December 2016 Frugal Chatter thread (all welcome)

[lizzie bargain]

J and C-no secrets in our household about money-all accounts and decisions are joint. But I can see where you are coming from if you tend to be the more responsible partner with $.

[Ciel]

@sweet sparrow -if you have coconut oil somewhere, see if applying it to the skin you can reach helps give you some relief. Consider GroceryGateway.com to be your new shopping buddy for next few weeks until you get a routine established with new baby. Delivery to your door will save you time and lifting (and LO will be thrilled to help unpack).

The Dec issue of Walmart's Live Better magazine: I see mention made of New Year's Eve food ideas. Think they'd be ideal suggestions for Xmas open house type gatherings if one did not wish to spend days putting a sit down meal together. Here's a party tip gleaned from reading Anthony Bourdain's new cookbook, Appetites : people always go for the pigs in blankets appetizers, no matter how attractive or different the other appetizers at a function are. He advises to save the pigs in blankets for last when you run out of other things and you will be seen as the host with the most.

Purchased some bell peppers, apples and dried apricots: I baked at 400F a toaster oven pan of cored Granny Smith apple wedges, some chopped parsnips & carrots and bell pepper strips (the orange pepper) on parchment paper for 25min. The apples had a half dried apple ring taste to them-very little scorching. The other produce was tasty. Mom is on an oil-free fasting diet this week so I wanted to offer something prepared differently for her to eat. She's avoiding my cooked lentils with salt and I noticed. I put some of the cut apricots (chopped into halves after a short soak in water) onto the other pan (also parchment paper lined) with the bulk of the parsnips and carrots and a little chopped green olives plus some of the pepper trimmings and added the mild curry and olive oil--mmm! The 400F is lower but it works for produce and does not burn the paper or produce as much (dried apricots can be charred within 20min if temp is over 400F). Besides, the parchment paper and olive oil have a high end range that ends at 400F so I stayed with it. However, if I had the chicken with the vegetables, I'd use the recipe's higher temperature because of the meat.

Also went to Canadian Tire for the $2 Palmolive detergent and $1 baking soda deals so a bit of stockup is done.

This is the second Wednesday that I have purchased the Toronto Sun for the Careers section. One page is devoted to how men can update their style for work. I see a knapsacky mens bag with laptop sleeve in a blue that is rather cool from Mountain Hardware. Last week's Careers section talked about the learning to code movement-this week has activities in major cities across Canada to encourage youth and adults to explore coding as a career.

BTW, there is a job ad on p.20 for OCT qualified a Gr. 6 teacher and a Gr.8 teacher plus a secondary math teacher if you are willing to work FT for Fort Albany First Nation in northeastern Ontario. The positions are available immediately with 100% paid benefits, competitive salary and Northern & travel allowances. Apply through Barry Achievement Group Inc. in London ON. PM me if you want all of the contact info in the ad.

[Frugalbigmama]

Here is a picture of the wonderful coupon. I love using on the small containers when they go on for $1. We use lots of sour cream so I just bought 8. Making DS nacho dip tonight for his lunch tomorrow

[Frugalbigmama]

Well I think I like Wednesday vacation days. Stopped at GT. They have 4 pack activia yogurt on for $1. I just happened to have coupons for .50 off any activia. Bought 4 packs! Have a pick up tonight for $20. I posted tons of stuff and love when people want a bunch of stuff 😀

[Natalka]

So does anyone else not disclose certain "good financial" news to their significant other for 1 reason or another?

Goodness no!

Good or bad, no secrets at all - about financial or anything else. It's always been family money, so each of us deserves to know everything. We have everything joint.

Gah, the frigid cold, w/c -32 last night, probably the same tonight.
However, the SUN came to visit this afternoon, so that's amazing!
Don't like the cold without snow, though!

