ARMY AND SLAMMIE's Crazy Christmas Advent Package Train

[HeatherWake]

....and now the anxiety sets in. After seeing everyone else's parcels I wonder if I did enough? Everything I got was off her list....and I had the foresight to choose things that were physically a smaller size to cut back on shipping. There were still 10 items or so that I REALLY wanted to get, but had to stop myself or I would have bought the whole damn list! I think I have "Sudden-Onset Package Imagined Inadequacy Syndrome"...SOPIIS for short!
Anyone else get this? Its only my second train! I think I did ok the first time around...a bit more comfy this time....ackkk.

[tasha313]

....and now the anxiety sets in. After seeing everyone else's parcels I wonder if I did enough? Everything I got was off her list....and I had the foresight to choose things that were physically a smaller size to cut back on shipping. There were still 10 items or so that I REALLY wanted to get, but had to stop myself or I would have bought the whole damn list! I think I have "Sudden-Onset Package Imagined Inadequacy Syndrome"...SOPIIS for short!
Anyone else get this? Its only my second train! I think I did ok the first time around...a bit more comfy this time....ackkk.

I totally share your anxiety. I also went for the smaller sized stuff (not necessarily cheapest lol!) but I also went through every single post and WL item and I have them nearly all. The rest I had to improvise and read between the lines basically.. There was a couple direct items I didn't get cause it was too expensive after everything else .
Don't worry I'm sure itll be great. This is also just my second train.

[HeatherWake]

I totally share your anxiety. I also went for the smaller sized stuff (not necessarily cheapest lol!) but I also went through every single post and WL item and I have them nearly all. The rest I had to improvise and read between the lines basically.. There was a couple direct items I didn't get cause it was too expensive after everything else .
Don't worry I'm sure itll be great. This is also just my second train.

You put in a lot of background work Tasha, reading posts etc.... Im sure your buddy will love it!

[new2sc]

Tasha, awesome wrapping! DD looks sweet, and so does Pooh DS! Were they betrothed to each other? I forget? It was a whirlwind of matchmaking activity! I dont even remember if I pawned off my 14yr old DD...I KNOW my 23 yr old son is still up for grabs for one very lucky girl! Shmee?? He's great with kids!! :D

BUDDY UPDATE: Your parcel is now scheduled for delivery in two days!!! Are you gonna be home on thursday?

I wont be if I'm your buddy! But they always leave it on the step, or a card to pick up later.

[Norma Mackay-Rempel]

Today is a pretty somber day around my house. Vaguely talked to DD on fb last night, and by the sounds of it she may not even come home for Christmas!!!!! That is going to be EXTREAMLY upsetting and uncomfortable being around everyone without her! Hubby's moms bday is on Dec 2 and she wants the whole family together on Dec 1 to go for brunch or something and even that were dreading! its going to be again, EXTREAMLY uncomfortable when our own child doesnt even want to talk to us!!!! Yet thats all MIL is wanting for her birthday! The last couple days I have been in a state of being so confused and pissed off and upset that i cant even cry anymore. i feel so cried out. Hubby went to bed crying last night and I just dont have it in me to even shed a tear anymore!!! I was was told by my aunt (the crisis worker) to pull tough love and say "get your ass home or your sh*t will be packed up and waiting on the front step for you". Tomm. will be 3 weeks since we heard or even seen her!!!!! When I ask she cant even give me a straight answer as to why she doesnt want to talk or come home. I really reaching my breaking point and feeling more and more like I have to go to the doc and get on some anti-depressants again (I have dealt with depression in the past, and its not a fun thing!)

Hugs pooh!

