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Thread: I'm in a bad mood about a lot of things!

  1. #1
    mandolinatou
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    Firstly I hate my daughters school. I am so curious about the rest of canada. I moved to canada after completed my B.A. My mental framework for how school works has been abruptly adjusted. In Quebec with the commission scholar de montreal (French school system in Montreal) my daughter goes to a small school without a cafeteria. So they can only have packed lunches. You can never buy or preorder a lunch. Furthermore she has 2 days of hot lunch, these are days where her tupperware can be heated up. The rest of the time she has to have cold lunch. She does not like sandwiches and so this is challenging. We have to pay for lunch time care giver services. We don't qualify for bus services because we are 100 meters too close to the backside of the school, not the entry. She has to go to school two days a week dressed for gym and if we forget lord forbid, we have to go back home, because she can't leave her gym clothing at the school. We had to buy 80 dollars worth of very specific supplies for kindergarten and pay 30 dollars directly to the school for school supplies. We are expected to buy stupid **** for expensive prices like ugly child fabricated reusable bags for 10 dollars each and christmas cards from recycled paper made by kindergartners for 2.50 each. What happened to selling chocolate? They want parents to come into the classroom every week. Who has time for that if they are working full time? We aren't all teachers with ample vacation days. I swear they think we are back in the 1950s. Furthermore they have pedogical days every month which are days where teachers don't work, they think about working and we have to pay extra for those days. We pay for morning service and an evening service because kindergarten is still a half day. Is it crazy or am I a whiner? Isn't public school supposed to be free? How can they not have lunch cooked on site or a gym locker? How do people manage everything?

    Honestly with two parents who work full time, my commute is 3 hours a day and my husbands is two hours a day: we struggle just to try to keep the house clean, the car in order, the kid stocked appropriately, it all comes across a bit much to me. So then I had a minor break down as I left BMO today. I hate BMO at the moment. Or well the fact that they won't just transfer my RRSP mutual fund to a RRSP savings account. I went for an appointment for a mistake they made last year and while I knew it was thursday in my head, it was in my blackberry for today. Somehow I thought today was both Thursday and Friday. Except I know how I thought that. I am so busy mentally remembering appointments for school, hot lunch and cold lunch, gym days and non gym days, work and medical care appointments for everyone that I have no ****ing mental space to make bank appointments 3 weeks in advance. Why can't they handle a short request quickly? I threw a small hissy fit there and told them I want to take all my money with me, not knowing what bank will be any better. At my branch they make you wait 35 minutes to see the teller only to wait another 3 weeks to get an in branch appointment, they'll waste my time for 45 minutes telling me how it is better to buy and hold and then tell me they can't operate such a complicated transaction in the branch. It is not better to buy and hold in this economy with a 3.5% MER. I have no mental space to remember telephone banking codes. I don't know where would be better but I can't tolerate this ****.

    The metro broke down this morning too so I was late to work. Some lunatic was walking on the track this morning which slowed us by 20 minutes, only to have some sort of rechargeable battery not recharge slowing us another 5-10 minutes. When this happens the metro gets so back and some jerk keeps his giant backpack on and wops you with it unavoidably. I keep thinking about reaching into that backpack and pulling things out of it and throwing it on the ground. I am so tired of the metro at the moment.

    I hate living in the east side of town. The love of learning a new language has turned into despise.

    My favorite thing about living here is this amazing and cheap chinese massage place that has vastly improved my quality life. They allow me to just walk in and get great 30 minute massages that lengthens my commute by the massage time only. Last week though the massage table was covered in phlegm and it was so green I thought initially it was left over massage cream. I took a tissue to wipe off what I thought was a huge dollop of massage cream and realized immediately what it was. I tried to explain that it was dirty and should be sanitized but they only speak chinese. I was in a hurry to get my kid from school and so I just replaced the face covers after I cleaned it which was a mistake because now I have a cold. Furthermore for the first time ever the owner was rude to me completely unrelated to the phlegm issue...and I am a very good customer who always tips well and is always polite. I don't want to go back there and literally it is the only thing I like about this side of town. I moved here to be forced to speak french and live near my mother in law. She died. I speak as much french as I am going to but I am not sure we can afford a remotely similar place in the west and anglo side of town.