[Ciel]

This household does not talk budgets (everyone says its their money) much except the rare time usually in relation to a gift for a wedding but not the cost of buying clothes for the occasion or related baking or all that time/transit spent going to and from stores or shopping etc. If I had good financial news (lottery win of six digits or even five digits before the decimal place, I'd likely have to disclose something at home but would indicate what the spending priorities/intended allocations would be so as to curtail any demanded sprees by the other three. I know this family-one parent has been more helpful in life than other so that would factor into allocations as well as consideration what might be needed at home for all to benefit so no noses are out of joint.)

Given that the two people with the most spending power decide almost unilaterally what they will buy, they seldom think about how the space at home is for 4 adults, not 2. Accordingly, one should not hog all the storage space and be responsible about stock rotation, recycling, packaging-not happening here. They also tend to make decisions on home repair services or goods but I'll get involved sometimes in those discussions. I make sure to keep tabs on the information as it does get limited to a general announcement that company ___ is coming on this day at ___ to do the ____. And that is about it.

Since the question asker does have regular financial discussions with DH and there was another question related to money in regards to one son's career intentions, I'd recommend that money saved part has to be framed in context of how that was achieved and linked to expected New Year's increases in utilities (hydro!), food prices and let's not forget property taxes in any discussion. Also relevant is that the DH has a regular position that helped with the budget. so he has to know some of that income has toontinued to be saved as buffer for renos/unexpected vehicle costs/other costs that need paying. Think there needs to be a money talks book brought into the home to work on the career goals of son in terms of budgeting for a car and other resources-what money does son currently have access to to potentially move toward career resources? What if DH has to stop working if he gets sick or needs time off for a reason? The home budget would have to stop some expenses to follow suit.

What if the question asker has to take time off for one reason or the other-can the family live off of supplies at home or does she really always have to be the authority on money matters? The ideal situation is DH or asker take turns being accountable with the family budget but there are differences of opinion and sometimes you have to favour one or the other to keep the family peace at home.

[thriftygranny]

So does anyone else not disclose certain "good financial" news to their significant other for 1 reason or another?

My husband is a financial planner so there are no secrets here!!! I do all of our banking and we discuss plans for investing, purchasing etc. However I do put any extra cash from my monthly budget I have at the end of the month and squirrel it away so I have some surprise money at the end of the year...usually to buy him something awesome for Christmas!!

[thriftygranny]

@thriftygrannybaby it's cold outside.....wowzers, hope it gets a tad warmer soon. I don't know if you have a Costco near you but you can get a massive bag of pecans for like $20, just a thought. Very kind of you to help your son's friend with his mom's gift.

I know I could go to Costco but I try to avoid Costco at all costs. Especially this time of year!!! I may bite the bullet and go but i honestly think I will let my membership go when it comes up for renewal.I resent paying to shop anywhere (even though I get a kick back of my purchases) Most stores are fighting for my dollars with rewards...and Costco charges you to shop there, I just don't get it.I will miss the 5 or 6 things I go for that are great buys but I think I can get over it!!

[jasperandchar]

I think I need to clarify my question and my information re: So does anyone else not disclose certain "good financial" news to their significant other for 1 reason or another?

All of our accounts are joint.
Dh does have access to all accounts BUT does not like online banking so avoids it.
When we do our monthly budget we go over the 10 accounts that get monthly transfers to them for various expenditures and goals.
When doing the monthly budget dh is aware of the amounts being transferred and all monthly expenses (musts, wants) but dh does not ask how much is available or saved up from the various account as they each have their own purpose.

Some of the accounts are for the kids, we purchased them a waterfront lot a few years back using the funds put in monthly and the property has increased $40K since it's purchase.

Dh has every right to know the comings and goings of the finances. Dh does absolutely contribute to the household pot, HOWEVER, His work pays are not in the monthly budget which allows us to stash funds aside considerably.

We budget on 1 income (mine)

My wording was poor I will admit as I obviously did not mean to imply that I am a deceitful person and not share the finances with my equal partner.

I guess since the question has never BEEN asked how much $ do all these accounts add up to...I don't announce that between all 10 accounts we have xxx amount of $ accessible.