Pooh...HUGS. This is going to seem like heartless advice, but its your call to take it or leave it. As you know from our private talks, I was a piece of sh*t to MY parents (due to them treating me poorly), and Ive been on the other side with my son being an a&$hole to me and his sisters. I agree with your aunt. Clearly your DD is staying put. Fine. My experience is that 16 year old girls can (and will) be little biatches to their moms. Try not to take it personally. Either she will come home when she is ready or she won't. How long do you think this "other family" is going to put up with her?? Probably not forever. You have NOT lost her. The day she was born, you knew that eventually she would be moving out. This is obviously sooner than anticipated, but it WAS going to happen. Let her learn this lesson that life isn't always fun and roses, and she will appreciate you. Give her space. Stamping and crying and stressing yourself out is doing NOTHING to sway her back into your house. Its accomplishing nothing but making your DD think you are a mean, crazy witch....it will cause stress on your younger son having him see mom and dad so upset all the time, and he will come to blame his sister....its already affecting your health! Its hard, an seems impossible, but just breathe and let her go. In all likelihood, she WILL return, and THEN you can have the conversation about rules, respect etc. In the meantime, turn it around on her, be civil, but not accomodating, dont give her money, facebook her a deadline to come get her stuff, and give her a shot of reality, maybe just knowing that you arent being a crazy person about it, recognizing her need for independence, will soften her stubbornness just a little. And know that we are here for venting to!!

I have to agree with Heather too! I know that when I was younger if my parents demanded something from me I only fought back harder and would purposely try to hurt them and me in the process because I wasn't meeting up to their expectations or mine. But, then when I was left alone and was able to make my own decisions and was asked what I would like to do about the situation it was a different story. I felt like they weren't pressuring me into doing anything. I was also very dramatic. I am not anymore! lol

It isn't you that has lost her way it is your DD.... she just needs some time and the advice from Heather I think is the best!

Sorry if I shouldn't have said anything! I hope it is okay!

[Norma Mackay-Rempel]

BUDDY UPDATE: Your parcel is now scheduled for delivery in two days!!! Are you gonna be home on thursday?

If it's me I don't need to be home! I deliver to myself at the post office!

[HeatherWake]

If it's me I don't need to be home! I deliver to myself at the post office!

What a wicked deal that is!! My mail guy doesnt bring stuff to my house...he delivers a card to my mailbox at the end of my street, and then I have to wait til the next day to go get it from the post office! :-(

[julesie-pie]

Tasha, awesome wrapping! DD looks sweet, and so does Pooh DS! Were they betrothed to each other? I forget? It was a whirlwind of matchmaking activity! I dont even remember if I pawned off my 14yr old DD...I KNOW my 23 yr old son is still up for grabs for one very lucky girl! Shmee?? He's great with kids!! :D

BUDDY UPDATE: Your parcel is now scheduled for delivery in two days!!! Are you gonna be home on thursday?

Are you my buddy? I will be home Thursday morning but my mailman usually comes about the time I leave to take DD to nursery school!

So after 5 stores I have finally tracked down a playmobil school bus for DD! Ya so excites & relieved!

I learned two of the most amazing things today! For those who have rode previous package trains you know that I have been having trouble with my landlady. Well our building is now on the green bin program, so I went to get my bin today while my friend watched DD (because I dont like to bring DD with me anymore). So when I asked her for the bin she told me that the police said she is not allowed to talk to me or my daughter anymore!!! I said 'ok, but does that mean I don't get a green bin then?', she just repeated that she is not allowed to talk to me so I left. When my friend was leaving she said she was going to go ask my landlady for a bin on my behalf, but when we opened the door it was sitting on my mat. So happy I don't have to deal with anymore of her bullsh*t!

The second thing I learned was that a neighbour on the third floor who was also being harrassed by her & the other owners, made a formal complaint to the tentancy board, had a trial & won so they can't talk to her either!

Sent from my SGH-T999V using Tapatalk 2

[becky_j]

Tasha, awesome wrapping! DD looks sweet, and so does Pooh DS! Were they betrothed to each other? I forget? It was a whirlwind of matchmaking activity! I dont even remember if I pawned off my 14yr old DD...I KNOW my 23 yr old son is still up for grabs for one very lucky girl! Shmee?? He's great with kids!! :D

BUDDY UPDATE: Your parcel is now scheduled for delivery in two days!!! Are you gonna be home on thursday?

I am usually home still on mat leave and dont go back to work till jan. so always here for the mail

[scbpooh]

Hugs pooh!



I have to agree with Heather too! I know that when I was younger if my parents demanded something from me I only fought back harder and would purposely try to hurt them and me in the process because I wasn't meeting up to their expectations or mine. But, then when I was left alone and was able to make my own decisions and was asked what I would like to do about the situation it was a different story. I felt like they weren't pressuring me into doing anything. I was also very dramatic. I am not anymore! lol

It isn't you that has lost her way it is your DD.... she just needs some time and the advice from Heather I think is the best!

