Constant drama...I'm so tired

[RebeccaRYoung]

This is a complicated and long story, so I'm going to try and keep it simple.

Once upon a time there was a girl. She was a very nice and talkative girl. One day she met a man, fell in love, and got married. While both people were incredibly friendly, they were also very prone to jumping to conclusions. Every week something happened that caused strife and difficulty. No matter how anyone conducted themselves, somehow something was said to offend or disgruntle this girl and her husband.

Fast forward 4 years. Each and every week for 4 years there has been some sort of drama. They have been offended by family members, friends, and strangers. People just trying to be nice have been criticized for some sort comment that was taken the wrong way. Each time this happens the girl or her husband become defensive and upset. They then phone all the rest of the family and friends to complain about the horrific event that just happened.

Now fast forward one more time to last week. Again the phone rang. The lovely girl was on the other end of the line waiting to complain about a comment made to her by a stranger at the mall. This stranger was standing in a store waiting for her friend to try on some shirts. The girl came out of the change rooms and encountered this stranger. She looked in the mirror and decided that she did not like the item she was trying on. She went back into the change room and tried on a second item. When she came back out of the change room the stranger stated that this item was far nicer than the first. The girl got upset and defensive. She told the stranger to mind their own business and left the store without purchasing anything.

She then went home and began phoning all her friends about the horrible stranger at the store. She complained about it for an hour, and then went on to call the rest of the family and friends.

I'm now so tired of the constant drama. It's frustrating and tiring to constantly hear about the complaints. I'm not sure I understand what was so horrible about what the stranger did.

[torontogal12]

Did you ask her about what made this stranger horrible? Did she have an answer? Haha she'd be talking for years if she took the toronto subway. I used to know aomeone like this. No longer speak to her after her behaviour nearly spoiled our wedding. Dump her. Its just draining

Btw has her ulcer formed yet. She's gonna get one from making a ridiculous deal out of someone making a helpful comment

[EricsMom]

That is very frustrating and it is very hard to constantly have to deal with negativity. Unfortunately it's not about the event itself, some people just need to create drama - it's the only way they know how to live.

This type of personality won't be open or understanding to you trying to curtail the amount of drama ... no matter how nice they are it's a narcisistic personality that always needs to be the center of drama. It's a no win situation for you.

I feel your pain because I have friends and family just like this. Hugs to you.

[lessthannat]

I would stop answering the phone when this person called

[luckbealady]

I think your "lovely girl" is just an attention seeker. She constantly needs to be validated for the "wrongs" that have been committed against her. It will never stop.

I tend to be one of those people that others like to sound off to. But I will not let someone else's drama drain me. If I wanted to continue to be friends with the girl, I'd start changing the topic whenever she complains, tune her out, or simply tell her than I'm tired of hearing about the horrible things others do to her, and if that's all she wants to talk about than I have to go (of course, now she'll complain about you).

Also, about the clothing incident: that is crazy. To go off on a stranger that actually complimented her, and to think it is some big outrage. If it was me, I'd thank them for their opinion. Whether I agreed with it or not.

[EricsMom]

I think your "lovely girl" is just an attention seeker. She constantly needs to be validated for the "wrongs" that have been committed against her. It will never stop.

I tend to be one of those people that others like to sound off to. But I will not let someone else's drama drain me. If I wanted to continue to be friends with the girl, I'd start changing the topic whenever she complains, tune her out, or simply tell her than I'm tired of hearing about the horrible things others do to her, and if that's all she wants to talk about than I have to go (of course, now she'll complain about you).

DITTO!

[Mia001]

i wonder what she would have done if ....like i was once ask....she was asked by this stranger ' Do you go out sometimes?' lol


lol, i was just waiting in line at the grocery store....lol ....i still laught thinking about it...

[lghend]

I've seen these types stopped short when their listener replies "Oh well.....(in a "whatcha gonna do" manner) and then changes the subject to something positive.

[RebeccaRYoung]

I enjoy some of the suggestions. I have definitely checked called ID before to make sure it isn't her. I'm not necessarily able to just stop seeing her, as she is a close family member, however, I like the idea of just shrugging and changing the subject. Hopefully it'll work next time I see her.

Today was yet another drama for her. She decided to change jobs today. It's always something!

[sharkie]

[nicolthepickle]

I'm guessing this person has family issues from when she was younger. She seems to need to put others down by disrespecting their "strange" behaviour.

[SavenRaven]

Bahhaha. "The Drama Llama"... Love it!

[BCCouponClipper]

i remember hearing......misery loves company....and this is only most fitting according to what you're saying. Friendship is a 2 way street and if you and everyone eles is just a dumping ground for her emotional baggage then I would be reassessing my friendship.

[torontogal12]

Too bad she is a family member that you can't just avoid. I'd say dodge her calls or do what lghend said. Just say "wow, some people are so rude. On to other things..."

[Ciel]

A stranger's comment in clothing store gives the "nice girl" (she's not really nice, she's in denial about her behaviour and the effects on others-she might also have a medical issue but is not aware of it) over 1 hour of complaint time.

The next time you unfortunately hear her complain, see what happens when you say: "whenever one small thing upsets you, you spent over an hour telling EVERYONE how offended you were. SHould any important major thing upset you, you'd save time for everyone by telling them where to see the rock musical version of the story. EVERYONE has reason to be offended by you and your husband because of the umpteen times you called to complain. Hope you have a cheque handy because I want $$$$$$ from you for the "free" time you took up from me." Then end the conversation and find a better way to spend your time. Maybe other family will congratulate you when they find out.