I'm sorry you were assaulted by some-one and hope that you will eventually go and report this crime against you, especially if you know or can identify the perpetator. Your actions had nothing to do with this crime..I hope the actions of these brave women change your mind. even if the statue of Limitations has past, your report may alert the polce in other cases of abuse.
Self-blaming is one of the ways that Rape Culture is still flourishing in all parts of the world.
It's worse when the victim is convinced that her/his actions are totally to blame and, horrors, force an otherwise innocent person to comit acts of violence against them.
As a culture we need, no HAVE to break this cycle. It shouldn't matter if some-one has a drink, wears reveaing clothes or isn't surrounded by Imperial Stormtroopers...
Sexual Harrassment, assault or rape is
NEVER EVER EVER the victims fault...it's the fault of the b@$tard who forced themelves onto some-one else..And only that person.
True but we can't alter how other people act against us. Especially when they knowingly and willingly commit an illegal act against our will on that most personal of possessions..our own body. Even when we tell that person
NO and they wantonly ignore and disreagard our voices.
True again since you delierately and knowingly broke the law of the land. General You deserve to be at fault.
But saying that an act you deliberately set out to do is the same as some-one violating your body against your will strikes me as totally victim blaming and shaming.
No worse than that....It's condemning the victim as at best a willing accompliace or at worst being the sole agent of this crime..It exonerates the criminal totally. and gives a president for others to claim that because you @i-forget blame yourself..then all other abuse victims should be tarred with the same brush. All victims are equally ot blame...all Abusers were forced to abuse.. because one person has spoken on the internet about her ordeal being her fault..
logic fail...going somewhere with some-one does not and never has given them rights over you and your body.
And how do we do this?? By pushing back on the victim-shaming and making the whiole process about the criminal who deserves to be named and shamed...
Rather than focusing on the personal and moral habits, the dress and location of the victim...Focus on the real offender...the cat-caller, the harrasser, the molester and the rapist.
Stop trying to blame the innocent party.
every-one...stop making judgments about people you don't know..
If you have ever been a victim of an assault..remember yours wsn't the experience of every-one else's assault...saying thier's wasn't as bad as yours or in any other way trying to deminish thier experience just hands power to those people who want to say any kind of Sexaul Assault is made up and isn't worth noting...
Please note i am well aware that unwanted sexual contact happens across the whole spectrum of sexul identity...from male/female to male/male to female/male to femal/female and all the other
QUILTBAG assaults.
eta We don't expect a mugging victmi to be guily of having money on them. Nor a car-jack victim of flashing off thier wheels in a public space..sexual crimes nearly aways end up as she/he was asking for IT somehow..