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Thu, Oct 30th, 2014, 09:32 PM #46
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I'm sorry for what you went thru, but I just can't believe that every woman who goes to a man 's room is thinking, 'if I get raped, oh well!'. NOTHING a woman does or says automatically gives a guy the carte blanch right to rape her.
I salute those women for coming out of the woodwork, now feeling there's strength in numbers, and their collective voices will be heard.
It just gave me the chills to read at least two of them relate him turning his teddy-bear's face to the wall so that it wouldn't see what he was about to do to them! It just disgusts me!
This twerp is looking more like a monster and less than the Demi-god women worshiped.Last edited by Lynn49; Thu, Oct 30th, 2014 at 09:34 PM.
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Thu, Oct 30th, 2014, 09:43 PM #47
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You expressed what I tried to say in my post beautifully, Darth!
If my daughter ever said to me that she deserved to be raped, had she been, there would be no way on earth I'd allow her to ever believe that! We don't walk around as victims! We don't offer ourselves up to a guy just because we're in his home, workplace or hotel room! Whoever did this to you, I_Forget, I hope never did that to another woman, but I'm not naive enough to think a guy like that stops at one such encounter. Like Darth, I hope you report him, but at the very least, please believe that you did NOTHING, NOTHING to warrant his behaviour.Last edited by Lynn49; Thu, Oct 30th, 2014 at 10:18 PM.
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Thu, Oct 30th, 2014, 10:15 PM #48
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And the Buffy The Vampire Slayer reference...For Teddy read Miss Edith
Short answer : no Long answer : NOOOOOOOOOOO!
Welcome to the Penguinocracy..One Penguin, One vote..I am The Penguin..I have the One Vote
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Thu, Oct 30th, 2014, 10:19 PM #49
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 08:45 AM #50
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is still terrible that women feel that they shouldn't bother
to report such awful things happening, but considering
jill amery's account i can see why,
(sorry if this a repost that someone else did)
www.huffingtonpost.ca/jill-amery/post_
had a problem with posting the article, sorry.
as a gender we have achieved a lot (as if we should have had to) - and it is too awful that as a society we have not.
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 09:37 AM #51
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 11:06 AM #52
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@i_forget I just want to take a minute to tip my hat off to you for coming to offer your personal perspective; you didn't have to but did anyway and that in itself is a step. *hugz*
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RRLF 2014 -> RENEE'S !!! Lactantia butter, Marc Angelo, Casa di Mama
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 11:47 AM #53
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Last edited by angel_2011; Sat, Nov 1st, 2014 at 11:39 AM.
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 12:08 PM #54
Reva Seth, a lawyer and author is now the ninth woman to accuse Jian of assault.
http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/reva-se..._hp_ref=canada
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 01:27 PM #55
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Just wanted to clarify something.
I do not believe that a woman that is raped is at "fault".
I think what my point was rather that we have no idea what lurks behind the corner, what another person is thinking or feeling, or what is going to happen when we accept that invitation to someone's home for a drink.
Because we do not know, people should exercise caution so that they are not put into potentially dangerous situations.
We tell our kids to not to talk to strangers, to not play in the road...we should be teaching women to think about the potential risks associated with "going up for a drink" as well.Love like crazy everyday and smile.
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 06:58 PM #56
Instead of teaching women (or men) to be more aware of their actions if they are the victim, the issue is actually teaching men (or women) to not rape or sexually assault others. This topic infuriates me because in most of the women's account of Jian's actions towards them, they never came forward earlier because they said they chose to go out with this man. Sure the women agreed to go on dates or whatever, but the problem is it was never their choice to be assaulted.
Saying that women should be more cautious is the same as saying women can't wear short skirts because we are asking for men's attention. The blame needs to be taken away from women who do end up in these abusive situations.
Sorry for my heated post. I've noticed on social media posts, many ignorant people are blaming the women who came forward. Of course not everyone is ignorant, but I wonder why victim-blaming is even a 'thing'.
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 07:33 PM #57
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Very true, maiyuu - but one thing, too - as the week has gone by and more information has come out, this whole thing also changed from what it 'seemed' in the beginning (which was just one man's proclivities with BDSM and questions of whether meetings were consensual).
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 07:45 PM #58
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The sad part about all of this is that we do not have control over the actions of others. We only have control over our actions and our choices.
We live in a society that is very sexualized by the mass media.
In order to teach others to not do these things, society needs to change how they look at sex.Love like crazy everyday and smile.
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Fri, Oct 31st, 2014, 09:27 PM #59
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Toronto police are starting an investigation after 2 of the women camee forward to police.
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/...ick=sf_globefb
And on the subject of blame, I really hope that as CBC's internal investigation moves ahead... that Arif Noorani will at the very least lose his job for the way he dealt and enabled the one CBC employee who tried to voice her concerns over being harassed.
"[The executive producer's] comment to me was …’He’s never going to change, you’re a malleable person, let’s talk about how you can make this a less toxic work environment for you,”
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RRLF 2014 -> RENEE'S !!! Lactantia butter, Marc Angelo, Casa di Mama
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Sat, Nov 1st, 2014, 01:03 AM #60
Has anyone seen the video games out there? Murder, rape and mayhem are "GAMES".
I think you can expect to see a lot worse in the future. This case is sexual violence, but look at these kids that go on shooting sprees and the one-of "terrorist acts" we've been seeing.
Movies, tv and media glorify violence and sexualize women in the extreme. Young minds are being completely saturated and bombarded with this 24/7. Really. . .can we expect them all just to rise above it?
Instead of being guided by morals, principles and what's good for the majority, commercial industry is solely motivated on greed and appealing to people's most base desires.
That said, on the other side of the world, crazy fanaticism, thirst for power, love of violence and debasing women is also an art of it's own.
Does this ever make you wonder. . . why is this happening?Last edited by MortgageQueen; Sat, Nov 1st, 2014 at 01:04 AM.
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