Do others experience this same problem?

Well my DH is not a fan of my new found hobby. Does anyone eles experience (I want to say jealousy) issues with the time they spend checking out this site and dealing with all the coupon stuff. Or forgeting what you needed to get at the store verus getting all the amazing deals.

My DH will tell me that I make coupons too much of a priority and not focused on what needs to get done (the newest thing he is into)
I feel this is a constant battle and with me being the sole income to the family and finding the time to cook, clean, deal with poodles, home business, and work. I feel I am lucky to get to do my coupons on my little free time.

(My DH has scocial issues which forces him not to leave the house= no dog walking/taking the garbage/recycling out, going to any store. It is a good day if he can handle sitting in the car with me for the ride. He has now decided to fast for the next week which = no doing the dishes or anything kitchen related.)

Sorry for the vent but I just dont know who to complain too.

Hon, does your DH realize that, by doing the footwork and saving household money that you're being supportive of your relationship and its success? It's a LOT of work watching for deals and getting them. Is there any way he would consider involving himself in the saving process and contributing to the success of the household? My DH sometimes makes comments and I just say that I'm only cheap with the stuff we need, not the stuff we want and that every cent I save on, say, dish detergent or whatever goes towards the fun stuff. Maybe if your DH got involved with an understanding of the vision you have, he would be less resentful and more helpful. And hey, two sets of eyes is better than one! Imagine what you can accomplish together!

My hubby is actually thrilled.... in the beginning he was a little.... reluctant, but when he saw how many coupons were coming in, saw me finding freebies and such online, he actually started getting into it himself. Convinced him to come over and help me log the coupons I had into a spreadsheet, he came upon one and said "Wow, December 2011, this is a GREAT coupon!" We're really tight financially though, to a scary degree, there's no extras around here at all, and the recession combined with his recovery from open heart surgery means that's it's going to be like this for awhile.....

See if he might want to partake in the hobby? I dunno if it will work or not, cause I don't know him, but if he's jealous of the time you spend doing it, it might help if he's a big part and helping with it.

I hope things get better for you soon :flowers:

Maybe try to to get him to help you organize your coupons and things like that. I think that men sometimes really don't UNDERSTAND how much is being saved and what's going on, because we sometimes take control of everything. (sometimes with good reason lol. They say if you want something done right, do it yourself lol)

I hope you can try to get him to work with you, instead of against you. Men can definitely be stubborn! :)

Oh gosh, I've had to re-type my response several times so it doesn't sound harsh. But hon, I really really hope that he's seeking help. If he has a social phobia that prevents him from going outside to take out the garbage, that is BAD. I don't know you two, so I'm just going off what you've said, but it sounds like he's a self-centered man-child and you're his doting mother. You just said that he doesn't work, can't do a lot of household chores, gets upset that you have a hobby that takes your focus away from HIS interests.. I feel for you.

My husband totally makes fun of me & sometimes complains about the time I spend on here, and he thinks I'm crazy for bringing home so much stuff, but in the end he's happy because I'm saving us money & he knows it makes ME happy.

I don't understand guys like him. My wife and I get involved and search the flyers and watch for deals together. We both love finding a good deal. Having said this, in my professional life I head up the purchasing department for a large company and I have about a dozen Buyers who report to me. Saving money and finding deals is just what I love to do! The more money I save the happier my company's clients are.
That relates back to my wife and I...the more we save on things the more fun we can have.

PS Am I the only man who posts?

Also, I agree with the other posters -- you should get him involved in it by cutting out coupons, ordering them online, going through flyers online & making shopping lists for you, etc.

And maybe have him keep track of how much you're saving by using coupons?

Save your receipts!!!.. they show the amount you save.. and after you have saved a bunch.. show them to him... the receipts dont lie :)

imasham, I think you might be one of the very few.


He wants nothing to do with coupons, and when we did help me (once) tear the coupons apart from the full sheet half of the upcs were ripped off!

Like one poster said, If you want it done right do it yourself.

Ihave to agree with Blaw. sorry.hope your dh can find the help he really needs.

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Originally Posted by Poodlegirl

He wants nothing to do with coupons, and when we did help me (once) tear the coupons apart from the full sheet half of the upcs were ripped off!

Like one poster said, If you want it done right do it yourself.

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In that case, if he doesn't want you to spend the time to use coupons & save you guys money, tell him he has to earn his keep -- earn a minimum of $100/week. That should counter what you could save using coupons.

Mine was not happy when I started. Then I came home with 2 bags of stuff and only had $20 to spend. His first wuestion was "Did you get my "X"?" I handed him the receipt and he was open-jawed.

He supports it enough now to allow some mail to come to us in his name (places that allow coupons based on name not address).

Good luck with your DH....I used to suffer from agoraphobia, myself...still do a little. It's rough.

my hubby dont like my couponing either :(.

