funeral etiquette?

[kris10]

On Monday i found out my old friend/ sort of x ( we went out for like 2 seconds, i dont remember exactly what went wrong) died of cancer at just 23. We hadn't really talked since we were maybe 15ish,maybe 16ish except maybe once a few years back. But i really felt a lot of remorse and feel the need to say goodbye. I was shocked cuz i had no idea and it really makes me wish i kept in touch so badly. I talked to his best friend and he didn't seem to mind. Do you think it is ok to go to his funeral or inappropriate cuz its been so long?it didn't say it was a private thing or anything. I still can not believe i will never see him again.

Also if so any idea if it is ok to bring my 2 and a half year old along if we just sorta sit near the back in case she gets fussy?She is usually decently behaved. I wasn't aware the funeral was tomorrow and its kind of short notice. thank u.

[Miss_April]

Kris, I would say it is okay for you to go. A funeral is about saying goodbye and like you said you need to, also his best friend said its alright so don't feel strange about. I'm sure bringing your son is fine if your going to sit at the back.

Sorry about your loss, even if it seems minimal.

[couponjunkie]

it's okay it brings support to the family and that's what they need now

[Natalka]

Totally fine for you to attend the funeral, but I sure would advise you against taking your child - it would be different if it were a family funeral.
So sorry about your friend....

[AmberLab]

I think it is fine for you to go and pay your respects. I don't think you should take your child however. I have a two year old myself and had a recent death in our family - I didn't attend and stayed home with him.

[avoncallingu]

I think the family would appreciate that you wanted to pay your respects. If it were me, I might get a babysitter. If you can't make it, a card would be very appropriate. It's very tough for the family when they lose someone so young and I'm sure they need all the support they can get from family and friends old and long standing.

It's amazing how the loss of some people, even sometimes people we don't know can affect us. It shows our humanity and interconnectedness. It's very kind that you are so caring.

[matrix82]

I think it is appropriate.

[Tuktu60]

I would definitely go - the family will appreciate it for sure. I would probably not bring the little one - if they kick up a fuss it can be upsetting to the family. I remember a crying baby at my brother's funeral and it was a complete distraction and I thought it was kind of disrespectful to be interrupting the service. Just my opinion

[jenna321]

Go for yourself and to pay respect to your friend's family it will be appreciated. As for your child, entirely your choice most funeral homes have a section with toys outside the chapel and you still here the service if child gets cranky.

[thecountess]

Very sorry for your loss

[madchives]

well, i'm sorry to hear about this, kris, and if you want to go
and it's not 'just family and close friends', i'd go.
i do think like others that your daughter, shouldn't.

[msporkchop]

If you feel you need to be there to say goodbye and get some closure than definatly go. I'm sure his folks will appreciate your support. But Leave the baby at home. Taking the baby will only distract you from the reason you are there.

[frugal.tea]

Sorry to hear about the loss of your friend I don't think it is inappropriate for you to attend the funeral. Although you DD is well-behaved, I would suggest not taking her with you because she may be uncomfortable at the funeral and may become more fussier than usual.

[D-Roc]

Go, but do not bring your kid. That would be completely inappropriate and inconsiderate.

[Lynn49]

So sorry for your loss.....And I must agree with the posters who said it's more than appropriate for you to go, but to please leave your little one with a sitter.