Perhaps my wording was off or misleading
The bottom line is I'm a saver and dh is a spender (black & white).

I'm sorry if I have offended anyone or made myself look like a sneak as that is not the case whatsoever, dh has all faith in my budgeting and saving skills so he would never feel like I kept him in the dark.

My apologies if I offended anyone.

[coupon girl]

jasper in regards to your question
-we have one income now and hubby and I are both savers (him a little more extreme than I am )
-we have joint accounts-and what is his is mine and mine is his -we both know what is in our chequing and savings and rrsp's at all times
-I do online banking and tell him when I pay the bills ,even online shopping I have a small credit card from my last job and fully tell him what I have spent
-jasper no offense taken -my mom was a saver and my dad a spender -so he handed all his cheques over to her thru the years and she dispursed some money to him for spending
-both my in-laws were spenders to the extreme (gamblers also) so maybe that's why hubby is more of a saver than me -just a bit more

[coupon girl]

well had a fun day with my son ,daughter Sebastian and ashlyn -I treated my kids to lunch out which was nice -my daughter bought croissants in a fancy bakery for us later
-ashlyn did good going to the washroom -but freaked out in the basement of the restaurant(when I took her down) as she didn't want to use their washrooms -infact my son told me she didn't want to use fortinos washroom the other day -she only likes going at home .or my house or at my daughter's today -lol
-we watched Sebastian have a bath today -ohh my daughter let ashlyn help she was in heaven helping wash her baby boy cousin -too cute -took and hour and a half to get home got in at 6.30
Thursday plans relax and time for me going out with a friend I haven't seen since spring for supper at swiss chalet

[Ciel]

@jasperandchar I apologize for any offense my reply or sensitive area I may have touched. You are honest in your posts. I did not perceive you to be misleading, deceitful or whatever else about your question. My answers come from seeing parents and related kin basically show varying moneyhandling skills, the main one seeming to be in control of whatever money they handled because the adults in each relationship were not on the same page regarding expenses, priorities and timing of purchases. Lots of conflict, I'd say! What I meant by context is framing the news with how the news was achieved. That way you and DH both understand which store programs, coupons or promotions helped and which were not useful, which bulk buys and timing of purchases lined up with needs and which buys or deals were lemons needing conversion to lemonade.Then you discuss which of those things are used for next year and which things are h*** no avoid at all costs for your 2017 budget. Share the glories and the pains.Otherwise, some things are likely to repeat despite good intentions. At what point do you and DH like to have your sons get involved with some buying decisions in the budget or doing the purchasing? It helps to say what things need doing and how you'd like to step back in some areas and have them step forward.

I have seen merit in withholding information at times at home because I have been on the receiving end of too many furies and anger from other family members who don't even acknowledge what I say. It's usually their way or anger. Context sometimes got through to them with my answers but regardless, I am not often listened to.
You have funds in reserve-your family is miles ahead of mine. As I type, I am seated near the $12k white elephant second bathroom. Sure a second toilet and sink are useful but the $4k spent on the shower area was a bad idea. What if the project had been brought up at the family table and discussed? I think the shower area would have been nixed and the ceramic tiles dropped for vinyl flooring. The money could have directed to much need step repairs but never happened.

When discussing money matters, each person really is different. I wish we all had some budgeting course or classes during middle or early high school years. Thankfully libraries stock some of the books that help adults find guidance in financial matters when home did not have the answers or gave the wrong ones.

[thriftygranny]

double post???

[thriftygranny]

I didn't find your question offensive at all JasperandChar. I think if the info is there for him to go over with you then it is his responsibility to do the math. When couples have two different spending patterns it can be very stressful especially if someone is an over spender, they have to have limits and if it works for you two that is great!!

[Natalka]

Good morning!

Went through flyers for next week, but realized some deals at Co-op this week are better for some items, so we'll get those today.

Stay warm, those of you in a similar frigid boat as us!