Does anyone else feel this way about birthday gifts for kids?

[ame555]

My son is going to be three this week. Mother and sister in laws want to know what he wanted. (both of which constantly complain they have NO money)

My reply "Honestly he doesn't need anything, he loves puzzles if you want to get him a little puzzle and then a little money for his piggy bank that would be wonderful".

They both show up yesterday with these huge bags of for lack of a better term "junk", they each spent atleast $50 on littel nick-nacks, teddy bears, water guns etc.

I don't want to sound selfish but I don't get it? I always grew up getting one present for my birthday and my grandparents would give us a littel money for our piggy bank or to put away in savings.

My parents philopshy is "your kids aren't going to remember the toys they had at 2 years old, but they will remember if you can help them out at school when they are 18"

Also I think a kid doesn't appreciate anything if they get lots?

Anyone else in a situation like this? I am really frustrated by it.

Thanks so much

[maybe]

My son is two and he gets way too much from family members. We spread the gifts around the various houses he spends time at (mine, my sister's and his grandparent's). For us this works well because we live 2 hours from everyone and having toys at their homes means less packing for us. Personally I would prefer one "good" gift or some money for his RESP rather than lots of little things, but it's the thought that counts I suppose.

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

I don't know, I think kids should be spoiled to an extent- childhood is so short. I don't spend a lot of money on kids gifts but I do try to get a lot with what I have- I love to do a themed gift, like a bag full of art supplies, a bag of dress up cloths, a movie they want with popcorn bowls and popcorn.

My own children will have the best Christmas ever thanks to sales and SDM points, lol. As long as you teach them the value of saying thank you and meaning it, they'll be ok

[ame555]

Thanks for the feedback ladies!

[Zonny]

I totally agree with you! I used to have a stepmother who did the same darned thing; I'd say he really didn't need things, she cried about how poor she was all the time but still showed up with too many expensive things.

I've been to birthday parties with my DS (he's five) where there's 15+ kids invited, plus family members. The birthday boy/girl hardly gets a chance to look at the thing in his hands before someone is pushing something else into them. 15+ gifts at one time is a lot.

IMO, kids don't NEED that much stuff when they're so young, but that's just my own rule for my child. I don't want him to turn into a kid who expects to get piles of stuff for any occasion, and eventually it's never enough. For birthdays, our rule of thumb is that he can invite as many kids as he is old - so for his fifth, he could invite five kids.

[gracesmommy]

i agree.. it frustrates me that ppl feel they need to buy my girls things just to buy things. id rather someone put $10 in their piggy bank instead of a bunch of knick knacky things that wount get used.

[erin9mmm]

My parents philopshy is "your kids aren't going to remember the toys they had at 2 years old, but they will remember if you can help them out at school when they are 18"

My dad always would say that kids should be spoiled (in the best sense of the word, not as in brat) when they are young, they have the rest of their lives for everything else.

I'd say he really didn't need things, she cried about how poor she was all the time but still showed up with too many expensive things.

I think when relatives do that it just shows how much they love the children, they rather put their money towards making the kids happy than anything else.

IMO, I wouldn't worry about it. I have relatives that do the same thing. My great aunt collects things all the time to give to my girls, most of which would probably be considered junk but my girls love it and that's what matters. What I usually do is take some of it and put it aside for rainy day or sick day surprises.