Oh Poodlegirl...I read your post and I cried for you. What you said isn't complaining. I've been there, and it sucks hardcore some days. If couponing is something fun for you, do it! Sometimes, a good deal at WM is all that gets me through the day!!

I won't tell you how to live your life, and believe me, I understand spouses with anxiety, but...please, please, please tell me he is getting help. It sounds like you have several full-time jobs right now. His full-time job needs to be working on his mental health, and the first way to do that is to get help.

PM me any time.

My DH used to think it was stupid but now he supports me. He doesn't help sort or anything, but he will actually use a coupon now when I send him out with it, and loves to see my receipts. I've caught him bragging to him Mom and friends how much I save!

Gee, I don't think the problem is in your couponing, etc. ...

I hope he is getting professional help for his challenges; if he isn't he surely needs to.

Seems to me that he is trying to control 'something' - and I think he's trying to make you feel guilty (about not spending more time with him, etc.), but you surely don't need to be. You are doing it all - and even if that is your choice, you are not getting any support!

Since he's at home, perhaps as others suggested, you could give him some tasks to do to find coupons, do spreadsheets on savings, search for deals, etc. Plus, if he sees a listing of what amounts you are saving by doing couponing, etc. he might be more supportive.

Just a side note - my husband fasts at times, but that sure doesn't keep him out of the kitchen! On those days, he would prepare food if needed for the rest of the family.

http://www.zwani.com/graphics/hugs/images/gy6.gif

my bf in begin said I am sooo crazy in SC, to collect coupons, to shop cheap deals in begin. He said "cutting coupons and find the cheapest stuffs only good for retirement seniors, not you". I looked at him but I didn't say anything.

He yelled at me couple times, he said why I need to price match + SPC in zellers? Why I need to go SDM for 20x bonus..... many times, he said I am wasting our times.

However, only like 2 months after, his attitude is changed... he feels I am smart and money saver. Especially he noticed that, because of SC, I can get many free, or almost free stuffs. The SDM bonus points make him believes "There is some crazy company have that good rebate system". He understand that, if we good to manage coupons and deal, we can save lots of money per year...

now, everything he wants to buy, he will ask me to find the better deal for him... I just use my points to get a free netbook for him last Christmas, he loves it alot

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Originally Posted by imasham

I don't understand guys like him. My wife and I get involved and search the flyers and watch for deals together. We both love finding a good deal. Having said this, in my professional life I head up the purchasing department for a large company and I have about a dozen Buyers who report to me. Saving money and finding deals is just what I love to do! The more money I save the happier my company's clients are.
That relates back to my wife and I...the more we save on things the more fun we can have.

PS Am I the only man who posts?

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Don't worry, I got your back on the male side! Eventhough I am new here, I have been a heavy user of a related website (which apparently is frowned upon to reference here lol) and love finding a great deal!

But yes, like you, we both enjoy finding a good deal. Every since I was young I've always been good at saving my money and getting the full value out of it. I don't think I've bought anything at regular price in the longest time. Every once in a while I will get the occasional eye roll when I say or do something really cheap, but its all in good fun.

And like you said, the savings that are had now, the more fun we can have with the savings. We enjoy taking vacations so this allows us to go on several trips a year!

I'm sorry about the situation your in,but if he doesn't work,wouldn't help with the housework ,i don't think he can say to much.

When i started couponing in the early 80's my husband didn't say much" i know he didn't like it as there was always coupons on the diningroom table.Then he changed i once over heard him tell a buddy "If it makes her happy then so am i"

I slowly introduced my hubby into couponing! One coupon at a time then - last week we both went shopping together he paid cash and used one coupon - and I used 95% in coupons!

He came home flabbergasted - he could not believe what just happened in the store - I let him go through cash first - He paid $60.00 - and he stayed around to bag my cart full! I have an amazing hubby! :)
He told me all the positive things I wanted to hear! how quick I was in the store - only because he was there I didn't cruise up & down the ailes searching for coupons :) - how I saved us a whole bunch of money - I only paid $3.02 and $46.00 in coupons :)

Slowly introduce him to it is the key - before you'll know he'll be asking what did he get in the mail today!

That really sucks. I have a similar problem with my other half sometimes.

He sighs out of boredom when I show him all the stuff I get for next to nothing. He just hates hearing about it because it isn't of interest to him. He does know, though, that my habit is nothing but a gain for him. The more I save on essentials, the more money we'll have to play with.

There's no excuse for him belittling you for your couponing or demanding that you do what he wants on the time you have off from doing all your other chores. I would tell him to stop that immediately.

It sounds like you basically do everything, from all the housework to making the money to doing the shopping, and truthfully, you work so hard for what you have, he has no right to tell you you can't stretch out the dollars you make. You deserve to go home with something in your pocket after working hard for your money, and if coupons let you do that, power to you!

