Coping with holidays/social events while bereaved or grieving

[Ciel]

Christmas and other holiday celebrations or even social events can be difficult for people who have recently lost someone close to them or are still grieving the loss of a dear friend or loved family member. I've noticed some activities in the Hamilton/Burlington area that may be of help. Will post a link to coping strategies that people can refer to when assessing when to say no or yes to participating in a social event or activity.
>Family Tree of Lights event: http://bfo-hamiltonburlington.on.ca/ Light preorder required. >Memorial tree light program and church mass on Dec. 15 (must preorder light if you want one on the tree) http://www.thespec.com/events/699126...mp-tree-light/ >Helping to support someone with loss and coping with the holidays: http://smithsfh.com/Client_Care_-57507.html
* SCers, please post memorial or remembrance or coping activities in your area/province/territories.

Some funeral homes provide annual or semi-annual remembrance services that are open to the public and may require an RSVP.

[Ciel]

The Friends in Grief support network at a Hamilton funeral home has a posted reading resource list for anyone who is bereaved or helping someone going through bereavement. http://www.friendsingrief.ca/pdfs/be..._resources.pdf

[Skippy]

Thank you for starting this thread and providing the links which will be helpful to many.

[Ciel]

I am aware of two upcoming talks on grief that may be of interest to residents in the Hamilton, ON area:

Bay Gardens will have two speakers (one in the afternoon and one in the evening). The evening session will assist individuals who are Coping with the Holidays. http://baygardens.ca/index.php/event...17-11-29-19-00

At the Sherwood Library branch on Dec. 7 (morning), there is a coping with the holidays and grief presentation. http://www.hpl.ca/coping-holidays-an...ate=2017-12-07

I looked at the Bereaved Families of Ontario website-the Hamilton location moved. The list of their fall and winter programs is shown here: http://bfo-hamiltonburlington.on.ca/our-programs

Dr. Kemp Hospice runs the Camp Erin bereavement camp for kids in the late spring. https://kemphospice.org/children-s-support-programs

I am glad I know of local resources as word reached me today that someone in our extended relation circle has passed away. There are young children in the family, so they may at some point learn of local programs to assist them in the loss of their parent.

[Ciel]

On Twitter, this day is one of many themed days including #griefdayCA2017. There's a bilingual resource to help kids and teens with grief: kidsgrief.ca or deuildesenfants.ca

https://twitter.com/VirtualHospice/s...99235821174784

[cath007]

Thank you @Ciel for making this thread.I know the first year my brother died it was a Christmas memorie ceremony with songs and remembering witch I did not attemp because I was just so sad and dont have the power to go to it,was too much emotional(but I watched the ceremony in local tv)....this year I dont know but I avoid them ....I did not go to my brother 2 part of incinerating and putting in soil because i had not the power,,,feel guilty but I had to think about my own health

[MillieH]

We all have to do it our own way..After the nightmare of last year.. This year I'm not forcing it to happen anymore. We are not decorating or have an exchange of gifts.. We will do Christmas Eve stuff with my son and girlfriend.. and then have my daughter her husband and our son for supper on Christmas day.. I plan on nabbing cesear Salad and rotessorie chicken from RCSS for that...

[Ciel]

I agree with the remarks that everyone has to grieve in their own way. I happen to pick up the local Coffee News and the funeral home in Ancaster is doing its annual Christmas memorial service on Dec. 12.
Last year's event is listed on their Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/DBAncaster

[avoncallingu]

Thank-you, Ciel. You are always thinking of others. My grief counselor and I were discussing these things today. I have to admit that I hadn't stopped to think my way through the holidays.

Many of my friends are going away on holidays. I looked up an opportunity to do some gift wrapping at a local mall for a charity. I have not done this before, but I love wrapping gifts. It will get me out and keep me busy when I want to be busy.

Christmas should be good with my brother 's family but I have decided to be very flexible about New Years. Don't want to spend the night at a bar listening to music as many of my friends are. May pick a local pub just to get out for supper and then binge-watch some of the programs we have been recording.

Thanks again!

[Tweets77]

Even if it has been 31 years....

[Skippy]

Even if it has been 31 years....

I hear you and indeed we all have our own ways of dealing with the situation.We will get through it all,thanks in part to the sharing and encouragement of these posts.

[Skippy]

Sunday December 10,2017@2:00 P.M.
Kingsview United Church
505 Adelaide Ave.E.(at Wilson Rd.N.)Oshawa
Dr. Bill Webster "Helpful hints for handling the holidays"
To have your loved one's name listed in the order of service contact McIntosh-Anderson-Kellam Funeral Home(905)433-5558 by Nov.29,2017.

I personally know the speaker and have previously attended the services.Any questions feel free to post or PM.

[Lynn49]

A timely thread indeed, @Ciel , and an important one.

I had a weepy day yesterday, missing my Parents, my Brother who passed away last summer, and two best Friends who were like sisters to me, who passed many years apart....I have a few of those a month or so before Christmas.

However, I guess I do deal with grief differently: I grieve in private, but I've always loved Christmas, as my family and friends have never had to doubt, and I know that they're still looking at me and my Christmas preparations and excitement and smiling. Knowing them as I do, they wouldn't expect me or want me to withdraw and be sad this time of the year and miss the joy we all shared when we shared it together. I also have our Daughter and her family, particularly our Grandson to continue to make beautiful memories with, and so life goes on.

I hope you all find your own paths to peace and comfort this Christmas.

[Skippy]

Please Delete

[Skippy]

Sorry about the short notice,but I just found out about this today:

A Free seminar/support group for adults who are grieving the loss of a loved one.
A survival guide and refreshments will be provided.
College Park Church
1164 King St.E.
Oshawa