Time For A Bragging Rules Discussion

[jandbby]

My suggestion is that we have a "how to make a brag post" template, stickied in the bragging section. Posts would ideally include deal (and expiry if any), stores (location optional), flyers price-matched, coupons used and any other information the OP feels like sharing. Quantities bought, percentage saved etc should be entirely optional. Also no defensive statements like "...so don't attack me" or "no shelves were cleared" or "the cashier didn't notice". Also a YYMV disclaimer should make it clear to any new couponers that not all brags can be replicated.

A brag should be whatever the OP feels is worth bragging about.

The "What's your best deal this week" thread is a good example what the bragging section should be modeled after. People just post whatever good deals they found and there's hardly any drama. The Safeway Airmiles thread (#millionviews #OperaBob), is another positive, respectful thread on this site, that is self regulating.

Personally when I read the brag section, I am looking to learn something and I sometimes go out and get the same deal, or I not. It doesn't bother me any. One could always get a rain-check if the deal is that important and deals do come around again. I am just grateful that some people find these deals and are generous enough to share them with the rest of the community.

However, I agree with other posters that being overly sensitive is not called for on a public forum and this goes for brag posters and responders. We can agree to disagree.

I really do not know why people buy the quantities that they do nor is it any of my business. There are "shelf-clearers" in every city and they are not all active posters on this forum. To jump all over someone's brag because shelves in another city were cleared or someone couldn't get the same deal themselves could be seen as judgmental.

So THANKS very much to all who post brags in this (my favourite) sub-forum of SC. Your hard work is much appreciated.

[terrarankin]

I think some posters should keep their high and mighty opinions to themselves. Im so sick of reading it more and more often.
"I would never do that" "you are wrong, I am right"
The OP is not asking you if you would do what they did, they are just sharing the great deal they got. Im sick of reading peoples opinions of HOW the deal was achieved. No one cares to read about your negative opinion, we read the brag posts to read about the BRAG, not someone else's personal "moral coupon" opinion.
I very rarely bother posting brags anymore.
No one is bragging about doing anything illegal. If a stores system or manager ALLOWS something, then I guess IT IS ALLOWED. YMMV. Whatever.
Are you telling me that a rule has never been bent for you. For example I bet that there have been times where you have used more than 1 coupon (one per customer) because cashier let you or you went through multiple times? I am sure there are many examples of ways we have all had the coupon rules bent for us in one way or another. How is "one little white lie" different from another?
Don't come down on someone for buying multiples either. I got over 200 can of free soup at Zehrs a few months ago. Guess where 95% of it went? Food bank and shelters. Don't assume the worst of people.
To each their own and leave it at that.
I say POSITIVE COMMENTS only. or just don't post anything. How hard it that?

[sixballoons]

The difficulty here is that ethics can be a matter of opinion or personal standards. While one couponer believes something is fine, it can be a major turnoff to another. I believe we each have our own stances, but overall, when I see negativity or something I don't agree with, it turns me off from both posting and reading.

It is a fine line though. I feel that if stores accept something, or the system accepts it, it is the same as Target mis-pricing the cheese. Businesses have a responsibility for having their systems being correct. Do we decline SCOP's and point out higher prices when things scan in incorrectly in our favour? But that is my outlook, everyone's is different.

I do feel uncomfortable reading brags where massive quantities are purchased from stores, as I personally feel that is not the intent of the coupons. Just because that still counts as following the rules, I do not agree it is appropriate. Obviously some would agree and some would disagree, we are all individuals here with different opinions!

My recommendation to others, if you see something you don't like and want to call someone out on it, I prefer to have that done offline rather than on a public message board where it quickly turns into a flame war with hurt feelings and SCers taking sides. I think it gets ugly fast, and I prefer not to see that on this forum. My opinion only.

[hannahtjmom]

Vey well said sixballoons!

[Patty Smyth]

I believe that if someone intentionally misused a coupon, they probably wouldn't brag about their crime! I always believe them to be genuine errors. I myself have made mistakes before. If the couponer and the cashier both understood a coupon in the same way, it was likely confused wording.

I think that there should be a positive comments only rule.

Making note of misuse should be for the purpose of the readers, not to hassle the OP.

