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[jasperandchar]

House Guests who think they are at the Holiday Inn

Our family of 4 has now evolved to 7;

I expected 5 (brother-in-law is staying with us who is 34 years old while in-laws house is being built) and now mother & father in law make 7 mouths to feed, 3 people who don't pick up after themselves.

I mean how hard is it to put your freakin' pop can (my pop) in the recycle box, or tuck in your chair).

So since my brother-in-law moved in in Sept. our hydro bill has gone up $70.00 (sigh) he is paying us weekly so dh has asked him to turn lights, fans, etc off when not in the room.

DH's income has been reduced by $1400.00 a month (not pocket change too say the least) and I am not feeding 7 people, not to mention that I am providing 98.9% of the food. Mother & father in-law are not paying and not cooking or doing dishes or anything else for that matter.

I am about to go ape- if you get my drift. Can't keep enough food made or in the fridge as it vanishes.

I was raised very independently, my parents when bankrupt when I was 8 so we had no $ and I hate having bills but needless to say we are now accumulating bills as dh's income has been substantially reduced.

So I am doing everything to cut corners, stretch meals, buy groceries, trading coupons over SC like crazy, tightening our belts, no take out or deli suppers and I just plainly feel like my inlaws think they are at the freakin' HOLIDAY INN!!!

I am not a person who asks for help because I have not had much success in my life when I've asked for help regardless of the situation.

DH and I were talking the other day that it was time to put our excess firewood for sale, so I went to the store to put up a sign and guess who's sign is there (in-laws) dh and I were talking about this yesterday am and I told him I would go and put the sign up today (yesterday) but I couldn't leave the house because of Bell Canada phone issues/service. I then yesterday am see my mother in law making signs and I go to my husband and freak out, he says don't worry about it. I flipped, who the hell do they think they are stealing our ideas and our bread & butter, etc.

We told my inlaws months ago that they were charging too much for their firewood, it seems that yesterday they decided to drop their price and guess who's phone # they have on their sign (hello....ding ding you guessed right).

SO now at the same store their are 2 signs 1 for us and 1 for them with the same phone # but different names (duh) what frig is that.

I have 2 kids and a husband to look after and they have themselves and grown adult.

Anyways tonight I have 4 steaks out for dinner, my mother & father in law are just going to have to get off their Holiday Inn asses because there is no dinner service tonight!


Thanks for reading


Dinner update - I was aw struck because;

like I said I only had 4 steaks but I still had a few pork chops left over from the day before. So I'm getting the rice ready, veggies, getting
steak ready to go out and BBQ when MIL says oh steak, I said ya and I only have 4 for 5 people, she then says I'm going to warm up the leftovers and I said well I need the pork chops as 5 people cannot eat 4 small steaks (3 adults - 2 men, me + 2 boys 11 and 9 years old), she says well then I'll just go ahead and warm up all the other stuff (I gave her the dirtiest look and took what I wanted to keep and moved it to another shelf)and put stuff in front of it.

So my in-laws warmed up my 2 chicken drumsticks with my gravy and patatoes and was asking if had any steak or pork chops left and I said no and dumped the rest of the rice on my plate and walked away.

I mean what the hell is wrong with people. No shame and too lazy!!!!

[natynat]

Lol @ the last part. But so frustrating @ the rest. I know what it's like to be raised in a family without much available. Like you, I hate bills, and I do everything to save money...especially because I'm in University full-time and can only work 20 hours, and my boyfriend doesn't have the best income in the world. The whole idea of having in-laws over is horrible. I wouldn't personally charge them for rent or electricity, but I WOULD expect them to clean up, help around the house, and pitch in for the groceries because they are eating the food. It's rediculous that they expect you to do everything...and the whole thing with the firewood is rediculous. I really sympathize with you...I hope that you and your DH and the inlaws can all sit down and perhaps make a chart of responsibilities (as childish as it sounds) and explain to them that you cannot support 7 people without some sort of financial help. I do hope that things get better!

[MrsSunshine]

wow sounds like their welcome was worn out before they moved out. *bleep* like that wouldn't happen in my house. out they go. no if and's or butts about it. sorry but boundary lines were crossed and some ppl need to grow up. just like you did.

