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Thread: Club Q Q107-Loyalty Club (Southern ON Only) v4

  1. #33676
    Still keeping the faith SillyLoocie's Avatar
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    Name:  Mitt or Mr Burns.jpg
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  2. #33677
    Fear is the mind killer rock lobster's Avatar
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    CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS

    A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles..

    The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.

    He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife..

    She directs him down the correct aisle.

    A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.

    She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?

    He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store

    to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco

    and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo- ooo much cheaper.

    So, I figure if I have to roll my own ........... so does she.



    If I have to explain
    you won't understand
    Last edited by rock lobster; Tue, Mar 6th, 2012 at 09:46 PM.


    Some lies are more easily believed than the truth.

  3. #33678
    craziest canuck crazyredneck's Avatar
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    good evening all, a super late night, same tomorrow, but take friday off, maybe a day or two next week. everyone enjoy the next couple days, suppose to be double digits on the plus side.

  4. #33679
    Canadian Guru Lee03's Avatar
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  5. #33680
    Canadian Genius attitash's Avatar
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    Hi Q sters ....awesome day on the slopes...back to w*rk tomorrow...sigh.

  6. #33681
    6ffighter9 6ffightr9's Avatar
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    Train

    A scientist gets on a train to go to New York. His cabin also has a poor farmer in it. To pass the time the scientist decides to play a game with the guy.
    "I will ask you a question and if you get it wrong, you have to pay me 1 dollar. Then you ask me a question, and if I get it wrong, you get 10 dollars. You ask me a question first." The farmer thinks for a while.
    "I know. What has three legs, takes 10 hours to climb up a palm tree, and 10 seconds to get back down?"
    The scientist is confused and thinks long and hard about the question. Finally, the train ride is coming to an end. As it pulls into the station, the scientist takes out 10 dollars and gives it to the farmer.
    "I don't know. What has 3 legs, takes 10 hours to get up a palm tree and 10 seconds to get back down?"
    The farmer takes the 10 dollars and puts it into his pocket. He then takes out 1 dollar and hands it to the scientist.
    "I don't know."

  7. #33682
    Canadian Genius Mechman47's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by waynethegolfer View Post
    : Golf Membership Application

    An elderly Scottish Jew decided to retire and take up golf, so he applied
    for membership at a local golf club.

    About a week later he received a letter that his application has been
    rejected.

    He went to the club to inquire as to why.
    Secretary: You are aware that this is a Scottish golf club?

    Scot: Aye, but I am as Scottish as you are, ma'am, my name is MacTavish.

    Secretary: Do you know that on formal occasions we wear a kilt?

    Scot: Aye, I do know, and I wear a kilt too.

    Secretary: You are also aware, that we wear nothing under the kilt?

    Scot: Aye, and neither do I.

    Secretary: Are you also aware, that the members sit naked in the steam
    room?

    Scot: Aye, I also do the same.

    Secretary: But you are a Jew?

    Scot: Aye, I be that.

    Secretary: So, being Jewish, you are circumcised, is that correct?

    Scot: Aye, I be that, too.

    Secretary: I am terribly sorry, but the members just would not feel
    comfortable sitting in the steam room with you, since your privates are
    different from theirs.

    Scot: Ach, away with ya, ma'am. I know that you have to be a
    Protestant t o march with the Orangemen. And I know that you have to be a
    Catholic to join the Knights of Columbus. But this is the first time I've
    heard that you have to be a complete prick to join a golf club.
    Enough said!
    That's f^[k'n brilliant!

  8. #33683
    Canadian Genius Mechman47's Avatar
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    Wear your sporran low and watch the bloody wind!

  9. #33684
    Canadian Genius Mechman47's Avatar
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  10. #33685
    Canadian Genius Mechman47's Avatar
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  11. #33686
    heartgirl99 heartgirl99's Avatar
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    night qt's
    looking forward to some warm temps tomorrow!

  12. #33687
    Cat Trainer (Trainee??) Andit's Avatar
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    Hope everyone enjoyed their day.

    Please spare some more prayers for my friend. I just got an update. She's still in ICU on a ventilator (there's some sort of fungus in her lungs now that they are dealing with). In addition, 2 other family members are dealing with health issues.


    I went out tonight with some friends for a bit of stress relief. Always a good thing.

    Night all.

    For a smile, see our vids: http://www.youtube.com/lilyquincy

  13. #33688
    Everything is Awesome! :D
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    Happy Wednesday!


    Ronnie Montrose - Zero G

    http://youtu.be/-_UvGoMSPI4




    Ronnie Montrose - Town Without Pity - Night of the Guitars 1991

    http://youtu.be/rN0-CRDdsw4


  14. #33689
    Everything is Awesome! :D
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    Ennio Morricone - The Demise of Barbara and the Return of Joe

    http://youtu.be/Ez_J9Vf1tYU


  15. #33690
    Septuagenarian The Jester's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lee03 View Post
    That is a remarkable card trick Lee. I've never seen anything like it before

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