Teens Curfew

[Minou]

10 pm on weeknights and 11-12 on weekends, depending what's going on. Any later, and you're likely to have the bar crowd out on the road on weekends, making driving more dangerous.

[surfacerising]

Well I'm only 23, but in my case growing up: At around that age, on a school night, I had to be in by 9-10. On weekends midnight if they didn't know who's house I was at, didn't care when if they knew where I was and that parents were home. I was never allowed opposite sex sleep over's either! Even a sleep over a girl friend's house needed supervision, and the other parents saying yes it was happening. I also wasn't allowed out nights my parents knew parties were happen. They were strict in a way I guess, but nothing too crazy with those rules.

[<3 My $aving$ <3]

My son has never had a curfew, here's why!
When he was 16 he started Working at The Keg as a Dishwasher.
Often times he'd work til 1am and still had school the next morning!
IMHO curfew should be based more on the child than the age.
Some kids are more responsible than others.

To me personally, there are other "battles" that are worth waging
(smoking, drinking rec drug use)
Good luck with finding a middle ground!
In this day and age i know its hard,
esp when we know they are safer at home than out n about day/night!

[mwieler]

Growing up, I always had to be home by 10pm, and only 2 days a week, Wednasdays and Sundays and sometimes Fridays. I have never regreted it. I personally think that 12am is too long,especially if he is still in school, and/or has to get up at 6:30. Really, whats the point to staying out that late anyways? Most of what goes no that late is drugs, drinking and/or sex. When my kids get older, i think they will have the same curfew as my hubby and I had, growing up.
They can have all the fun they want to have by 10pm - 10:30pm. Thats my view.

[krysta lynne]

I never in my life had a curfew or rules, and i was a little hell raiser. i would definitely recommend very strict boundaries. whatever you choose those to be. at 18 years old i would thing no later than 1 or 2am. but always make sure they know that if they need a ride or anything you will be there. not to freak out on them, but to give them that ride.

sigh. i think if i had had some boundaries i would have made some wiser choices, but my parents were just as wild as i was. so its kind of hard for me to give good advice on this. but i know i would have been better behaved if i know my parents were serious.

[jayne_a]

my curfew was 9pm and in bed by 10pm on school nights, and no curfew on weekends. As long as i made good grades and didn't come home pregnant, they were ok with it. ( I think they trusted me more, b/c i was the only one who got these curfews) Besides, my mom always bought me my own alcohol that that nothing could be added to it by a stranger. And the rule was take a blanket in the car, so i could sleep in it with the doors locked. She'd rather i call home drunk and say i'm sleeping in my car, then having an rcmp knock on the door.

[Hailley]

My parent's always went with an hour after it's dark out - but that didn't work out when the days get shorter and longer.
So they seemed to adjust it as need be.
School nights it was 9pm, no questions.
Friday and Saturday nights was more flexible, and I could spend the night places because I lived in the country because it was a pretty far drive anywhere.

I think that keeping an early night expectation can be beneficial just to keep expectations in line!


Also - if you have a min. Check out my post on Back to School Shopping!!

[carmanelectric]

I don't really have curfews for my kids (but shhhhhhhhh! they haven't realized it yet). This is how the deal goes;

- I need to know where they are going and who they are with. Either they can or cannot go
- I need to know an ETA for coming home. If it is a long stretch, I want regular check ins either by phone or in person or a combination.
- I have also expressed that if they behave irresponsibly while out and about they will have that privilege tightened up.
- Finally my secret weapon for encouraging my older kids to come home early, is to make them take the 3 year old out with em. She is a dampener on irresponsible fun that my older kids might be tempted to engage in. She gets tired and grumpy if kept up too late and she will tell me everything they did.

[lucy16076]

I don't really have curfews for my kids (but shhhhhhhhh! they haven't realized it yet). This is how the deal goes;

- I need to know where they are going and who they are with. Either they can or cannot go
- I need to know an ETA for coming home. If it is a long stretch, I want regular check ins either by phone or in person or a combination.
- I have also expressed that if they behave irresponsibly while out and about they will have that privilege tightened up.
- Finally my secret weapon for encouraging my older kids to come home early, is to make them take the 3 year old out with em. She is a dampener on irresponsible fun that my older kids might be tempted to engage in. She gets tired and grumpy if kept up too late and she will tell me everything they did.

