What a day yesterday was

[DaveP]

My wife's mom is dying. Soon. The family thinks days, the doctors I spoke with said weeks. We live in Nova Scotia now but she is from Northern Quebec (where I met and married her). Travel prices from Montreal north are outrageous. Not something we can afford. About $2500 return for that portion. I spent most of the day yesterday speaking with various Inuit organizations (My wife is Inuit and the airline that flies from Montreal (First Air) is Inuit owned) and got them to give her free air fare for that portion. Just left us with last minute Nova Scotia to Montreal airfare to pay. $700. Can't really afford that either but this is too important.

She left at 5:00 this morning for the airport and is in Montreal now. I expect she'll be gone for about a month. I'll be here with the 7 kids. Not so bad, they're good kids, but not easy either.

That was one of 3 things yesterday. The second was my 8 year old son walking home from school instead of taking the bus because there's an 11 year old bully wanting to beat him up. My 11 year old daughter does her best to defend him (I taught my kids to stick together and always protect the littler ones). But the bully has friends. My daughter walked home with him, I hate this because we left the north because of this. My kids were tortured up there because they were only half-Inuit. It was horrible. Now some little B* is doing it to one of them here? I called the principal who seemed really concerned and assured me she was immediately calling the boy's parents and urged me to call me if there are any more problems. I hope that's the end of it.

And the third thing was an irate facebook message my wife received from a friend My wife had made a mistake on our cell number, and this friend apparently texted something to the number and the person who actually has that number texted back something highly rude that made our friend think she was cheating with her husband. My wife, bless her heart, didn't know what the heck was going and why she was getting this angry facebook message from our friend. Big misunderstanding all around. My wife messaged her back saying basically 'leave me alone, don't call or write to me.'. Then she showed me her facebook messages from her. Took me a while to figure out how it all happened, and that neither one is at fault. I explained what happened to the friend on facebook and hope it's fixed, but I haven't heard back from her yet.

I was up 26 hours straight yesterday into today. (I've slept since)

I heard someone say once 'I take life one day at a time, but sometimes several days gang up on me". That was yesterday.

Thanks for letting me vent.

[MrsSunshine]

OMGoodness Dave. im so very sorry.. I hope that your wife's mom's time on earth is peaceful.. btdt.. it sucks.. thankfully she has your wife to be there.. what a blessing im sure. your poor kids.. no mom for a month and then this.. by the sounds of it you have it under control.. stay strong as best as you can.. if u need anything let us know.

[hollyquaiscer]

Wow, I'll say that was some few days! I am glad to hear that you were finally able to get some sleep. My thoughts and prayers are with you, your dw and family at this time. I was sadden to hear of yet another bully. When are kids going to get it through their heads, the damage they do to others when they do this. I sure hope that the school takes this seriously and gets the bully under control.

I hope your next few days are a little quieter

[walkonby]

Wow, sometimes things happen in threes, so lets hope that is all there is for a while till you catch your breath.
You sure have a bit of a challenge ahead of you with taking care of all the kids, but like you said this is too important and your DW has to be there. Hoping and praying that whatever time your MIL has left she gets to spend it with plenty of loved ones around her.
As far as that bully situation goes, human nature seems to invite that behaviour despite all the awareness and intervention we try to offer. Mine were also bullied to an extent, so I do feel for your boy.
Hang in there Dave.

[Judstir]

Hope you got some rest Dave. What a good father you are to take on 7 children alone. Sending good vibes and thoughts your way.

[Lynn49]

Oh dear, Dave...Your family will certainly be in my prayers tonight and I pray that your MIL spends her last days in the arms of those who love her so dearly.
As for bullies, it really is time we ALL take this most seriously and do more than just "talk to the parents", although that's certainly where it starts. Don't accept anything less than a full cessation of that kid's behavior. Is there someone who can speak to all the students and staff about bullying and tell them that bullies are insecure little runts who deserve no respect...?

All best wishes, Dave...we love ya and I hope you know that we wish we could do more...

[Natalka]

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[Tantum]

Dave, Sorry to hear about everything going on...having just been through the exact same thing myself I know where your coming from.

My MIL passed away 2 weeks ago, my hubby had gone to be with her with the 2 oldest while I held down the fort with the other 8, then I had to pack us all up to run up (on the bus) with the kids after she passed. It's not easy.

To heck with taking it one day at a time right now, take it hour by hour. Just deal with each issue as it comes up, no more.

Thoughts and prayers that you & your wife have all the strength you need during this difficult time.

[Shwa Girl]

I am sorry to hear all you are experiencing right now.
The bullying incident hits home for me. I don't think it matters where you live now. I hate it when small innocent children are targeted.
Even in my online course I am taking, one of my group members is trying to bully me. I identified it early and took action early.
I hope the principal follows through and puts a stop to it.

Blessings and prayers to you and your family throughout the weekend.

[Crochetlady]

So sorry to hear of your DW mother. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there.

[saddlebag]

Dave sorry to hear of your problems....but you know being from the area we're from there are a lot of stupid ignorant people, and unfortunately the kids learn from their parents. One thing i've enjoyed for my kids since moving here is the organization that your kids attend as well...everyone is equal. Hope days ahead are better for you...

[poppleton]

What a day! Sorry your family is dealing with all that - but what a blessing that the airline was willing to help you out un such an important situation. Praying for you guys, hopefully the bullying situation can be dealt with in a way that actually makes a difference.

[dreamcatcher]

Dave, Blessings and good thoughts from Halifax! I'm glad your wife is able to go and be with her mother now when she needs her. It's a compliment to you that she is able to go and leave you with all the kids. Not everyone can hold down the fort alone like that with so many kids. Good for you! The bullying thing seems to really be becoming a big problem, especially these days in the age of fb and the internet. Don't let it go, it's unacceptable and it should be stopped! I hope the school steps up to the plate and takes it seriously!

[DaveP]

Thank you, all of you, for your kind words and well wishes. What a great community we have here! My wife is safely in the north now, it all worked out, and she's spending time with her mom. Good, so good. As for the bullying thing, the principal seemed really concerned and I'm sure she'll put an end to it. The Cape Breton school board has zero tolerance for this sort of thing. A lot different than I went to school here in the 80s. A definite change for the better.

I remember back in those days I was bullied when I first came to the school in Cape Breton from the north. Grade 8 and I was 12, chubby and an outsider. Great target. Changed quickly, I grew, lost weight and could stand up for myself within a few months. Bullying stopped. And I never bullied in return (I had been bullied in the north as well when I was younger.)

I stuck up for others who were bullied instead.

I'd like to give an example of the effect stopping bullying can have. I'm not advocating smoking here, but this is what happened and I didn't even remember it until my sister mentioned it a few years ago. My sister told me (3 years back) that she met a person and when she introduced herself he asked "are you David's sister?" Yup. The guy remembered me because when I was in grade 11 or 12 I had helped him out. Back then we were allowed to smoke on school grounds and students would gather on breaks at the main entrance (Wow, times were so different back then). Anyway I was out there one day and kid/bully who was probably in grade 10 or so asked a kid in grade 8 for a puff of his cigarette. Then would not give it back and there was nothing the grade 8 kid could do about it. So I (nicely) asked the older kid (not older than me) for a puff of the cig he stole. Thinking I was on his side and participating in his bullying he handed it to me. I then passed the cig back to the kid he stole it from and smiled at the bully. No violence was involved, no angry words, because Mr big bad bully knew I was bigger. And the kid I stuck up for, who I don't even know, remembers me positively to this day. Little things can mean a lot, and I teach my own kids to always stick up for those being bullied. And each other.

[KrazE]