And, I think that the brag section could be a little friendlier towards shelf clearers. If I have 100 coupons for 100 free products, and I know I can use them, or give them to people who can, them Im gonna clear!!!! If the store has a problem with that, they will stop me. Otherwise, I'm not breaking any rules.

If you have 100 coupons for an item you can always talk to the manager and he can pre-order. I have spoken to the manager at my WM when my DD was looking for Mtl. Canadiens memorabilia during the cup frenzy and he actually called another store to have it shipped to his. So if he can do that for one item I am certain they can order an extra few cases of something.

[GeorgiaK]

I believe that we need to have some basic rules of engagement. If you post a brag that someone else "calls you out on" or better to say"questions your use of coupons", please don't get defensive. As I have stated before, we are all trying to learn the ins and outs of using coupons and need to question or express differing opinions. This healthy debate is what I think this forum used to be about. As well, if the people who have more experience couponing don't give the newbies a heads up as to the validity of their use of coupons, then we will have the continuing deterioration of coupon values and of the stores' policies. I don't want to walk into a store and have the staff not wanting to serve me because I use coupons, all because they have had very bad experiences with couponers.

If you are using coupons incorrectly (intentionally or not), and BRAG about it, then be prepared to be questioned.

Sixballoons mentioned calling out the OP offline or in a pm. This defeats the purpose. We need to be open to criticism and questioning, it serves to improve our collective knowledge. We should also remember that the visitors to this site who read our posts far out number the number of members. We should also remember that we are an example or "role models" of what couponers are. Don't have the public think we are dishonest or rude or fraudulent.

As to how we can help the situation: I think that the report button works quite well. I have and will report posters who post not-so-legit brags. Maybe we can all do the same and then let the mods take over from there.

[CrazyQT]

I love the brag section. I have learned of deals I would have otherwise missed out on. Certain people have more time to scope out the deals and pair them up with coupons and I find that sharing them with SC saves me time that I don't always have to search for the best deal.

Sometimes I skip over deals because they are not so cut and dry and occasionally require doing something shady to obtain the deal. (a lot of this lately) I can do without those types of brags but I don't comment on those brags one way or the other. I learned my lesson in a not so pleasant way

I guess the way I feel is if you feel the slightest bit guilty about the deals and brags you have scored then maybe you didn't get them honestly and the way the manufacturer/company set out for you to receive the deal.

[torontogal12]

Am I missing something? I don't see a lot of negative comments in the brags anymore. Unless the mods clean them up before I see them.

What I do see is a lot of people asking the OP to explain the deal. This is not to be judgmental, but to be useful to others.

Any time I see a brag where someone says "I bought ALL THIS FOR $1!" (you know, those brags with just a picture and one sentence explanation that doesn't even say which store they went to, let alone coupons, PMs)? You bet I'll ask them how they did it. I am not being mean. I just want us all to get in on it too. And if it's not a legit deal, then it will come out in their explanation and their brag should be removed.

I agree with scbpooh that people really only want to see the brags where they explain the ONE $2 item they got for free, rather than the entire grocery shop they got for $10. I don't care about someone getting 25 bottles of X for free. But I do care about getting three days worth of groceries for $10. I think Coupon Girl's brags are great models. She posts brags about real groceries or clothing, not just one offs.

Regarding misuse:


If someone gives away that they misused a coupon then the brag should be removed to discourage others from copying. But some people on this site can be very judgmental and accuse the OP of things before the OP has even had a chance of responding. I've said it before: I would not wish anyone to be before a jury made up of SCs because people are often guilty automatically.

Of the ideas mentioned, I think the template is useful.

But when there are accusations of "you abused this coupon" I think those should be PMed directly to the mods for them to decide what is legit and what isn't (sorry for suggesting more work, but why accuse people publicly when you have no proof).

[BCcheapMom]

I think there is a big difference between a business or system allowing something and someone taking advantage of a cashier's ignorance - we see this all the time at Target, we saw it when Save of Foods allowed stacking - I agree that we all have our own personal ethics on this issue, I have seen brags where someone clearly knew they were in the worn, where people made a mistake (totally fine, we all make mistakes - and learn from them!) and where people tried something they were unsure of (like SDM and it's very intricate system) and were successful - learned something knew that we all learned from.

If someone doesn't like to find out that they made a mistake, don't post.

