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Results 34,186 to 34,200 of 46438
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 12:22 PM #34186
- Join Date
- Jul 2009
- Location
- Formerly East York, now North York
- Posts
- 965
- Likes Received
- 3770
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 12:23 PM #34187
- Join Date
- Mar 2009
- Location
- Cobourg
- Age
- 69
- Posts
- 2,832
- Likes Received
- 30
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
Good Morning My Friends. Just got back from Minden. My sisters went up to the cottage on the weekend and one of them forgot her meds up there. I went up yesterday and decided I might as well spend the night and drink some beer. What would sisters do without brothers?
Have A Nice Day...Stewy
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 12:25 PM #34188
- Join Date
- Aug 2009
- Location
- Niagara Falls
- Posts
- 1,270
- Likes Received
- 39
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 12:29 PM #34189
- Join Date
- Jul 2010
- Location
- Trenton, ON
- Posts
- 7,085
- Likes Received
- 41396
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 12:30 PM #34190
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 12:37 PM #34191
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 12:50 PM #34192
- Join Date
- Sep 2009
- Location
- Brampton
- Age
- 56
- Posts
- 3,134
- Likes Received
- 0
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
I was 4. Probably watching Sesame Street or Batman.
I met Paul Henderson twelve years or so ago at a video convention. My assistant manager of the video store I worked at and I were walking around the various booths when they announced Paul was about to start signing autographs. I rushed over, and my assistant, who was considerably younger than I am, said (within earshot of Paul) "Who the hell is he?"
Needless to say, I was motrally embarassed.What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Titanic have in common?
They both look good until they hit the ice.
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 01:03 PM #34193
- Join Date
- Jun 2010
- Location
- No one goes off-trail. No one walks alone.
- Posts
- 20,183
- Likes Received
- 65755
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 01:05 PM #34194
- Join Date
- Mar 2009
- Location
- Cobourg
- Age
- 69
- Posts
- 2,832
- Likes Received
- 30
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 01:40 PM #34195
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Valhǫllr - "hall of the slain"
- Age
- 61
- Posts
- 27,725
- Likes Received
- 12380
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
A blind man and his guide dog enter a bar and find their way to a barstool. After ordering a drink, and sitting there for a while, the blind guy yells to the bartender,
"Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke ?"
The bar immediately becomes absolutely quiet. In a husky, deep voice, the woman next to him says,
"Before you tell that joke, you should know something.The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde, and I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb.blonde with a black belt in karate. What's more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she's a weight lifter. The lady to your right is a blonde, and she's a wrestler. Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?"
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 01:45 PM #34196
- Join Date
- Nov 2009
- Location
- Valhǫllr - "hall of the slain"
- Age
- 61
- Posts
- 27,725
- Likes Received
- 12380
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
A man walks into a bar with an ostrich and a cat and sits at the bar. The bartender walks over to them and says, "What can I get for you?"
The man says "I'll have a beer", the ostrich says, "I'll have a beer", and the cat says, "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." So the bartender says, "OK, that will be $3.87."
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him. About an hour later the bartender goes back over to them and says, "What'll you guys have?"
The man says, "I'll have a beer", the ostrich says, "I'll have a beer", and the cat says "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." The bartender gets them their beer and says "That'll be $3.87."
The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him. A couple of days later they come back into the bar and the bartender walks over and asks "What do you guys want today?"
The man says, "I'll have a scotch", the ostrich says, "I'll have a bourbon", and the cat says, "I'll have half a beer and I'm not buying." So the bartender says "OK, that will be $7.53." The man reaches into his pocket and brings out the exact change and pays him.
The bartender's curiosity got the best of him and he asks, "Why is it that every time I tell you the amount you owe you always have the exact change in you pocket?"
The man said, "I found a bottle with a genie in it and she granted me 3 wishes. My first wish was that I always have the exact change in my pocket for anything I buy."
The bartender says, "That's a great wish...better than asking for a million dollars. A million dollars will run out but that never will. What were your other 2 wishes?"
The man says, "That's where I screwed up. I asked for a chick with long legs and a tight pussy."
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 02:03 PM #34197
afternoon Q sters,
wow, how about that rain! it was coming down in buckets, now the sun is out. thanx for all the wws, trivia answers & reps.
well there's less than 3 months before the big day. your shopping should almost be done & wrapping started.
i 2nd, 3rd & 4th that. thank you so much for all you do. you are truly appreciated.
thanx for the answers, but are you now working 24/7? it's 3am! do you ever sleep?
go right ahead & vent, rant or what ever makes you feel better. this broad is a piece of what, or a piece of something for that matter.
was scrolling down the list & noticed everyone but you had spelled it wrong, if you're a canadian.
NASCAR SEASON is complete for 2021.
Kyle Larson wins his 1st Nascar Championship.
nascar:a way of life
everything else is just a game
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 02:12 PM #34198
A foursome of guys is waiting at the men’s tee while a foursome of women is hitting from the ladies' tee. The ladies are taking their time.
When the final lady is ready to hit her ball, she hacks it 10 feet, then goes over and whiffs it completely. Then she hacks it another ten feet and finally hacks it another five feet.
She looks up at the patiently waiting men and says apologetically, "I guess all those " F------LESSONS" I took over the winter didn't help."
One of the men immediately responds, "Well, there you have it. You should have taken "golf lessons" instead!"
He never even had a chance to duck. He was 43.......NASCAR SEASON is complete for 2021.
Kyle Larson wins his 1st Nascar Championship.
nascar:a way of life
everything else is just a game
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 02:13 PM #34199
- Join Date
- Mar 2010
- Location
- Milton, but looking in Brooklin
- Posts
- 171
- Likes Received
- 0
- Trading Score
- 0 (0%)
A guy walked into a pub and immediately noticed a young lady at the bar on her own. After a couple of drinks, he decided to offer her a drink and make small talk.
"What's your name?" he asked.
"Carmen," she replied.
"That's a nice name," he said. "Did your mother or father name you that?"
"Neither," she said. "I changed my name when I was 18 from Sharon to Carmen."
"Why did you do that?" he asked.
"Well," she explained, "I like men and I like cars, so that is how I got my name. What's your name?"
"Beertits," the man replied.
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Tue, Sep 28th, 2010, 02:22 PM #34200
An Arizona couple, both well into their 80's, go to a sex therapist's office.
The doctor asks, 'What can I do for you?'
The man says, 'Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?'
The doctor raises both eyebrows, but he is so amazed that such an elderly couple is asking for sexual advice that he agrees.
When the couple finishes, the doctor says, 'There's absolutely nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse..'
He thanks them for coming, he wishes them good luck, he charges them $50 and he says good bye.
The next week, the same couple returns and asks the sex therapist to watch again. The sex therapist is a bit puzzled, but agrees.
This happens several weeks in a row
The couple makes an appointment, has intercourse with no problems, pays the doctor, then leave.
Finally, after 3 months of this routine, the doctor says, 'I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Just what are you trying to find out?'
The man says, 'We're not trying to find out anything.
She's married; so we can't go to her house.
I'm married; and we can't go to my house.
The Holiday Inn charges $98.
The Hilton charges $139.
We do it here for $50, and
Medicare pays $43 of it, leaving my net cost of $7.
SHAME ON YOU FOR LAUGHING AT THAT...
NASCAR SEASON is complete for 2021.
Kyle Larson wins his 1st Nascar Championship.
nascar:a way of life
everything else is just a game
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