ADHD/Bi-Polar/ODD... I'm at the end of my rope :(

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

Tami, I cant even pretend to know what you are going through. I just want you to know that we are here for you and your son. It's not fair that no one will treat him. How can them ignoring an issue help your child?
I like what Bella said. Take him to emergency. Your child needs help...hell YOU need help, helping your child!
Please take care and let us know if we can help you with anything, even if its just a phone call...
<3

Thank you SO much! I hate that they're brushing us off and not getting him the help he needs. It's like nobody knows what to do about him- they are doctor's, isn't that what they are trained for???? Argh, it makes me so mad!!

I love the support I've gotten here, from all of you

just a word of advice with using emerg it is a GREAT thing for building proof of symptoms but please please don't expect they will admit him the first time either.

MY DD was in by police 6 different times before she got admitted the first time and the only reason she got admitted that time was the cop told the doctor "yyou are going to admit her or we are gonna outside and just bring her back in again"

If he is violent you need an antipychotic med (risperodone and serquel and the new one abilify)

Thank you for offering your support and advice- I will definitely be PMing you and asking you some questions!!

[MrsSunshine]

thanks Justme

[edeneh]

Have you gone to Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto?
It might be far from where you are, but going to Toronto could be worth it.

I have ADHD, and I was on medication for years until recently.
Hopefully your son will grow out of it when he gets older

[jamieg123]

I agree with the allergy tests, and I would have a blood allergy test done at a naturopath because they are more accurate than a scratch test, but also I would like to tell you about a product called frequensea. It is completely natural and safe but it has an ingerdient in it that is so calming and it crosses the blood brain barrier so I am wondering if it would help your son? I know it helps mine alot, lol!! Keep your head up!

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

Have you gone to Sick Kids Hospital in Toronto?
It might be far from where you are, but going to Toronto could be worth it.

I have ADHD, and I was on medication for years until recently.
Hopefully your son will grow out of it when he gets older

Well, we're next on the list to be seen at CHEO (Children's hospital in Ottawa) but if we don't get anywhere with them I'll look into it I hope he grows out of it but it's more than just ADHD.

I agree with the allergy tests, and I would have a blood allergy test done at a naturopath because they are more accurate than a scratch test, but also I would like to tell you about a product called frequensea. It is completely natural and safe but it has an ingerdient in it that is so calming and it crosses the blood brain barrier so I am wondering if it would help your son? I know it helps mine alot, lol!! Keep your head up!

I will look into that, thank you

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

Well, my difficult little man is gone to his Dad's for the summer... for all the trouble I have with him I thought it would nice to have a break. Well, I miss him like crazy!!!

[MrsSunshine]

of course you will.. you love him. I totally understand.. if it'll make ya feel better.. i can send my son to keep you company for the summer

[Insane]

of course you will.. you love him. I totally understand.. if it'll make ya feel better.. i can send my son to keep you company for the summer

Not if I send my kids first!

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

LOL, I went from having just my little guy yesterday to having 5 kids around! I played babysitter yesterday, haha

[ashokia]

DS is 7 years old and suffers from severe ADHD/ODD and I strongly feel that he suffers from bi-polar as well, although he hasn't been diagnosed with that. He's tried so many different meds... concerta, aderall, biphentin, vyvanse, risperidone, ritalin... that all start out working wonderfully but after a month or two the effects just seem to wear off and all he has left are the horrible side effects. We've tried combinations of meds and that hasn't worked either. We've worked with a behavioral therapist who finally gave up and said there was nothing else she could do for us. His pediatrician has mentioned soon dropping us as a client because she is out of options. We've been waiting for a consultation from the children's hospital in Ottawa for over a year now.

I just don't know what to do. He has a younger brother and I fear that he will do something to really hurt him. At 7, he can already overpower me and he's a skinny little thing. his violent outbursts have gotten worse and more frequent. I hate to say it but I don't feel like I have any relationship left with him at all I'm losing my little boy and nobody will do a damn thing to help me. There has to be something we can do...

I can't be the only one so if you have any suggestions I would love to hear them.

Boy does this bring back memories. My youngest brother is all of the above (and later diagnosed as scizophrenic). He is currently living on the streets doing god knows what and addicted to crack. He was on a bunch of drugs as a child too. None of them helped. My mom ended up putting him in foster care at the age of ten after he threatened my older brother and I with a knife.

After he was correctly diagnosed they found the right combination of drugs that worked for him. When he's on them, he is the sweetest, most loving brother in the world. When he's off them, he's violent and angry. At Christmas three years ago, he started off giving me a hug and then started to choke me. My husband had to drag him off of me and I haven't seen him since, although we do talk on the phone once in awhile.

The cops usually pull him off the streets once every few months and he goes back to living in a group home until he goes off his meds, does something to damage the home or hurt the other patients and gets kicked out. It is a never ending struggle trying to cope with someone like this.

