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Thread: Chronic Pain Management Support Group

  1. #421
    Proud Canadian dealsniffer's Avatar
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    hello sherrall-I am just interested to know what you have that you know you have been there. I am very curious. Everyone's stuff is different and you can not claim to know exactly what a person is going through and what is going to help. My pain has to do with my spine-I had two major surgeries and I am doing alot to get better. For me the pool is not beneficial because I need to regain strength. I also need to relearn how to move because my body no longer moves the way other people's bodies move. Most of my spine is fused together and does not move. I am just wondering if you know about what that is like and you have been there done that too? If so-what are your suggestions with that? I am curious. Also I do not take pain killers unless absolutely neccessary. People wonder how but I have pill free ways of trying to deal with pain also. I would also like to make a friendly suggestion that people may take offense to being told to quit whining and will be less likely to listen to what you have to offer. Just a suggestion. Also since you have been through this stuff you obviously know the struggles of doing simple daily activities such as getting dressed and you understand that it is not always easy and sometimes you need an outlet to vent and people to listen. You must understand that this thread is here so that people can do that while trying to get through each day and doing what we all can to improve our lives. You must also understand that just because we "whine" does not mean we are doing nothing to improve our quality of life either. I completely agree that sometimes pain killers are not the best but sometimes we need them just to manage to do things that we need to in order to improve our quality of life. I am wondering if you have had to relearn how to walk too?
    Last edited by dealsniffer; Sun, Oct 18th, 2009 at 05:37 PM.
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  2. #422
    Canadian Genius Skippy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dealsniffer View Post
    hello sherrall-I am just interested to know what you have that you know you have been there. I am very curious. Everyone's stuff is different and you can not claim to know exactly what a person is going through and what is going to help. My pain has to do with my spine-I had two major surgeries and I am doing alot to get better. For me the pool is not beneficial because I need to regain strength. I also need to relearn how to move because my body no longer moves the way other people's bodies move. Most of my spine is fused together and does not move. I am just wondering if you know about what that is like and you have been there done that too? If so-what are your suggestions with that? I am curious. Also I do not take pain killers unless absolutely neccessary. People wonder how but I have pill free ways of trying to deal with pain also. I would also like to make a friendly suggestion that people may take offense to being told to quit whining and will be less likely to listen to what you have to offer. Just a suggestion. Also since you have been through this stuff you obviously know the struggles of doing simple daily activities such as getting dressed and you understand that it is not always easy and sometimes you need an outlet to vent and people to listen. You must understand that this thread is here so that people can do that while trying to get through each day and doing what we all can to improve our lives. You must also understand that just because we "whine" does not mean we are doing nothing to improve our quality of life either. I completely agree that sometimes pain killers are not the best but sometimes we need them just to manage to do things that we need to in order to improve our quality of life. I am wondering if you have had to relearn how to walk too?
    Well said,the first post in this thread states to vent,encourage and support one another,not to judge nor label.

  3. #423
    coupon skank emeritus mcminsen's Avatar
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    You guys are amazing. I've been reading (lurking) on this thread for quite a while now and I KNOW that I still don't even have more than a small idea of all that you're all coping with. Your patience and fortitude is humbling.

    I've been through many years of life challenging illness and I know what it's like to wake up every morning for months on end thinking "Oh no, not back to this nightmare again." I am very fortunate to have gotten well again but I do remember how it can wear your spirit down to be so sick for so long. My late partner's last few years were with unrelenting pain but we coped somehow. I know how valuable peer support can be and this discussion thread is a really good thing.

    dealsniffer and andit, your responses to that certain someone who "knows" so much really reveals your fortitude and strength. I don't know how you resisted the temptation to "let 'er rip!". You sorta did but with so much calm and dignified good temper. The sheer arrogance of telling you to stop "whining"! I better stop now, suffice to say that if any of you need a fierce advocate, I'm here.

    I will continue to drop in and try to keep tabs on how you're all doing. I wish you continued strength and support. Also to those who you interact with, whether they be close family and friends, doctors, fellow Smartcanuckers or just strangers. Just keep on keepin' on. I'd like to say "Have a nice day" but it seems so glib, so I'll just say "Have a day!" Take care and ciao 4 now.

