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Thu, Aug 16th, 2012, 09:43 PM #52426
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- Whitby
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Sex at 79
I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox,informing me that I can have sex at 79 ! I'm so happy, because I live at number 71. So it's not too far to walk home afterwards. And it’s the same side of the street so I don’t have to cross the road !
Last edited by 22hicks; Thu, Aug 16th, 2012 at 09:45 PM.
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Thu, Aug 16th, 2012, 09:53 PM #52427
A guy is browsing in a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch.
It doesn't have any feet or legs.
The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot?'
The parrot says, 'I was born this way.
I'm a defective parrot.'
'Holy crap,' the guy replies.
'You actually understood and answered me. !'
'I got every word,' says the parrot.
'I happen to be a highly intelligent, and a thoroughly educated bird'
'Oh yeah?' the guy asks.
'Then answer this, how do you hang onto your perch, without any feet.?'
'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing, but since you
asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar, like a little hook.
You can't see it, because of my feathers.'
'Wow,' says the guy.
'You really can understand, and can speak English, can't you.?'
'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with
reasonable competence on almost any topic, politics, religion, sports,
physics, philosophy.
I'm especially good at ornithology.
You really ought to buy me, I'd be a great companion.'
The guy looks at the $200.00 price tag.
'Sorry, but I just can't afford that.'
'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody
wants me, cause I don't have any feet.
You can probably get me for $20, just make the guy an offer.!'
The guy offers $20, and walks out with the parrot.
Weeks go by.
The parrot is sensational.
He has a great sense of humor, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he
understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful.
The guy is delighted.
One day the guy comes home from work, and the parrot goes,
'Psssssssssssst,' and motions him over with one wing.
'I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your
wife, and the UPS man.'
'What are you talking about,?' asks the guy.
'When the UPS man delivered a package today, your wife greeted him at
the door, in a sheer black nightie.'
'WHAT???' the guy asks incredulously.
'THEN what happened?'
'Well, then the UPS man came into the house, and lifted up her
nightie, and began petting her all over,' reported the parrot.
'NO!' he exclaims, 'and she let him.?'
'Yes.
Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees, and
began to kiss her all over.'
Then the frantic guy demands, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED.?'
DUNNO?!? I got a hard-on, and fell off my perch.!'
If this doesn't make you laugh, you're having a really bad day.NASCAR SEASON is complete for 2021.
Kyle Larson wins his 1st Nascar Championship.
nascar:a way of life
everything else is just a game
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Thu, Aug 16th, 2012, 10:05 PM #52428
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
- Location
- Beaches, Toronto
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Hi All! Just arrived back from Port Stanley and Port Dover. Had a nice time. Weather was pretty good, better than expected and the cottage was nice, steps to the beach. The Port Stanley Beach was much bigger than the Port Dover one we were at today.
Don't know if I should bother catching up on the last few days of RUSH words, has anyone got the pre-call?
Got some catching up to do on here and with my puds and putting stuff away etc. Talk to you later, hope all is well with everyone!
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Thu, Aug 16th, 2012, 10:11 PM #52429
- Join Date
- Jun 2010
- Location
- No one goes off-trail. No one walks alone.
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[QUOTE=psells;4903123]I also have a soft spot for that tune. Just something about it.
Apparently, everything about Jeri Ryan - including the voice - is real.
Sorry Peter, I don't doubt your honesty but something like this I just have to check for myself.
She even comes with her own towel!!!
Last edited by rock lobster; Thu, Aug 16th, 2012 at 10:32 PM.
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Thu, Aug 16th, 2012, 10:14 PM #52430
night all
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Thu, Aug 16th, 2012, 10:24 PM #52431
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
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- Beaches, Toronto
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Marineland theme song singer wants voice pulled from commercials
By Staff Torstar News Service
Share this Article
Torstar News Service Ikaika, the male killer whale, swimming at Marineland on July 11. Suzie McNeil, the Toronto singer who voiced the Marineland jingle, wants her voice pulled from the ubiquitous commercials.
“I need to get the tag line replaced with ‘all the whales haaaaate… Marineland!’” McNeil tweeted Wednesday.
The singer posted the statement after former Marineland employees told Torstar News Service of poor water conditions, chronic short-staffing and repeated instances of animal suffering at the park.
Related:- SPCA to inspect Marineland animals
- Marineland baby beluga’s death raises questions
- Former staffers say animals at Marineland are suffering
The singer signed over the rights to her performance of the song when she penned a contract with Marineland in 2004.
“Because of the original contract, Marineland owns and has the right to continue using that recording, despite my feelings,” McNeil said in a public statement. “I plan on investigating this issue further, and doing anything in my power to help these animals.”
McNeil, a Juno-nominated artist who once sang backup vocals for American artist Pink, was paid a lump sum to record the jingle in 2004. She doesn’t receive continued payments.
“I was very shocked and saddened to read the article published today in the Toronto Star describing animals suffering neglect and illness at Marineland. No animal should ever suffer, especially at the hands of human beings,” she said.
McNeil’s publicist said the artist won’t attend Saturday’s protest organized outside Marineland due to her touring schedule.
So glad to hear they are finally investigating that place. I've hated hearing that damn song for a long time now!!!!
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 05:25 AM #52432
Morning all. Happy Friday
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:10 AM #52433
good morning qt's!
friday's here!
Last edited by heartgirl99; Fri, Aug 17th, 2012 at 06:12 AM.
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:14 AM #52434
karl sends in the following overnight RUSH winning words:
2338 ===> permanent
0033 ===>pictures
0433 ===> bones
0547 ===>counterparts
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:20 AM #52435
did anyone get the pre-call?
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:26 AM #52436
- Join Date
- Apr 2010
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- Peterborough
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Good morning Q sters...a wet morning has my round of golf in jepoardy.
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:27 AM #52437
- Join Date
- Apr 2010
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A sign summer is winding down
Local 17 Aug, 2012 0
134th CNE opens Friday with new Sky Ride
TORONTO, Ont. - This Friday the grand old lady by the lake opens her doors for another year, and that means only one thing, the summer is quickly drawing to a close.
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:39 AM #52438
for me and hopefully for some of you too.
Hope you all have an awesome weekend and I'll try to pop in to say HI in the next two weeks.
Take care and be safe out there.While walking the I to
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nature-bug
"You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus"~~Mark Twain
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:49 AM #52439
rush ===>echo
Last edited by heartgirl99; Fri, Aug 17th, 2012 at 06:50 AM.
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Fri, Aug 17th, 2012, 06:58 AM #52440
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
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- Oshawa
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Good Morning Q sters
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