    In the states they offer better customer service, lower bank fees, better school services, less school related fees, fewer expenses for kindergartners, reduced stress on the parents. They'd see me right away at a bank, even if I was a lunatic who didn't know what day it was. I am way too smart, too educated and good at my job to paid such a ****ty salary and have to live in the ****ty side of town, with ****ty bank service, ****ty school service. My husbands francophone and would deal with these issues if we move west. I would make so much more money though. I really want to move. So thats my series of complaints. I realize I might be a frustrated and overwhelmed jerk but thats me today. If anyone can comment on schools and banking services I would appreciate it.

    This thread is currently associated with: Metro
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  2. #2
    Smart Canuck r0c0upons's Avatar
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    first of all, take a deep breath, woman!!!


    breathe in!!!
    .....breathe out!!!!

    focus in on what you DO want. filter out ALLLLLLLL the crap. i know that might seem hard, but honestly you can't NOT do it at this point.

    you want things to work out with your daughter's school
    you want things to work out with your commute
    you want things to work out with your work
    you want to feel relief

    take another deep breath

    take on a mantra, something short and sweet

    "things work out for me!!!"

    even if you don't think its true right now, "fake it till you make it". say it right now. "things work out for me!"

    say it before you go to bed, when you wake up, and a few times throughout the day.
    remind yourself that you don't need to solve ALL of these things right now
    but you DO need to take care of yourself

    just take it one moment at a time, and breathe.

    things will work out for you, i promise!
    “Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.”

    -Henry Ford

  3. #3
    Smart Canuck
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    It must feel good to get that off your chest!
    Move to the Ontario side
    I agree about the job salary scale. I am nearing the completion of my degree and have been looking for employment. I've been looking across the country and in QC, the same job pays several thousands of dollars less (and at times, it's in the 10s of thousands, depending on the position). Add to that the higher taxes, and it doesn't justify even stepping foot in the province.
    I think quality of life is tremendously important. Life shouldn't be a struggle every inch of the way.
    Unfortunately, I can't provide any input on banks/schools, but I hope things look up for you!
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    Wow! That is a whole lot of frustration. I'm sorry you are feeling so ****ty about things lately.

    If it makes you feel even the slightest bit better, I stepped in a big pile of dog **** today and ruined my favourite shoes. They are now in the dumpster behind my work.

  5. #5
    Smart Canuck LisaLisaBoBisa's Avatar
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    Wow! Glad you got that all out..

    Firstly, BMO sucks everywhere.. I started with them last year and they pretty well suck.. Longest lineups ever if I have a cash transaction.

    I also can't get a bus service for my Ds here in Toronto because his school only has approval for special needs - no buses for commuters..

    I'd love to kick the backpacks - like just lift my leg and kick them. I have started to say things to people - which might suggest I am crazy lady.. I will say "that's ok no need to move, I'll jump 6 feet over the top of your head".. or "No don't worry, I'm only a pregnant woman, but you go ahead and sit down since you're a man and all"..

    It's fun.. Or sometimes when I find ppl staring at me really blatantly, I'll open my eyes really wide at them - I'm tempted to stick my tongue out too.

    And not a single hot lunch at Ds school - BUT I have discovered a thermos will keep soups and things like pasta hot until lunch time.. Hope that helps..

  6. #6
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    (((((hugs)))))
    Take a deep breath. Everything will turn out alright.
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  7. #7
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    What an awful time you've been having! So glad you let it all out

    Your daughter's school sounds exactly like the school I grew up at. I don't know if its still the case there but this was my experience:

    School

    -small school. No cafeteria. packed lunch sandwiches every day were sickening.
    To this day, I eat them maybe once every few months when I am forced. My dad would come to school once in a while in the winter on -30 days (they never kept us inside during cold alerts) and bring us a hot lunch. I'd look out the window to see if he was there and then go have lunch with him in the car haha. Sad the hoops you have to jump through just to give your kid lunch

    -no bus.

    - had to go to school two days a week dressed for gym because we couldn't leave our clothes at school. I guess the teachers didn't want to stay late so instead of detention, the school's punishment was to remove your exercise

    - had to pay exorbitant fees for stupid things (I think this is a right of passage at every school). We never sold chocolate.

    - parents only came to see teachers maybe twice a year. Your school is expecting way too much, who has the time to go once a week?

    - the pedagogical days were the norm. We called them PD or PA days.


    This was the Toronto Catholic School Board

    the banks,

    from my experience with two of them, they are awful. Especially the one who keeps screwing up our transactions. It is a PITA going all the way to city hall to show proof of payment for your bill because the bank screwed up.