Sorry if I shouldn't have said anything! I hope it is okay!

I totally get what your saying, everyone, but shes been gone since Oct.27 and now she has basically told me shes not going to be home for Christmas!!! I mean if it was any other time of year I dont think it would be so bad. But I am a person who is HUGE on family being together expecially at Christmas time. Christmas for me is the one time of year that I value family the most, even if we dont all get along we tolerate each other because its Christmas! For her not to be there, I jsut sit here and wonder, if her bff's family going to take her to their family's activities? Is she going to be alone sitting at their house while they are with their family? Ive never not had my kids with me at this time and never (even when they grown up) thought it would be possible that they wouldnt want to be with us during the holidays! Maybe my family values are just too high! I mean hell, if becky_j is coming into the city (we live about 45 mins apart) she knows they HAVE to come over and visit!!! I would be totally hurt and crushed if they didnt come and she knows this Even hubby said last night that if shes not home by Chrostmas hes not sure how hes going to be able to face his family seeing they're all talking to her and babying her but yet no one will talk to us about anything!

[tasha313]

You put in a lot of background work Tasha, reading posts etc.... Im sure your buddy will love it!

Aw thanks honey fluff

[HeatherWake]

I totally get what your saying, everyone, but shes been gone since Oct.27 and now she has basically told me shes not going to be home for Christmas!!! I mean if it was any other time of year I dont think it would be so bad. But I am a person who is HUGE on family being together expecially at Christmas time. Christmas for me is the one time of year that I value family the most, even if we dont all get along we tolerate each other because its Christmas! For her not to be there, I jsut sit here and wonder, if her bff's family going to take her to their family's activities? Is she going to be alone sitting at their house while they are with their family? Ive never not had my kids with me at this time and never (even when they grown up) thought it would be possible that they wouldnt want to be with us during the holidays! Maybe my family values are just too high! I mean hell, if becky_j is coming into the city (we live about 45 mins apart) she knows they HAVE to come over and visit!!! I would be totally hurt and crushed if they didnt come and she knows this Even hubby said last night that if shes not home by Chrostmas hes not sure how hes going to be able to face his family seeing they're all talking to her and babying her but yet no one will talk to us about anything!

Okay darlin Pooh...again with some tough love, straight talk advice here. Let her be. So WHAT is she doesnt have an awesome time at Xmas, sitting alone at their house...GOOD! It will make her realize that FAMILY is what is important. Extend the invitation to her, that youd really like her to come spend the night Xmas Eve (for your SONS sake, lets say) and open gifts and have dinner, blahblahblah. But honestly Pooh, she is trying to get away from the family, and you pleading with her, telling her that its xmas, and your kids need to be home, etc etc, is only going to push her further away! ESPECIALLY if shes trying to punish you for something! Act nonchalant, like its NOT killing you inside, which is why Id say come for xmas for the baby brothers sake.
Yes it hurts. Yes you feel like a failure as a mom. Yes its hard to deal with. Yes youre going to feel awful. Yes youll be missing her at Xmas, but dont make a huge deal. That will only serve to continue to keep her away, it will continue to harm the happiness of the REST of your immediate family too. There are OTHER PEOPLE in your house too...dont your husband and your son deserve to have a happy mom/wife for the holiday? Why make them feel like they arent enough? Smile for them. Honest to god Pooh...Ive been through it..both sides...doing it and having it done to me....She WILL come around, it WILL get better, this ISNT the end. You still HAVE a family, dont neglect the ones that are still there.
HUGS...LOVE YA!!!

[beckyrobinson1]

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[Norma Mackay-Rempel]

I am thinking that when my buddy receives her package I am not going to be able to wait for her to open up her prezzies! I am such a little kid!

[HeatherWake]

I am thinking that when my buddy receives her package I am not going to be able to wait for her to open up her prezzies! I am such a little kid!

I am thinking that when *I* receive my package I am not going to be able to wait to open the prezzies! I am ALSO such a little kid! Hahaha!