INTIMACY, after the kids.....Is it POSSIBLE?

[froggiestyle]

[rachel1496]

Oh I did the text messaging and the whole sending of photos.....then He LEFT his phone one day...and I received texts from SOMEONE else stating NICE STUFF!!!.
That text came in while He was WITH ME!!!!!!!! Then and only then did he realize he left his phone. Up till now I have no clue as to which of his buddies..if not all...saw my STUFF. (boobs, butt and short and curlies)

Maybe skip the texting then.

[Natalka]

It is not only possible, it is necessary, frankly. We made sure we at least stayed at the level we were - but actually, as another poster said, ours increased, simply because I think we each felt so much more deeply and stronger about one another after we had our son.
Intimacy is much more than lovemaking, obviously - and part of being parents is having the best relationship possible to have a great, loving atmosphere in the family.
For us, we have never done the date-night thing, we're just not into the contrived stuff - but if it happened, it happened. Intimacy is every moment you are together - looking into each others' eyes just to connect (do this for more than 10 seconds), kissing hello and goodbye (do this for more than 10 seconds) - and in every other little thing as you live your daily life. Being spontaneous is definitely the key - depending on the ages of your kids, etc. We never, ever would have been inappropriate in front of our son - but it was funny the first time he was old enough to say "Get a room, wouldya!" However, our son has grown up knowing how totally his parents love each other, and knows when that isn't present in other families.
One time he totally brought me to tears when we were just chatting about 'love and stuff' and I asked him how he knew his dad loved me. He said - "all you have to do is look at his eyes when he looks at you when he comes home from work. They are full of love for you." THAT, I will never forget - and it's true.
As for sex, itself, well - you need those delicious hormones and the relaxation when things are hectic with kids and home. It's an amazing way to end the day, begin the day, or any time in between. Yup, TMI.
And if you are mad at each other, or life just isn't so great that day - cuddle anyway - anytime, anywhere!

[mpbabes]

Yeah..my sex life has its ups and downs since we had the baby.....many nights I'm just far too tired. I'm so much better during the day (and was super upset when DH got an urgent call from work on Saturday afternoon and had to leave...I had other plans LOL)

But I agree that intimacy is so much more. Kissing, hugging, cuddling and saying "I love you" keep us going through those times when life gets in the way.

[funn2009]

Please join this group for more discussions

http://forum.smartcanucks.ca/group.php?groupid=38

Thanks in advance.

[prince$$]

Please join this group for more discussions

http://forum.smartcanucks.ca/group.php?groupid=38

Thanks in advance.

Well, my children *are* my life, but I KNOW there's more....Can I still join?

[babygonnermann]

I find we are more intimate after our son was born. That may be why we're expecting our second already I didn't think it was possible to have a better sex life, but apparently it was. Right now it's not good, but that's cause I'm super sick and always exhausted. I tell ya ... can't wait for Tyler to have a nap every day right now cause it means I get to lie down

[Merk1982]

Oh do I feel for you, I have a very high sex drive now and before I had my girls. I had my first when I was 18 and unfortunately the father wasn't ready to have children so I was dealing with alot of emotional things so sex was not top of my list, I was still affectionate but not sexual. He however had an even higher sex drive then me (and wondered why we became pregnant). He was not happy if he didn't get it twice or more a day. When my daughter was a month and a half old I woke up to feed her and found him and a friend together in my bathroom. It needless to say killed my sex drive all together. I from then on was doing it to just shut him up. I could not balance my life the way I should have (not to say it wouldn't have happened if I had). I became pregnant again 2 years later and still had no desire to be with him physically. I couldn't handle the emotional roller coaster when my youngest daughter became a year old so I left and I met my boyfriend right after and what I thought was dead came back to life and oh did I find out how much I missed it. Now we have to struggle at times to find the time because he works 12 hour days and comes home and spends as much time as possible with the girls before they go to bed and of course he is tired. Which I would be to and at times we are in a rut. We have taken to middle of the night, but at times that can be a problem because there isn't always spice at 3 in the morning. But for now it's working.

[nicjosemm]

I have three children and we have sex everyday and sometimes a couple times a day. It is all about just taking a couple mins here or there. We have learned to make it fast. Our fav spotis the garage. The door to house is loocked, sometimes kids on other side asking where stuff is while we are having a moment. We just grab a moment when you can find it and we are both happier for it. Even a middle of the night 5 min rumble is good. ( 5 mins in our books is long HEHE). Just make the time and you'll be happier that you did.

[wifeyclk]

I like this topic guys!

I just had my 3rd baby..she's 2wks old. When we had our son, We were married at 19 going on 20. Quite young in many ppl's books. We had our fair share of struggles which totally turned me off of sex/intimacy altogether. We were legally separated for a yr...then we reconciled and worked on our marriage and got pregnant with our daughter. I wasn't that into the whole intimacy thing but the hubby is...I can understand how it's difficult to get that feeling going..esp after having babies, the pressure of getting back into shape and caring for the other children (if you have any) and the household chores. But like the other posters say, it's all about timing, and making the most of the day.

Definitely the 'i love you's & kissing here and there helps build that 'us' back..

[Katyana08]

It is definitely possible! That's what commercial breaks are for, lol. I am fairly tired after cleaning, cooking, watching the baby and going on day trips, and he's pretty tired after working all day. We'll just zone out on the couch and watch tv, and then see if we can have our fun and get back before the commercials are over. Maybe I think too much like a guy, but all I really want is 3 minutes, and then to eat and not have to move for an hour. I guess my point is after kids most people just don't have the time to 'make an evening of it.' Sometimes all you have is the 3-4 minutes between House episodes Just pick a show that's on A LOT!

[tidytaurus]

We only have one 18 year old living with us he likes knowing his dad can still get some at his age!!! As for me I just let him have his way with me and endure it until he is done.ROFL, we might be getting old but at least we're still getting something. When I had small children at home I always had a strict bedtime because I needed mommy time and I also got up way before them because I needed my coffee with no interuptions.

[Monique.b]

Well, I'm by no means an expert on this subject, pregnancy is totally cramping our style these days, but after our first daughter was born, I struggled to get back on track. I think for me it's a matter of priorities. There will always be dishes to wash and toys to pick up, so let em wait! Save some energy for the things you actually care about.

I still spend most days in my jammies, but on the weekends I do my hair, put on makeup, and make the effort. I also found getting enough exercise makes a huge difference. It gives me so much more energy to do other things. Like my husband. hehehe

[urouj862]

we have 3 kids, and seems like after every kid it gets better.. we said we would stop after our 1st,.. YEA right, i think # 4 isnt too far away lol

[cmontario]

once a year