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Thread: 5 yo boy charged 15.95 UKP for party non-attendance.

  1. #1
    Sith Lady and Cool Kid Darth Penguin's Avatar
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    A five-year-old was billed for failing to attend a friend's birthday party - resulting in threats of legal action.
    Alex Nash, from Cornwall, was invited to the party just before Christmas.
    An invoice for £15.95 was sent by his schoolfriend's mother Julie Lawrence, who said Alex's non-attendance left her out of pocket and his parents had her details to tell her he was not going.
    Alex's father Derek said he had been told he would be taken to the small claims court for refusing to pay.
    Alex's parents, from Torpoint, had accepted an invitation to the party at a dry ski slope in Plymouth, Devon, just before Christmas.
    However, they realised their son was double-booked and due to spend time with his grandparents, which he did.
    Story here
    This thread is currently associated with: N/A
    Lynn49 and thriftygranny like this.


    Short answer : no Long answer : NOOOOOOOOOOO!

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    I know several of us had talked about people not responding to invites in the All-purpose rant thread.. but would any-one consider charging a guest who initially accepted and then didn't turn up ...
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    Let a lesson be learned..





    After the story made headlines this morning, a Facebook conversation has emerged in which Ms Lawrence explains her actions.
    It begins with Tanya asking about what happened - below are some extracts form the lengthy chat.
    She wrote: "I was very shocked to see the invoice in Alex's school bag. I did not realise that you had to pay for each child, as you never mentioned anything about money when we spoke....
    "I apologise for not letting you know, but I did not have a phone number or an e-mail for you to let you know the situation (I also didn't know your first name, or I would have looked you up).
    "If I had known that I would have to pay if Alex did not go, then I would have paid you the money, no problem. I do not like fighting with people, and would prefer to settle this amicably."
    Julie replied: "I didn't mention the money when we spoke because it was a child's party, it doesn't matter if you have to pay per person or for a group if people agree to going.
    "I confirmed that with all parents on the Thursday before the party that they were going as I had to pay that day, and Derek told me Alex was looking forward to it and would see us there, to me that is confirmation.
    "My phone number was on the invitation that was sent out to Alex...
    "This is not the first time Alex has not turned up to a party that he has been invited to, either. The amicable way round this I believe would be to pay me the money and let a lesson be learnt, I hope this is agreeable ?"
    But Alex's mum was not pleased with the response, explaining that she wasn't aware of another party he hadn't turned up to. She added that the school wasn't happy that the envelope had been placed in her son's bag.

    Last edited by Darth Penguin; Mon, Jan 19th, 2015 at 07:38 PM. Reason: tidy quote
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    I saw this yesterday morning on the news. While i understand the frustration of the mom hosting the party (due to the fact no one seems to think rsvp's are important anymore) I think she took it too far.

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    lol Crazy.

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    I can definitely understand that the mom is angry that the boy didn't show up without any notice but charging him THIS WAY is just ridiculous.

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    I saw this months ago and found it interesting.

    I would never go as far as charging someone but it is infuriating when parents don't seem to care or respect RSVP'ing.

    I had one family with 2 little girls RSVP for DD's party and then not show up. At $12 per person that was $24 that was wasted with no warning or notice. I would have greatly appreciated any length of notice. Someone else could have taken their place (DD has younger cousins that would have loved to go to a play gym no notice needed) or I could have saved myself $24 with a days notice (our payment was due in full the day before the event). Instead after waiting 30 minutes for them to arrive we figured they weren't coming.

    I understand kids get sick and emergencies come up but it only takes a minute to call (or even text) and explain. I've had to do that. DD accepted a party invitation last December, but on the morning of she woke up being sick. I called to explain to the mother as soon as I thought it was an acceptable time to do so (ie, 9 am instead of 5 am) then I arranged for DH to drop off the presents just before the party started so the birthday girls (twins) could still open DD's presents at the party. Sure I didn't have to drop off presents but I thought it was the least I could do with cancelling on such short notice. The mother was really appreciative and super nice about the whole thing.