I agree with this for the most part...might be a stretch if I insisted my oldest take my youngest everywhere with her I don't have curfews for my children either. THey are 13 & almost 16. They ask when to be home & I tell them depending on where they are going & with whom. If they are out after dark, I ask that they be "IN" a house not walking or biking around in the dark. If my oldest is going to a party, I keep in touch periodically with the cell & I insist on driving her both ways. I guess it depends on how responsible your children are, their maturity level, their friends, the light of day, the plans for the next day, your threshold, & how much trust you have in them. Defining a set time hasn't been an issue with me as my children both seem to understand their responsibilites to be rested for the next day. You can't watch them 24-7 so giving them a bit of responsibility once they earn that right, is a way to allow them fun time with their friends without being too controlling. There is trouble to get into out there, but I believe if you've raised them well so they understand right from wrong, most times your voice will enter their minds when the decisions get tough!

[carmanelectric]

My oldest 2 are the same age as yours, 13 and 16. My oldest is actually past the point that I make her take a little kid with her, because she has earned a high degree of trust. But she did tote her littlest brother around. My oldest son is 13 and he makes me more nervous, not that he is prone to getting into trouble. He's just a cutey and there is a constant line of girls swooning over him. He totally revels in that attention. So his little sister is great, he has to say no to the pressure of fooling around, and is still cute and doesn't come across as a jerk cause he is with his little sister. It's a great system. But I guess that tactic will end soon enough as I don't have anymore younger children. I don't let my kids go to parties though. I actually have never been asked. I generally try to help keep my kids entertained enough that parties aren't appealing

[lucy16076]

I'm finding that not all parents have the same care & concern over their own children! I allowed my daughter to go to a "Back to School" party in August, which turned out to be a horrible choice, as there were kids passed out on lawns, kids fighting, & way too many kids in one yard! The mother allowed her son to invite "a few" friends....well...he posted on Facebook about his party & it got out of control.............so...............luckily my daughter didn't get involved in the trouble but when she asked to go to another party in a "seedy" part of town, this time the answer was "no." I now have stricter rules that I follow before saying "yes." A friend of a friend doesn't count anymore. I guess it's a learning process all around...

[gspmamma]

I was going to let my daughter make her own choices on the weekends about her curfew. As long as she was going to let me know were she was and let me know about what time she would be home. (in my mind nothing past 1 a.m since she was asking for a 12:00 curfew) Well after what happened this week she is back to an 11 p.m curfew on weekends 10 on weeknights. Sadly a boy that she would of been graduating grade 12 with her died in a tragic accident on Monday. It was almost midnight and he was alone climbing on a metal bridge. He was over 100 feet when he lost his footing and fell. Now a wonderful caring young man has lost his life. He was a friend of my daughter. I am keeping closer tabs on her even if she doesn't like it.

[cabmonk]

I had no curfew, I don't know how that happened... I didn't really get into shenanigans though, so that's okay and no 'accidents'.

I had no curfew either but my mom knew I didn't hang out with idiots, she knew I really didn't go out much anyway. When I did go out late I always told her where I was gonna be. Usually it was to go to the movies where I would often watch 2 movies and sometimes be home between 1am-2am, or the one time I went to carassauga by myself and came back late. usually I would come home and she would be sitting on the couch watching sat night live anyway,lol.

As for what others have said I would agree 10pm weeknights latest and 11pm-12am weekends is good unless its a really special thing such as prom or something.

[cabmonk]

I was going to let my daughter make her own choices on the weekends about her curfew. As long as she was going to let me know were she was and let me know about what time she would be home. (in my mind nothing past 1 a.m since she was asking for a 12:00 curfew) Well after what happened this week she is back to an 11 p.m curfew on weekends 10 on weeknights. Sadly a boy that she would of been graduating grade 12 with her died in a tragic accident on Monday. It was almost midnight and he was alone climbing on a metal bridge. He was over 100 feet when he lost his footing and fell. Now a wonderful caring young man has lost his life. He was a friend of my daughter. I am keeping closer tabs on her even if she doesn't like it.

I agree thats a tragic event but nothing to stop that from happening at 7pm too or any other time, I have even been climbing on a railway bridge in Mississauga by myself at 9pm when it was dark(ok I'm almost 40 now so not anymore). We always climbed inside this high up railway bridge as kids all times of the day. I know it was stupid though and I don't know why we even did it.

[alicia]

My parents didn't impose a curfew on me because I was the book-work "good" one compared to my older brother. The general rule was to be home around 9 on weeknights and then midnight on weekends, but not strongly enforced. One thing that did enforce that for them was if we took the car - with a graduated licence you couldn't drive past midnight, so my parents just followed that line.