Club Q Q107-Loyalty Club (Southern ON Only) v4

[the H team]

Sarah won today's cash track.

Thanx KR for posting the winner. Silly customers get in the way of fun time.

Sent from my LG-D852 using Tapatalk

[rock lobster]

Is your weather there really that bad?
Flight leaving Orlando delayed until
2:00 pm tomorrow!

[The Jester]

While I would doubt the authenticity of these being children's responses - they're amusing nonetheless:

KIDS WERE ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS. THE FOLLOWING 25 STATEMENTS ABOUT THE BIBLE WERE WRITTEN BY CHILDREN.THEY HAVE NOT BEEN RETOUCHED OR CORRECTED. INCORRECT SPELLING HAS BEEN LEFT IN.

1.IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING
THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.

2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS
JOAN OF ARK. NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.

3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY,
BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING THE NIGHT.

4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY
THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.

5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A
JEZEBEL LIKE DELILAH

6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.

7. MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD,
WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS.

8. THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT.

AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO MOUNTCYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.

9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.

10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.

11. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA THEN JOSHUA LED

THE HEBREWS IN THE BATTLEOF GERITOL.

12. THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON

TO STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.

13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR.

HE FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.

14. SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.

15. WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA.

16. WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND

JESUS IN THE MANAGER.

17. JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.

18. ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.

19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS

BEFORE THEY DO ONE TO YOU.

HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.

20. IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED

TO GETTHE TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.

21. THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.

22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.

23. ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.

24. ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY,

WHICH IS ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE.

25. CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY.



Aren't Children great!!

[kawam]

[kawam]

[ecat444]

Had a one hour visit with this kitty Onyx whom I mentioned last week, I'm very glad to learn he will be residing in the volunteer office starting Friday, this is great news because it gets him out of the darn cage and he will have the company of those who work in the office all day. I am glad he will get more freedom, he will still be up for adoption. They said I will be the first to know when he finds his home as I've expressed my concerns about him! His cries for company haunted me all last week.......

[The Jester]

[Warning some offensive language]

Classic Carlin on expressions and sayings

[heartgirl99]

Is your weather there really that bad?
Flight leaving Orlando delayed until
2:00 pm tomorrow!

it's hasn't arrived yet but the ice storm cometh!
Summary Freezing rain is expected, beginning near dawn on Thursday. Periods of snow associated with an approaching storm system are forecast to spread in the region by early this evening. The snow will change to ice pellets by late this evening, then change to freezing rain by early Thursday morning. Between 5 and 10 mm of ice accumulation are possible before the freezing rain changes to rain on Thursday afternoon as temperatures rise above zero. Surfaces such as highways, roads, walkways and parking lots will become icy, slippery and hazardous. Take extra care when walking or driving in affected areas. There may be a significant impact on rush hour traffic in urban areas. Ice build-up may cause tree branches to break. Utility outages may occur. Please continue to monitor alerts and forecasts issued by Environment Canada. To report severe weather, send an email to [email protected] or tweet reports to #ONStorm.

[heartgirl99]

Hi everyone! David's wife's name is spelled " Polly "

Have a GRAND day!

ELMO!
how nice to see you again!

[dededi]

Good evening everyone, I hope you had a good Wednesday!

[the H team]

Good news here, there's white stuff coming down, instead of the freezing stuff. Like that much better. Hoping it's not too bad wherever you are.

[heartgirl99]

Good news here, there's white stuff coming down, instead of the freezing stuff. Like that much better. Hoping it's not too bad wherever you are.

so far just snow here too.
looking forward to a snow day....

[Mechman47]

A week or so...For David!

We miss you Richard...


and so many others.

[WolfDio]

Good Morning all. Take it easy out there today! I'm not going anywhere.... I took off my snows on Monday .

Ahhh...
So it's Your Fault!!

Just Kidding

You Think I am going to Blame Momma Nature???

Nah Unh!!!!

[Mechman47]

Mother...

I love you!