Am I overreacting?

[couponmummy]

Happy Birthday!!

If nothing happens tonight, I say cancel his Under The Blankie Club membership until further notice.

[anastasia1009]

Happy Birthday
men just don't understand I find and they don't remember dates at all. Yesterday night was out 6 year anniversary and bf remembered but didn't say much. Then he kept on saying 6 years that is a long time. Then tonight made a huge dinner cause last night couldn't do much cause of school and after dinner he fell asleep. All I can say is MEN you love being with them but sometimes they are a foreign creature/

[westcoastblondie]

Happy Birthday to you!
I'm sorry that he hasn't been even the least bit nice for your birthday. You're not overreacting, he should at least acknowledge your birthday, even if he doesn't buy you something. Like you mentioned, you don't need him to spend money on you, just to acknowledge that it's your birthday and you're special to him. I hope that you're able to tell him how you feel.

[MrsSunshine]

oh K8.. i really hope the reason you haven't posted in a few hours is because he had a huge surprise planned for you.. otherwise.. he' def. be in the dog house and his 'under the blankie' membership revoked for sure until further notice..
Happy Birthday my friend.. *clink* cheers..

[coupongirl99]

Happy Birthday indeed! And as many have said, nope not over reacting, its a bummer when its not remembered.

[Shwa Girl]

OP. Maybe you could do reverse psychology.
The day after your birthday, make him a nice breakfast. Then a nice dinner. Maybe cake for dessert - like a birthday cake style.

Do this for a few days.

See if he gets it.
Maybe the guilt will get to him.

If nothing else, you are are showing him that you are the better person, and are willing to show how much you care -- and not take him for granted.

Hope this suggestion works for you.

[IMLN]

I hope you are curently in party mode and that he supprised you
If not kick his butt

[francine1985]

Happy Birthday

you are not overreacting at all.
birthdays are a big deal to me and dh knew that before we even started dating. birthdays weren't a big deal to his family when he was growing up but they were always a big deal in mine. he has always done something for my birthday even if it was just an extra special dinner. (he does all the cooking so i mean a gourmet style dinner that he makes for special occasions). and despite the fact that birthdays don't mean much to him he always makes sure we have a good birthday party for ds including home made party games, some loot bags, and prizes.

you have to let him know how important birthdays, anniversaries, other special occasions are to you. if he knows and still doesn't do anything or at least tell you "happy ..." in person than you have to let him know how much it hurts you and that he cant just ignore things that are important to you if he cares for and respects you at all.

I really hope you are having a fun day with or without him. happy birthday

[Darth Penguin]

If it bothers you, then tell DBF in simple easy to listen to words..." DBF..I'm hurt you didn't wish me a happy birthday/get me a gift/card"

Explain how his actions hurt you and what you want in future...If he says that not how his family do things...explain again how it hurt you and how you felt that he didn't try to meet your expectations..

Don't accuse him by saying "You didn't" but use " I feel" "I want", "I... "phases work better on most men since there is an expectation of mutuality..

[Darth Penguin]

birthdays are a big deal to me and dh knew that before we even started dating. birthdays weren't a big deal to his family when he was growing up but they were always a big deal in mine.

We are the opposite but over the years we've worked out a solution which works for both of us, given our b'days are 6 days apart and has Mother's Day added into the mix...

[francine1985]

We are the opposite but over the years we've worked out a solution which works for both of us, given our b'days are 6 days apart and has Mother's Day added into the mix...

dh birthday is January 18th and this year i used one of my christmas (a chapters gift card from my dad) to get him a video game he really wanted. my birthday is in early June and i don't know what hes going to do this year because if my doctor has my birthday in his hospital hour schedule i can have ds#2 on my birthday (he wont know till a month before what his hospital/surgery hours will be) so we might be in the hospital. makes it kind of hard to plan anything ahead of time.

[K8's Fate]

Thank you for all you support, wishes, and suggestions. We're such a great SC community, and this thread proves that

So sadly, there were no surprises planned. I mentioned how hurt I was, especially after just spending so much time, effort and money on his birthday only a few weeks ago. All I received was a lame excuse that he went yesterday to buy me a gift but the store was closed (didn't tell me what that gift was though).

Why are some guys so dumb?!?! Honestly, I didn't want anything extravagant. Just a thoughtful touch, showing me that he put some thought and effort into my day. I just feel so used. For his birthday I bought him an amazing gift (Bosch mitre saw gcm12sd) and it was f-ing expensive!

I can't speak to or even look at him! This will take a lot to get over.

Thanks again for your kind words. Each of your posts was more effort than he could even afford...

[marstec]

It sounds like your bf needs some "sensitivity" training. I'm thinking this might not be the first time he has done something like this. I guess you need to pick your battles...what is important to you? Have a talk with him and set some up ground rules. If birthdays are important to you, then make sure he knows it. Some men are forgetful, but it doesn't sound like he forgot since he did the FB thing. There is "give and take" in any relationship - he needs to know that he hurt you when he ignored your birthday and hopefully he can make amends.

[Colsgirl]

Hey, Happy Birthday to you and me too!! My DH is bad not quite that bad, but if I leave it to him my gift is always something that Save On sells as it is the closest grocery store to our home and he always "remembers" on his way home from wherever. But I have learnt he is like that and he will never change. So I buy my own gifts that way I get what I want and he can't complain that I spent too much. I usually end up picking something for the house so we all benefit but I get the design/shade/style that I like!! I used to get upset and ticked but once I realised I either go with the way he is or trade him in, I go with the way it is. Since I started buying my own gifts I have had some pretty amazing stuff

[Abby5]

Happy Birthday!! Personally I would be soooo happy!! I hate birthdays especially mine!!!