    P.S. - skippy, I'll try to send a few bald eagles your way to keep you company.

  4. #424
    shameus
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    ok you want to know whats wrong with me 15 yrs ago i hurt my back very badly
    to the point i couldnt move and with physo I almost stop walking.. along came firbro malgian (spelling isnt the greatest at this time of the morning) then 5 years ago when we purchased our dream house etc with in 4 months i was told i had breast cancer zip there goes a year plus out of my life with chemo radition and still my bones and muscele were killing me ,,, i lost my hair etc no big deal got on with my life went back into swim classes to loosen up those muscele that had shrunk you have to move and make them muscele go back to what they were.
    a year and half ago i got out of the shower and looked at my toes not bending and dam i broke a rib called my doctor and was in to see her that day... my cancer had come back i now have bone cancer and lung lynode cancer i have a bone cancer treatment every month its now been changed after one year to 4 times a year
    i have a cat scan every 3 months to see if my cancer has spread...
    on my last scan 1 month ago my lungs have gotten worse... yes I am terminal i have maybe 3 yrs left if that
    so yes i do have every right to tell you to quit whinning i been there and done it and i have seen first had what warm water can do for the body ... dont sit around letting
    back pain, leg pain manage your life you must manage your life, dont depend on pills
    everyone's pain level is different but this is it for you for life is this what you want when i know and have seen first hand what warm water can do for people like you who didnt like me telling you to quit whinning, any doctor who knows anything will tell you if you mention warm water in a pool they know ... yes you will still have a few bad days but not like it use to be and you will feel better getting out
    so again quit whinning pain is real but you can do something for it move your body
    so do i have the right to tell you to quit whinning probaly not but im going to since you have a life to live and i wont for long you dont here me whinning oh what am i going to do for the next few years and this is the first time this list has ever heard that i have termial cancer some of my best friends dont even know... so i know you can do something about yourself I cant so quit whinning and get your together
    sherrrall

  5. #425
    Cat Trainer (Trainee??) Andit's Avatar
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    Sorry you have to go through this (yes, pretty lame I know, but what else is there to say?).

    I've tried to live my life with a judge not lest ye be judged mentality. Do I get frustrated when my whiny neighbour who cries over a scratch starts complaining? Yep, but I also keep in mind that one person's pain is a mild discomfort to another.

    I'm very very lucky to still be alive & kicking. Have no clue why, actually, since there's nothing terribly special about me. I was given a second chance (& third & fourth, actually I'm not sure which of my 9 lives I'm on now) & I'm grateful for it. Doesn't mean my life is easy, though.

    I'm glad that swimming works for you. It's not really an option for me, since public pools are not a good idea for someone without an immune system. My friend's pool sometimes works, but since I can't swim, I just splash around in the shallow end, which annoys the neighbours who do laps. Never been big on water, but if I thought it would make a difference, I'd do it.

    What works for me is gentle yoga exercises. Doesn't work for all. In fact, many of the moves are beyond my capabilities, no matter how "easy" the instructor insists they are.

    I also had to relearn how to walk (spent time in a wheelchair) & 2 yrs of physio did very little to strengthen me & allow me to walk like I used to. I was out of the chair, but a little walk just about did me in. My legs would collapse after half a dozen steps. What turned my life around & helped me relearn to walk was my dog. & while I can't imagine life without a pet, I don't believe it's the solution for all.

    You did make a very important point, thank you for reminding me to make the most of life. I'm going to do just that in a little while - I'm off to spend time with my parents.

    I hope everyone has at least one moment of happiness in their life today.

    For a smile, see our vids: http://www.youtube.com/lilyquincy

  6. #426
    coupon skank emeritus mcminsen's Avatar
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    sherrall, I'm sorry for your situation and now I might have a better idea of where your power comes from. Your previous post (#419) when seen by itself really does kinda hit a sour note. It was just the tone, but I guess you have the right to blow it out there.

    Can we be a little more gentle? There's no sense in us wasting our energy on blasting away even if it does give someone some relief. I believe you are a fierce advocate, too.

    I'll try to understand you as I find out more, as I hope you will learn more about the others. A loving kick in the pants can be good, but not too hard. I wish you well.

