OK... OK...
I made it...
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8...nzjco1_500.gif
Now what?
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OK... OK...
I made it...
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8...nzjco1_500.gif
Now what?
Today is, Read a Book Day! Read for yourself or to someone else!
http://thepoeticallyincorrect.files....ing-a-book.jpg
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs and make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!'
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
'OLD' IS WHEN....
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
'OLD' IS WHEN
'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take a laxative today.
'OLD' IS WHEN....
'Getting lucky' means yo u find your car in the parking lot.
'OLD' IS WHEN...
An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.
'OLD' IS WHEN....
Your spouse offers you super sex, and you reply, "I'll have the soup."
'OLD' IS WHEN....
You're not sure if these are facts or jokes.
Morning Q-sters
Have a thirsty Thursday :-)
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Hi guys! Happy Thirsty Thursday to everyone. Just popping in to catch up, it has been a crazy few days here at our house, getting back intot he school routine etc. Big Congrats to the Karl/Ecatt for the Triumph win-that should amazing, have fun with them MM and Lee! Pretty sure I have my lines down pat for tomorrow so I am going to go enjoy a little retail therapy today-hope everyone has a great day...
ARE WE THE ONES WHO ARE AGING??
ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.
I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
'We don't have half dozen nuggets,' said the
teenager at the counter.
'You don't?' I replied.
'We only have six, nine, or twelve,' was the reply.
'So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?'
'That's right.'
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets
(Unbelievable but sadly true...)
(Must have been the same one I asked for sweetener,
and she said they didn't have any, only Splenda and sugar.)
TWO
I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me
put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those dividers that they
keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed.
After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
divider, looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is?'
I said to her 'I've changed my mind; I don't think I'll buy that today.'
She said 'OK,' and I paid her for the things and left.
She had no clue to what had just happened.
( But the lady behind me had a big smirk on her face as I left)
THREE
A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her disk drive and pulling it out very quickly.
When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM 'thingy.'
FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. 'Do you need some help?' I asked. She replied, 'I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?'
'Hmmm, I don't know. Do you have an alarm, too?' I asked.
'No, just this remote thingy,' she answered,
handing it and the car keys to me. As I
took the key and manually unlocked the door, I
replied, 'Why don't you drive over there and
check about the batteries. It's a long walk....'
FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, 'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?' 'Just use paper from the photocopier', the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies.
SIX
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room because the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine. The mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer......'
Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency right now!'
Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid!!!!
Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60 and heading towards 70:
1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.
4. People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
7. Things you buy now won't wear out.
8. You can eat supper at 5 PM.
9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.
10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.
11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.
13. You sing along with elevator music.
14. Your eyes won't get much worse.
15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.
17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
19. You can't remember who sent you this list.
20. And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience.
Forward this to everyone you can remember right now!
Never, under any circumstances,
take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night !
:sun::sun: Good Morning! :sun::sun:
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Good Morning All! Looks like a nice day today. I hope your wrong about the rain on the weekend H team - again there are a lot of outdoor festivals I want to attend - too many all at once as usual!!!! as for tonight all I can say is -
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A friend of mine runs a farm sanctuary outside of Uxbridge (Snooters) and she's trying to get her little rescue pug Pook into the top 10 of the (Facebook) Fido casting call contest. If Pook wins you don't just help one dog, you help all the wonderful rescues animals living at Snooters. Will you give him your vote? You don't need to sign up for anything, just click on the link and then click vote. Thanks so much!
Voting link: http://fidocastingcall.ca/dog/1344943976_502a3768bde65/
Snooters Web Page: http://snootersforeverhome.com/
http://img17.imageshack.us/img17/2277/pook3.jpg
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