Don't let anyone make you feel bad for something you enjoy! If you need support, everyone here is always around to support you, so don't hesitate if you need a bit of moral support when things get tough.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by imasham

I don't understand guys like him. My wife and I get involved and search the flyers and watch for deals together. We both love finding a good deal. Having said this, in my professional life I head up the purchasing department for a large company and I have about a dozen Buyers who report to me. Saving money and finding deals is just what I love to do! The more money I save the happier my company's clients are.
That relates back to my wife and I...the more we save on things the more fun we can have.

PS Am I the only man who posts?

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nope there are lots of dads men and sahd on here

MY DH do tent to make fun of me, and I'm still yet to prove myself to him, but being the big spender in our family and I mean.. BIG.. just my efforts to save money makes him ok with letting me have my fun LOL..
I feel sorry for you poodlegirl .. I tend to agree with blawblaw- he's a child that need to grow up, get a job, and get help.
I don't know him, but that's really actually p..ing me off..
People that claim to be depressed.. to me it's just an excuse for laziness and lack of will. I'm sorry:(
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my dh was quite angry till I came home with over a hundred bottles of cleaner showed him the recipt and my son said see moms not putting us in the poor house only a clean house I dang near peed myself with laugher my ds loves the fact that I do need to buy stuff every week and we can relax and enjoy life

for example

cleaning suppies good for 6month to a year out of pocket expensis 11.50 ish
toilet paper and paper towels 3-6 month supply around 20 bucks
lotion soap toiletries 6- year arund 35 bucks
totthbrushés toothpaste 3-6 months around 7 bucks
for pantry stalked for about a year total cost 85 bucks lots of soup pasta etc
cereal 2-3 month supp 9.50 ish

the best part is on a lot of the stuff I got there were coupons for fpc for more items wich I have not used

so really you save money a lot doing this I just remind myself if I have lots on hand and do not need anymore I will not get it everything goes on sale at least once or 3 twice

tell hubby to be supportive show him your recipts I did anf hubby now smiles when he looks at the bank account thanks

Wow, great advise & supportive SCers! :)

I feel for you & your situation!! Don't want to be harsh either but I would tell him to get some help asap & start sharing some of the work!! You have alot on your plate as it is!! Couponing is fun, relaxing for me, lol & the savings are so worth the time it takes!! He should appreciate your efforts to save your family money so you have more $$$ for other fun stuff!!
It sure takes the stress/pressure off when you know you have a stockpile of goodies & not paid alot for it & always have stuff on hand & not have to pay full price! etc!

Good luck & HUGS!!! for ya!!!

Aw! My heart goes out to you, Poodlegirl! I can't imagine how tired you must be! Take care!

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Originally Posted by ypperin

My hubby is actually thrilled.... in the beginning he was a little.... reluctant, but when he saw how many coupons were coming in, saw me finding freebies and such online, he actually started getting into it himself. Convinced him to come over and help me log the coupons I had into a spreadsheet, he came upon one and said "Wow, December 2011, this is a GREAT coupon!" We're really tight financially though, to a scary degree, there's no extras around here at all, and the recession combined with his recovery from open heart surgery means that's it's going to be like this for awhile.....

See if he might want to partake in the hobby? I dunno if it will work or not, cause I don't know him, but if he's jealous of the time you spend doing it, it might help if he's a big part and helping with it.

I hope things get better for you soon :flowers:

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This Made Me Smile. So Cutee ! :)

:(

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Poodlegirl

Well my DH is not a fan of my new found hobby. Does anyone eles experience (I want to say jealousy) issues with the time they spend checking out this site and dealing with all the coupon stuff. Or forgeting what you needed to get at the store verus getting all the amazing deals.

My DH will tell me that I make coupons too much of a priority and not focused on what needs to get done (the newest thing he is into)
I feel this is a constant battle and with me being the sole income to the family and finding the time to cook, clean, deal with poodles, home business, and work. I feel I am lucky to get to do my coupons on my little free time.

(My DH has scocial issues which forces him not to leave the house= no dog walking/taking the garbage/recycling out, going to any store. It is a good day if he can handle sitting in the car with me for the ride. He has now decided to fast for the next week which = no doing the dishes or anything kitchen related.)

Sorry for the vent but I just dont know who to complain too.

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Sorry to hear your troubles. It's hard when there's tension. HOw about trying to get him involved in some way? Like choosing his favourite products out of the coupons and helping you?

OOps i saw he just ruined a bunch of coupons. hmmm.

well, how about setting some time aside from SC and coupons and doing something intimate together? A game, an activity, planning an outing, watching a show together all snuggled up? I often find arguments like these arise from lack of intimacy and relationship issues elsewhere?