  7. #427
    Canadian Genius Skippy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mcminsen View Post
    You guys are amazing. I've been reading (lurking) on this thread for quite a while now and I KNOW that I still don't even have more than a small idea of all that you're all coping with. Your patience and fortitude is humbling.

    I've been through many years of life challenging illness and I know what it's like to wake up every morning for months on end thinking "Oh no, not back to this nightmare again." I am very fortunate to have gotten well again but I do remember how it can wear your spirit down to be so sick for so long. My late partner's last few years were with unrelenting pain but we coped somehow. I know how valuable peer support can be and this discussion thread is a really good thing.

    dealsniffer and andit, your responses to that certain someone who "knows" so much really reveals your fortitude and strength. I don't know how you resisted the temptation to "let 'er rip!". You sorta did but with so much calm and dignified good temper. The sheer arrogance of telling you to stop "whining"! I better stop now, suffice to say that if any of you need a fierce advocate, I'm here.

    I will continue to drop in and try to keep tabs on how you're all doing. I wish you continued strength and support. Also to those who you interact with, whether they be close family and friends, doctors, fellow Smartcanuckers or just strangers. Just keep on keepin' on. I'd like to say "Have a nice day" but it seems so glib, so I'll just say "Have a day!" Take care and ciao 4 now.

    P.S. - skippy, I'll try to send a few bald eagles your way to keep you company.
    Thank you for your encouraging words,I'm sorry about the loss of your partner.

  8. #428
    Canadian Genius Skippy's Avatar
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    That you may know Grace and Peace in your own situation.
    That you may know some relief from pain,which can be overwhelming at times.
    That you have the strength for each day,knowing what is important.
    Lastly that you know there are others who really do care.

  9. #429
    Smart Canuck tidytaurus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Skippy View Post
    That you may know Grace and Peace in your own situation.
    That you may know some relief from pain,which can be overwhelming at times.
    That you have the strength for each day,knowing what is important.
    Lastly that you know there are others who really do care.

    Skippy this is why I have taken part in this thread, thank you.

  10. #430
    shameus
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    hey guys if you ever heard me talk in the so call tones that i wrote that first message you would be killing your self laughing.... not kidding my facial expessions cant come across the net so when you read my tones as you call it dont take them to heart only if i call you by name and tell you to pull up your panties!!

    when is I saw that some one did wii i just cringed, because we both knew you over did it.... but ... we cant help ourselves
    so back to the water... i cant swim either well maybe 6 ft however... warm water does make a difference and it has to be warm and you dont have to splash around there are certain excerises to loose the load if pain

    im am very aware of your type of back surgery , and leg problems
    what maybe not explained to you is this
    there is a cord that runs from your lower back and runs down both legs if you allow this sucker to shrink you are going to have a lot of leg pain and to undo it takes a while so someone in your condition for leg pain will take up to about 3 months at 3 times a week to have it stopped how ever your back pain not so simple, you have to learn to relax and that the word here relax the mus. tissue your going to move it and thats all you need to do is move it and of course its going to hurt like hell not kidding but again if its done in warm water and the movements are so very simple but you must keep your body under water from part neck down once you get that sucker moving you have it made and on to the next muscle

    I have seen water works i have seen a gal who cant handle shoes on her feet due to fallen arches and had to have all her shoes padded gesh when i saw them i almost cried but within 6 months i have to say she was removing the padding slowly and then into a different shoe and within the year she was jogging in the pool
    making the muscle move takes time, if you are a jogger do you go out and start running no you do warm ups well this is the same way
    I know what water can do its not a quick fix but it certainly stops a lot of pain
    headaches, meds, and one can loose weight in the water of course we gain weight when we are in pain, we eat anything we get our hands on to get the dam meds down so they will work with food and not upset our stomach gosh only knows we dont need another problem so we grab anything in food chips, etc to wash the pills down ...
    I do feel for people who have lepus this is a dieses thats not kind to the body and they do suffer but again its a well known fact water works for them
    Im not seeing you as in person but listening to you whine again !!!being humerous as a toad on butterfly taking an express flight to Japan... I know warm water will work and not cool or cold it makes the musc. shrink up ... getting back on my bandstand here after falling off ducking the butter fly after listening to you and your temperment etc you really do need warm water movements warm water will not hurt you hot and cool cold will ideal water temp is 98 your body temp is 99 if memory is right ...or is it the other way a round on numbers
    i have seen a lot worse than you girl and i have the right to say to you get your butt off the chair and move it (joking again )
    another thing to think about have you watch the barometic if its 102 how do you feel if its 98 how do you feel
    do you get barometic headaches.... they are the ones that drill right into your eye and if you could pull the sucker out you would give it to the candy man instead