[MommyMelanie2007]

Kind of reminds me when my in laws come to visit. My almost 5 year old has autism and only sleeps a few hours a night, if at all. So I am running on steam most days. and my in laws will come and expect me to do everything. When I visit them I offer to help all day. When they come here they sit in the living room till dinner and I call them. I feel like Denny's, calling them in for dinner.I am tired the last thing I need is double the mouths to feed and clean up after. I dont know how you do it. I only do it for a few days a few times a year, cant imagine them living with me

[IMLN]

awww, breath a painful situation, i feel for you. Let us know how dinner goes

[BC Gal]

Imo, it's never good to let people stay at your house for more than a couple days. Not sure how long they are to stay there, but if it's more than a month, maybe them finding somewhere to rent would be better. The upsetness they would feel from being told to move out would be less than the long term damage that might be caused by them staying (ie. damage to your friendship with them).

I sure hope it gets better for you

[momof5boys]

Here is what I would do - instead of talking about it with your in laws, you and your husband need to write down the rules and present them with the facts. If they have a paper in front of them they can read and re read it and it may sink in that there has to be some motivation on their part to pitch in with the bills.

[Eva-M]

Imo, it's never good to let people stay at your house for more than a couple days. Not sure how long they are to stay there, but if it's more than a month, maybe them finding somewhere to rent would be better. The upsetness they would feel from being told to move out would be less than the long term damage that might be caused by them staying (ie. damage to your friendship with them).

I sure hope it gets better for you

I agree. The best way is to have your husband talk to them and help them find a place for "their best" asap.

[lghend]

I feel for you and I give all of you credit for opening your homes to relatives. I am so lucky that I don't have the room. I just freeze up when I have people over, I can't be preparing meals, cooking, cleaning etc. when I have an audience. I'm weird, I know.

[jasperandchar]

Dinner update - I was aw struck because;

like I said I only had 4 steaks but I still had a few pork chops left over from the day before. So I'm getting the rice ready, veggies, getting
steak ready to go out and BBQ when MIL says oh steak, I said ya and I only have 4 for 5 people, she then says I'm going to warm up the leftovers and I said well I need the pork chops as 5 people cannot eat 4 small steaks (3 adults - 2 men, me + 2 boys 11 and 9 years old), she says well then I'll just go ahead and warm up all the other stuff (I gave her the dirtiest look and took what I wanted to keep and moved it to another shelf)and put stuff in front of it.

So my in-laws warmed up my 2 chicken drumsticks with my gravy and patatoes and was asking if had any steak or pork chops left and I said no and dumped the rest of the rice on my plate and walked away.

I mean what the hell is wrong with people. No shame and too lazy!!!!

awww, breath a painful situation, i feel for you. Let us know how dinner goes

[jasperandchar]

It was supposed to be 2 weeks and now I'm told end of November!!!

My little guy 9 years old is sleeping on his mattress in his brothers room.

Imo, it's never good to let people stay at your house for more than a couple days. Not sure how long they are to stay there, but if it's more than a month, maybe them finding somewhere to rent would be better. The upsetness they would feel from being told to move out would be less than the long term damage that might be caused by them staying (ie. damage to your friendship with them).

I sure hope it gets better for you

[KrazE]

Tell them that they will need to stay in a hotel as of Friday because your immediate family comes first. The added costs of 3 additional adults in your home is not affordable, and unless they are willing to start paying for the increase in utilities and food, it's best that they leave.

[Insane]

Since it's going to be so long, perhaps your hubby needs to speak to them about contributing financially to the household or finding a more permanent place to stay.

I between you and me I totally would have taken down their firewood sign at the grocery store!

[littlenom]

Wow, I feel for you, seriously. I would be mental by now. There's nothing I can't stand more than lazy adults who think they are owed the world. I think out of gratitude for a free stay most people would at least be making your dinner every night...I am so sorry and I hope that you and your hubby come to an agreement that you can live with. After all, he married you, you didn't marry his parents.

[nicolthepickle]

*hugs*
Tell us how the steak dinner works out.