Vinyl 95.3

[Babygirl1]

Music Challenge - Writing for a music magazine

[Babygirl1]

Sunday 10th July

Trivia

Could you graduate from 4th grade? - Ontario
Games 'n eCards Trivia - 10
Music Challenge - Writing for a music magazine
Name that question - What is the Suez Canal?
Sports Trivia - 2004
This Day In Canadian History - Dance of the Happy Shades

[Babygirl1]

[Babygirl1]

[edwards1411]

Attachment 62237

[Babygirl1]

MURDER AT WOOLWORTHS

Tired of constantly
being broke & stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed.

A 'friend of a friend'
put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000.



The
husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar bill that rested inside.
Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.



A few
days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Woolworths Supermarket store. There, he surprised her in the produce department & proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath & slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.



However,
unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras & observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave
the store.

Under intense
questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.

The next day in the
newspaper, the headline declared...

(You're
going to hate me for this...)

'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ WOOLWORTHS

[Babygirl1]

[Babygirl1]

What! No E-mail?

An unemployed man goes to apply for a job with Microsoft as a janitor. The manager there arranges for him to take an aptitude test (Section: Floors, sweeping and cleaning).

After the test, the manager says, "You will be employed at minimum wage, $5.25 an hour. Let me have your e-mail address, so that I can send you a form to complete and tell you where to report for work on your first day. Taken aback, the man protests that he has neither a computer nor an e-mail address. To this the MS manager replies, "Well, then, that means that you virtually don't exist and can therefore hardly expect to be employed."

Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having only $10 in his wallet, he decides to buy a 25 lb. flat of tomatoes at the supermarket. Within less than 2 hours, he sells all the tomatoes individually at 100% profit.

Repeating the process several times more that day, he ends up with almost $100 before going to sleep that night.

And thus it dawns on him that he could quite easily make a living selling tomatoes. Getting up early every day and going to bed late, he multiplies his profits quickly. After a short time he acquires a cart to transport several dozen boxes of tomatoes, only to have to trade it in again so that he can buy a pick-up truck to support his expanding business.

By the end of the second year, he is the owner of a fleet of pick-up trucks and manages a staff of a hundred former unemployed people, all selling tomatoes. Planning for the future of his wife and children, he decides to buy some life insurance. Consulting with an insurance
adviser, he picks an insurance plan. At the end of the telephone conversation, the adviser asks him for his e-mail address in order to send the final documents electronically.
When the man replies that he has no e-mail, the adviser is stunned, "What, you don't have e-mail? How on earth have you managed to amass such wealth without the Internet, e-mail and e-commerce? Just imagine where you would be now, if you had been connected to the internet from the very start!" After a moment of thought, the tomato millionaire replied, "Why, of course! I would be a floor cleaner at Microsoft!"

Moral of this story:

1. The Internet, e-mail and e-commerce do not need to rule your life.

2. If you don't have e-mail, but work hard, you can still become a millionaire.

3. Seeing that you got this story via e-mail, you're probably closer to becoming a janitor than you are to becoming a millionaire.

4. If you do have a computer and e-mail, you have already been taken to the cleaners by Microsoft.

[Babygirl1]

Beatles Computer Song - Let It Be

When I find my code in tons of trouble,
Friends and colleagues come to me,
Speaking words of wisdom:
Write in C.
As the deadline fast approaches,
And bugs are all that I can see,
Somewhere, someone whispers:
Write in C.
Write in C, write in C,
Write in C, oh, write in C.
LOGO's dead and buried,
Write in C.
I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,
For science it worked flawlessly.
Try using it for graphics!
Write in C.
If you've just spent nearly 30 hours,
Debugging some assembly,
Soon you will be glad to
Write in C.
Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, yeah, Write in C.
BASIC's not the answer.
Write in C.
Write in C, Write in C
Write in C, oh, Write in C.
Pascal won't quite cut it.
Write in C.

[Babygirl1]

Confucius Says

Confucius Says:

War does not determine who's right. War determine who's left.

Man who sleeps on road, wakes up feeling run down.

Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out."

A bird in hand makes hard to blow nose.

When called an idiot sometimes is better to be quiet, than open mouth and remove all doubt.

Marriage is like game of poker. You start with pair and end with full house.

He who thinks only of number one must remember this number is next to nothing
Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.

People who make Confucius joke speak bad English.

[Babygirl1]

[Babygirl1]

This Day in Canadian History - Quebec

[Babygirl1]

Discover Something New II Trivia - linseed oil

[Babygirl1]

Discover Something New Trivia - Soak them in soapy water.

[Babygirl1]

HowStuffWorks II Trivia - gallons