It's like finding buried treasure.
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It's like finding buried treasure.
Poor Patty the party planner..........
Company Memo FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: November 1, 2015
RE: Ga la Christmas Party
I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House.
There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus!
A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM. Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets.
This gathering is only for employees!
Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time!
Merry Christmas to you and your family,
Patty
Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: November 2, 2015
RE: Gala Holiday Party
In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year.
However, from now on, we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians and to those still celebrating Reconciliation Day.
There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols will be sung.
We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.
Happy now?
Happy Holidays to you and your family,
Patty
Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: November 3, 2015
RE: Holiday Party
Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, you didn't sign your name...
I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn't be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this?
Somebody?
And sorry, but forget about the gift exchange, no gifts are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and the executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy.
REMEMBER: NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.
Patty
Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
DATE: November 4, 2015
RE: Generic Holiday Party
What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20thbegins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours.
There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs. Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything for you to take it home in little foil doggy baggy. Will that work?
Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet, and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms.
Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each group will have their own table.
Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table.
To the person asking permission to cross dress, the Grill House asks that no cross-dressing be allowed, apparently because of concerns about confusion in the restrooms. Sorry.
We will have booster seats for short people.
Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet.
I am sorry to report that we cannot control the amount of salt used in the food . The Grill House suggests that people with high blood pressure taste a bite first.
There will be fresh "low sugar" fruits as dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply "no sugar" desserts. Sorry!
Did I miss anything?!?!?
Patty
Company Memo
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: November 5, 2015
RE: The Holiday Party
I've had it with you vegetarian pricks!!! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your salad bar, including organic tomatoes.
But you know, tomatoes have feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!
The rest of you wierdos can kiss my behind. I hope you all have a rotten holiday!
Company Memo
FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: November 6, 2015
RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party
I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery from her recent nervous breakdown and I'll continue to forward your cards to her at the asylum.
In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.
Happy Whatever!
Joan
Good Morning all. Happy Saturday!
gee patty lewis i always like to sit with the gay men :-)
good morning :)
hoping most have their christmas in the mostly done done phase,
lucky me does. and good i do as can barely use my right hand, extra
lucky am left handed, as i played my silly playing with CRAZY maddy
cat game, ie run hand up door frame, to get her to jump and MISS my
hand --- i lost and am now on antibiotics, darn shoot, (and a tetanus shot)
have time schedule for meds, (miss lilly's every 12 hours, mine every 8)
and am not supposed to take codeine, haha i do a lot.
so any decent schedule inclined person able to write me a schedule,
that includes sleeping for at least 10 hours? and food included with every
pill lilly and i take? yikes sounds like one of those arithmetic
questions we had as kids, except it is not apples, or miles.
gave up and just found the beer - and hoping my liver keeps working,,,
shutting up and checking my schedule list, before major nap.
personally not amused by the lack of weather, heard golf courses
were opening, wth?
hoping everyone gets a great day- yikes it's caturday, well that makes
so much sense for me, eh? :cat: :)
the teacher was fired, can't type anymore except,,,,, oh geeeQuote:
Originally Posted by kenrod
Good morning everyone.Attachment 301468
Morning Q-sters
Enjoy the weekend :-)
Good morning every1.
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Hello everybody.
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*
OOOOHHHHH No's
Getting a little flurry of that white stuff....
Please substitute book with money for me,Quote:
Originally Posted by SillyLoocie
thnx in advance :lol:
I Love to Read.Quote:
Originally Posted by SillyLoocie
The Ol' Fashioned Way, too.
Give me a Paperback or Hardcover and I am Happy!!
Not once have I ever Read a "Book" Online, with no Intensions to Begin.
I Miss this Place!!!!
Attachment 301480
This rainbow has no end
http://files.brightside.me/files/new...8D-1000-11.jpg