    With this article they simply "over booked" themselves and the boy decided to go to his grandparents. Why didn't they call to explain when they realized? They didn't seem to care about the other child or his parents, which to me shows a complete lack of respect for others.
    sweetmomma likes this.


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    Quote Originally Posted by bargain_hunter_lola View Post
    I saw this months ago and found it interesting.

    I would never go as far as charging someone but it is infuriating when parents don't seem to care or respect RSVP'ing.

    I had one family with 2 little girls RSVP for DD's party and then not show up. At $12 per person that was $24 that was wasted with no warning or notice. I would have greatly appreciated any length of notice. Someone else could have taken their place (DD has younger cousins that would have loved to go to a play gym no notice needed) or I could have saved myself $24 with a days notice (our payment was due in full the day before the event). Instead after waiting 30 minutes for them to arrive we figured they weren't coming.

    I understand kids get sick and emergencies come up but it only takes a minute to call (or even text) and explain. I've had to do that. DD accepted a party invitation last December, but on the morning of she woke up being sick. I called to explain to the mother as soon as I thought it was an acceptable time to do so (ie, 9 am instead of 5 am) then I arranged for DH to drop off the presents just before the party started so the birthday girls (twins) could still open DD's presents at the party. Sure I didn't have to drop off presents but I thought it was the least I could do with cancelling on such short notice. The mother was really appreciative and super nice about the whole thing.



    With this article they simply "over booked" themselves and the boy decided to go to his grandparents. Why didn't they call to explain when they realized? They didn't seem to care about the other child or his parents, which to me shows a complete lack of respect for others.
    I've never understood why this happens. I'm a parent, hate when this happens when I'm planning a party, don't these people who are also parents get that? Why would other parents not get it? My bigger fear was outside of the financial part, was always, what if only a couple kids come, how will my DS feel then?

    For one party when DS was in grade 1 maybe, I even saw a parent of a kid we'd invited who hadn't responded at DS's after school caregiver, asked if they were going, he was very vague and said, "Oh we're not sure." WTF? Clearly you were not going, can you not just say no so I can invite some other kids? Really, I won't be upset if you say you can't come, just let me have the chance to invite other kids. ARGH.

    I was so glad at DS's ninth birthday party in April, he said he wanted to just invite a few kids to go to the movies and for pizza afterwards. SO much easier!

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    Interesting story. At work recently the social group was arranging a dinner at a restaurant for a staff member leaving .... they had booked a table for 20.... On the reminder notice it said that if you had committed and didn't show the cost was $35 per person. I asked what that was for and the explanation I got was that in this particular restaurant they had reserved a space for 20+ and the restaurant expected that number to show (and would bill for any number short of that) otherwise the group would be put in a smaller space. This was an informal dinner - not pre-ordered- no set menu - no entertainment - it was the first I had heard of such a thing but our social group said it was becoming more common with the restaurants they go to.

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    I heard about this, so ridiculous to charge them, especially for a kid's birthday. But I have heard this happens at restaurants and other booked events.

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    This is why we love kids birthdays at home. And the kids liked it too! Then they can invite the entire class and no worries who shows up/or doesn't show up. I always make sure to have enough loot bags regardless! And I always make way too much food anyway

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    Wow....I'll have to pass this along to our DD, who's planning their son's birthday next month at a gym/play zone where pizza and cake will be served. She said she doesn't care how many kids he invites, since the price is X-number of dollars per so many kids, and she paid for more kids rather than less. In other words, it's an "all in" fee, so if someone doesn't show up, no problem.

    I don't understand why the mother didn't have the courtesy to phone the other mother and tell her that her son can't attend that party. It would be obvious to me that a contact number would have to be on the invitation in order for people to RSVP. Otoh, charging that mom is just not done. Lesson learned? If you haven't heard from someone call THEM or send another note explaining that if the child can't attend, to please let them know, because they are paying per child potentially attending.

    It's so important to RSVP one way or another! I wish people would "get that"!


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    I understand that RSVP has a timeline to call in advance for confirm te attendance to the party if I didn't call that date is because I am not going to the party.... right?
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