    Have you looked into credit unions? I was a Desjardins customer for many years before they pulled out of Toronto. Sad to see them go. No fuss, no muss, no errors, low or non-existant fees

    Public transit

    is awful everywhere. It takes me 1 hour to go to work. It's 5 kilometres away. It goes FOUR KILOMETRES AN HOUR. And we have to dodge elbows or smelly people in our face every few minutes. Or wait out in the cold half an hour just to get o n the bus because four of them have short turned.

    Make sure you tell the dude with the backpack in your face to take it off. I do. People need to start standing up to public transit rudeness or it will get worse.

    Re: the crappy salary and crappy jobs:

    this is what QC and ON have become. I have a masters degree and thought it would give me job security (I hate school but did it anyway because I wanted the security). I worked on contracts for 7 years. You're not the only one, we are all in this together.


    The difference between here and USA is that Americans have much more competition. There's "Bank of I felt like opening a bank" down there. Here in some industries, companies know that you don't have a lot of choice so they don't have to bend over backwards for your business

    I hope you feel better and that these posts can help you see you're not losing your mind (I feel that way sometimes. How can people be so messed up? It has to be me overreacting, right?). Well, it's not you
    Last edited by torontogal12; Sat, Dec 6th, 2014 at 09:12 AM.
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    I was going to post my rant about my Black Friday deal disasters,but after reading your rant mine would seem like a brag!!! Sorry all this is happening to you, try and think positive..You don't say where you are originally from, but it must have been worse were you lived before for you to move to Canada!!I love Canada, I know were're not perfect, no place is, but it's a lot better than a lot of other countries!!
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  9. #9
    mandolinatou
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    Quote Originally Posted by SavvyLady View Post
    I was going to post my rant about my Black Friday deal disasters,but after reading your rant mine would seem like a brag!!! Sorry all this is happening to you, try and think positive..You don't say where you are originally from, but it must have been worse were you lived before for you to move to Canada!!I love Canada, I know were're not perfect, no place is, but it's a lot better than a lot of other countries!!
    You should totally rant its not a competition its just ranting.

    There are things going well in my life too. I just got off contract work two fridays ago...first time since I moved here. I am really good at my job even if it pays crappy it's a nice job. I was just super frustrated...not to mention embarrassed that I thought yesterday was two days of the week. I wrote that message, took a long walk in the cold and went to bed. I feel like a million bucks this morning so thanks for letting me vent.

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    Quote Originally Posted by mandolinatou View Post
    You should totally rant its not a competition its just ranting.

    There are things going well in my life too. I just got off contract work two fridays ago...first time since I moved here. I am really good at my job even if it pays crappy it's a nice job. I was just super frustrated...not to mention embarrassed that I thought yesterday was two days of the week. I wrote that message, took a long walk in the cold and went to bed. I feel like a million bucks this morning so thanks for letting me vent.
    I'm glad you're feeling better..we all have days like you had!!!

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    I stopped reading 1/2 way through your first paragraph. I am a teacher in Saskatchewan and am offended by part of your comments already. Teachers on contracts do NOT have ample days or time to take off work to provide support in their child's classroom. I am currently a substitute teacher and teach as many days as possible in order to pay my bills. Not having a cafeteria in the school is very typical in my province. I hope you figure out something to make you feel better, but I'm personally going to continue on with my day.
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    So glad you are feeling better. My kids are in college now. It seems as though is still working like they did when most kids had a parent at home and they could walk there. When I was growing up I usually went to my grandparents for lunch (70s). When I couldn't go there my parents really had to argue so I could eat my sandwich there...glad I don't have to worry about it anymore.

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    Smart Canuck frugal50's Avatar
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    you should be grateful that U are living in Canada!!

    it could be worse, if U were still in the US
    You can't change other people. You can only change yourself"
    - H. H. Getter

    when we change our attitude, we change our lives





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    Canadian PR!!! GoddessDigi's Avatar
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    I do wish Canada was more like the US, in regards to the cafeteria..
    I grew up in the US, for the majority of my school years (all but 1 or 2, really), and all my schools had cafeterias (which provide lunch,m if you so choose). We had pizza days, as well..and you got breakfast AND lunch.. So much easier.. Maybe not as healthy, all the time, but probably healthier for the majority, since some parents can only pack quick things, not perishables..

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    I never had a cafeteria in school until I went to high school in Grade 8. There were hot lunch days at grade school, organized by the parents association.

    I did the hotlunch days at my childrens schools when they were small.

    Have you gone to any parents association events to see if changes can be made?

    Just be glad you have access to universal healthcare and the fact that Quebec has the cheapest childcare in Canada.

    Do Americans have monthly child tax benefit cheques?
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