morning, I picked them up after school. My eldest was in grade 2 when the last sibling came along......and it became the routine with their Dad all heading out together. I cannot remember any of them complaining about walking to and from with either of us.
    I agree with Natalka though, each child is different in maturity levels. What works well for one family is risky and nerve-wracking for another. Mine were NEVER left here alone. It was just our policy.
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    Every child is different. My oldest is more responsible than some adults (lol) so she would've been able to manage that. My youngest? She STILL can't walk in a parking lot without nearly getting run over by cars because she just doesn't stop and look. She charges on through. She's almost 9 years old so she really ought to know better by now!!!

    We have girls, which, as sexist as this is going to sound, makes a difference in our eagerness to let them do things alone. We are more hesitant because they are girls even though I suspect they are calmer and more rational and less likely to get in trouble than boys of their same age. DH likes to brag about how when he was a boy he would ride his bike to the nearest town (5+ km away) by the time he was 9. When our daughter was 10 we told her she could ride to the library alone (7 min bike ride). She still waited nearly a full year before she took advantage of that freedom. Seems we weren't ready and neither was she.

    I think given the younger age, I would lean more toward a group of kids walking together rather than alone, but that's just me. And who knows...he might not feel ready anyway!

    When I was a kid, I got off the bus in a rural area at 9 years old, let myself in the house, and stayed til my folks came home at 5. That's just how it was. There was no day care available and no after school program or any of those things out in the country and although times are changing with full-day kindergarten and all that, those services are still lacking in the rural parts. I dunno; maybe it's just a rural area thing to let your kids be more independent sooner because you really have no other choice?? Anyone from a rural area want to chip in?
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    I think it honestly depends on the child, not the actual age. My dd started walking to school alone(8-10 min walk) last winter at 10 1/2. I would have let her walk to school alone before that but she didn't feel ready. I have friends who's kids were doing a 20 min walk to school by themselves, in the middle of the city crossing busy streets and staying home alone before an after school for a bit at 8, and they were mature enough to handle that.
    I also think with the internet/news and social media being so accessible these days, it scares us from letting our kids do things that our parents probably never thought twice about letting us do(I was walking home from school by myself at 6, and was responsible for taking the neighbourhood kids to and from school at 8, riding my bike to parks 20 mins away by myself at 9, outside playing from the time I got home from school until bedtime every night, even when it was dark, I would never let my dd do half the things we were allowed to do growing up). My first thought whenever dd asks if she can go play with her friends is "what if she gets kidnapped on the way there or home?" And if she's a minute or two late coming home, I'm imagining every worst case scenario until she walks through the door. I try to remind myself that every danger that I fear happening to her was around when I was young too, it just wasn't as in your face as it is now.
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    It depends, of course, on the child’s maturity and temperament, the distance to school and amount of traffic. But generally around age 9, children are less impulsive, more attentive and have the cognitive ability needed to cross a street safely.
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