One of the main reasons I was so hesitant about having children was because of my little brother. I was always so angry with my mother for giving up on him, and I promised myself I'd never give up my child so easily, but you still have to wonder if you'll have the strength to cope with something like this.

Luckily my husband is an Adaptive Technologist in the Centre for Students with Disabilities at the College here. He deals with kids like this every day, and for the most part, when they come from supportive families, they can lead very normal lives. Your son is still growing, and his body chemistry is changing every day. Until he reaches puberty, the drugs are probably never going to stay working for long, because he is changing every day.

My husband's sister-in-law has a son with the same condition and she had an extremely hard time with him, but now he's a teenager and doing perfectly well.

The most important thing is to make sure you and your other son are both safe. You might want to go so far is to get a lock for one of your cupboards to store your knives/lighters/etc. in. Yes, that might seem extreme, but my little brother pulled knives on us, set fire to our basement and stabbed his teacher with a pencil. Try to make sure not to leave them alone together.

If you need anyone to talk to, just send me a PM. I know it can be hard and you feel like a failure for not being able to make it better, but it is NOT YOUR FAULT.

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

Thank you ashokia. I have taken a lot of measures to ensure things are put away so he can't get to them. The problem with him is that when we try a new drug it works wonders... until he's on it for a few months and then it just quits working. Increasing the dosage never helps. I think the docs are a little baffled and we're waiting on a consultation from CHEO to see if maybe ADHD was the wrong diagnosis.

He is spending the summer at his dad's, although he has been home for a visit this week. I needed the break, to be honest, and so did his younger brother. I enjoy having him home this week but I'm EXHAUSTED!! He has the energy of 3 people, lol

[ashokia]

Thank you ashokia. I have taken a lot of measures to ensure things are put away so he can't get to them. The problem with him is that when we try a new drug it works wonders... until he's on it for a few months and then it just quits working. Increasing the dosage never helps. I think the docs are a little baffled and we're waiting on a consultation from CHEO to see if maybe ADHD was the wrong diagnosis.

He is spending the summer at his dad's, although he has been home for a visit this week. I needed the break, to be honest, and so did his younger brother. I enjoy having him home this week but I'm EXHAUSTED!! He has the energy of 3 people, lol

My brother was in the program at CHEO. He did extremely well there and when we visited him we always had a great time and he seemed to be a completely different person. But after three months they moved him to group home and he went straight back to his old ways. The people running the group just didn't care enough to make sure the patients were taking their medication and let them all run around wild. He got kicked out and was sent back home. This is when the knife incident occurred.

Now, this was all twenty years ago. I think now people are a lot more educated about what ADD and its related conditions are and how to deal with people who have them. Hopefully you'll be able to find a good support system not just for your son, but for yourself as well. Sometimes just being able to talk to other people who've shared similar experiences as yourself can be a big help in itself.

Enjoy the time off and get mentally prepared for the battle ahead. It's not going to be easy, but from what I've read so far, you're not one to give up easily. *hugs*

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

Thank you again for your kind words! I have done a lot of research on the subject and I hope he can get the help he needs. I just wish the wait wasn't so long to get into CHEO

This is one of the few places where I can talk about it openly. I love my friends but they have "normal" children and they don't understand. My best friend doesn't have children but she thinks it's just a discipline issue- it's not. Discipline is beyond him at the moment.

I won't give up, I want him to have a happy life even if it isn't "normal" but today's standards.

[sweetnlow30]

Ahh, hun I just noticed your post and my heart goes out to you I completely understand where you are coming from. A very long story short, my nine year old son has been diagnosed with severe anxiety and OCD. It was a very long road and a lot of advocating for him to get to where we are today. Please never blame yourself, you are doing all you can for him. Believe me when I say that things will eventually fall into place and you will be in a better position than you are now. It took me two years of hell and being brushed off before we got any help for our son. Do you have a Children's mental Health agency near you? They really helped us a long in our journey when things were at their worst and no one would help us. ((HUGS))

http://www.kidsmentalhealth.ca/

[sheetsofemptycanvas]

Ahh, hun I just noticed your post and my heart goes out to you I completely understand where you are coming from. A very long story short, my nine year old son has been diagnosed with severe anxiety and OCD. It was a very long road and a lot of advocating for him to get to where we are today. Please never blame yourself, you are doing all you can for him. Believe me when I say that things will eventually fall into place and you will be in a better position than you are now. It took me two years of hell and being brushed off before we got any help for our son. Do you have a Children's mental Health agency near you? They really helped us a long in our journey when things were at their worst and no one would help us. ((HUGS))

http://www.kidsmentalhealth.ca/

Thank you for your help! I will look into this, looks like it could be a big help!

Well, I got a call from CHEO and we're still looking at a 2-3 month wait... and we've already been waiting for over a year AND we won't even actually see the therapist- because we live outside of Ottawa we get a video conference Like, wth??? I'm not impressed with the whole thing and things are still going downhill. Even with him spending most of this summer with his dad he's still mean and violent when he come shome. We usually have one good day when he comes home and then it's all back to normal.