And no, I have never 'bent the rules', cheated on the per person rule, etc. - and

[annedougherty]

Brags are not a contest, and misusing coupons to "win"...NOT COOL. Let's be honest, there are people who misuse coupons and brag. Most of us who realize it as misuse, just don't comment. For those who are new to this, they may not realize it as misuse, and think it's totally legitimate. A brag should be something that others can emulate. When you are the only one bragging about something you are doing with coupons at x store, that for some reason no one else seems to be doing, this is obviously not something that others can emulate, and if that's the case, it shouldn't be bragged about it.

[FallenPixels]

Am I missing something? I don't see a lot of negative comments in the brags anymore. Unless the mods clean them up before I see them.

We often remove comments, this forum probably gets more modding (other than general spam) than any of the other forums on SC

What I do see is a lot of people asking the OP to explain the deal. This is not to be judgmental, but to be useful to others.

Any time I see a brag where someone says "I bought ALL THIS FOR $1!" (you know, those brags with just a picture and one sentence explanation that doesn't even say which store they went to, let alone coupons, PMs)? You bet I'll ask them how they did it. I am not being mean. I just want us all to get in on it too. And if it's not a legit deal, then it will come out in their explanation and their brag should be removed.

Often they truly are just asking, and the person asking gets upset because people then turn on them for "not being positive"
I mean its real life, we are not all positive all of the time.
I also tend to side with the person who asked bc if you get that upset over someone saying "hey what coupon did you use?" you likely were misusing it (obviously there are some that do outright say "you ripped the store off / misused the coupon / whatever else" but there are also quite a few posters who start their threads with "I know I shouldn't have done it but..." or "don't judge me but..." - generally these are the ones that people will reply negatively to.

[annedougherty]

I love the brag section. I have learned of deals I would have otherwise missed out on. Certain people have more time to scope out the deals and pair them up with coupons and I find that sharing them with SC saves me time that I don't always have to search for the best deal.

Sometimes I skip over deals because they are not so cut and dry and occasionally require doing something shady to obtain the deal. (a lot of this lately) I can do without those types of brags but I don't comment on those brags one way or the other. I learned my lesson in a not so pleasant way

I guess the way I feel is if you feel the slightest bit guilty about the deals and brags you have scored then maybe you didn't get them honestly and the way the manufacturer/company set out for you to receive the deal.

I find that people who make the honest mistakes are the only ones who feel guilty lol. And honest mistakes happen to everyone. I find that some who misuse coupons are the most defensive of what they post, which brings us to these discussions.

[FallenPixels]

I also think it is important to remember that stores read SC (and all of the other couponing blogs), some of them even have usernames and reply from time to time

Non-legit brags do get seen and it can impact the way we shop. As BCcheapMom mentioned, issues have impacted stacking at Save on Foods, Walmarts changing back to local pricematching from national PMing etc

[theo44]

I enjoy reading the brags. The 90% savings ones and the $2.50 cents saved on a $50 receipt ones. Like another poster mentioned we are sharing our personal wins.

I am uncomfortable reading brags where there is misuse or 'shelf-clearing' behaviour. Just because you can obtain x amount of cents off coupons doesn't mean that you should be greedy. I know everyone has different sets of morals. If I had 10 kids I may be inclined to get 100 cans of beans with coupons but I only have 3 people in my household so that's not going to happen.

I think that it should still be positive comments only but positive comments can be written in such a way to deter posting of certain behaviours.

And I am not a fan of using coupons to get stuff for free just to give to charity. Most, if not all, large corporations have their own charitable giving schemes. If you don't have money to donate hard goods then donate your time.

[SavvyLady]

I love the brag section and I do learn from the threads..there are some deals I would not have known about if it wasn't about the brag section..we all have are own way of couponing and we all have our own reason for doing it..if someone wants to buy 1 or 100 I guess that's up to them, I personally feel 100 or clearing shelves is not right ( even if they are giving it to charity) it would be nice to leave some products for other people..I believe the manufacturers want to give us a deal for a product so maybe next time we will buy it..I believe it is also up to the store's to limit coupons or quantities, but if they don't do that then I guess it's fair game!! I have never judged anyone or gave a negative response on the forum. I only hope that buying a huge amount of an item it doesn't expire and have to be thrown out..also, I have really cut back on couponing for many reasons, and I only take coupons I know I will use..Finally, I believe everyone is entitled to their brag, if I don't agree with it I don't respond!!