    any way Im sorry to been such a hard ass when i came across and never ever take me serious my friends dont so why should you ok never ever and I am a practical joker ...
    now i must run and go mulch the leaves that have choosen to fall between the barns and not behind it,,
    sherrall

  11. #431
    Proud Canadian dealsniffer's Avatar
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    I am sorry but I stopped reading your post Sherall because I simply can't take the way you talk to other people and how you presume to know my situation and presume to know who I am as a person. Also to presume that there is even a "warm water pool" anywhere close to me is kind of silly too. To presume that I am sitting around whining and not living my life to the fullest possible is harsh. You do not know me and I do not know you and you can't come in here telling people to get off their buts when you have no idea whether they are on their buts or not. I made a decision a VEEERRRY long time ago to not let my pain and my issues take over my life and I do the most I possibly can. For your information my specialist who has done spine surgeries and studies for a very long time thought it was a great idea. I need to figure out when to stop yes but the wii has been excellent. So you obviously don't know everything. I also feel that you figure that because of everything you have been through that you have the right to be this way to other people but I am sorry I don't think you do. We all have our own ways of coping and living life and sometimes a kick in the pants is good but it isn't good when it comes from a total stranger who doesn't know when the right time is and how to properly say it to not offend others. Your way of this what ever you want to call it is improper. You can end up making a person feel worse instead of better if you go about it the wrong way but you have to know the person first to know that. You also can not assume to know a person just by reading a few posts on here. I am sorry this post is so harsh but I can't keep quiet or it is going to annoy me all day and I am not about to let someone's comments ruin my day which is mine to live and enjoy. If you have read this you would have noticed that I said to Skippy once that you can still have a good day even with pain. Yes I come on here to complain which is my way of venting it out and then I feel better and I am able to carry on. You are assuming things about my condition that I do not have and I think you should leave the diagnosing to other people who are more qualified and know me more than you do.
    Please take a moment to visit my blog! www.heatherv11.wordpress.com

  12. #432
    Mastermind Natalka's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Skippy View Post
    That you may know Grace and Peace in your own situation.
    That you may know some relief from pain,which can be overwhelming at times.
    That you have the strength for each day,knowing what is important.
    Lastly that you know there are others who really do care.

  13. #433
    Cat Trainer (Trainee??) Andit's Avatar
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    May I suggest we all stop playing the my disease is worse than yours game - the only winner is the one too healthy to be eligible.

    Here's a poem I've tried to use as my mantra the last couple of yrs. Hope you like it as much as I do:

    If I can stop one heart from breaking,
    I shall not live in vain:
    If I can ease one life the aching,
    Or cool one pain,
    Or help one fainting robin
    Unto his nest again,
    I shall not live in vain.
    Emily Dickinson

    For a smile, see our vids: http://www.youtube.com/lilyquincy

  14. #434
    Canadian Genius Skippy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Andit View Post
    May I suggest we all stop playing the my disease is worse than yours game - the only winner is the one too healthy to be eligible.

    Here's a poem I've tried to use as my mantra the last couple of yrs. Hope you like it as much as I do:

    If I can stop one heart from breaking,
    I shall not live in vain:
    If I can ease one life the aching,
    Or cool one pain,
    Or help one fainting robin
    Unto his nest again,
    I shall not live in vain.
    Emily Dickinson
    Absolutely true,thanks so much for sharing.

  15. #435
    Canadian Genius Skippy's Avatar
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    Skippy is ranting because the bottom of his tailbone hurts from opening an
    automatic door that wasn't being automatic.I could scream from the pain

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