i know, i'm asking again for prayers and good thoughts

[Mia001]

dear SC friends, i didn't want to bother you again with my problems but

now, i must , i think

mom was rushed to the hospital monday night, her bowel (sp) movement didn.t not work and still ahd she suffered a lot

she has serum, oxigene, urine bag (?) , and a tube going up to her stomac ,

they can't see clearly on the x ray where exactly it'S blocked, it can be because her intestine is torned (?)

apparently with the draining it can relese (?) or detorn so she won't need any further procedure

but what procedure ???? she is no candidate for a surgery because of her age and health condition

will they just let her die....



and during the night , the nurse phone me because she (mom) wanted to go out of the bed by herself....she can't walk so she can't stay on her feet and she will fall if she does....so they ask me , for her security, if they need to , the permission to place her on contention.....what can i say, ????
they could give her a guard but this was not prescribed by the DR and they ask me if i could go but the nurse saw i was an hour away from there + DH was asleep and too tired + i don't drive at night

DH, who is a better son for her than i'm her daughter i think , wouldn't never ever give them the right to do so....the way he talked to me earlyer this morning....made me think that he didn't understand that i gave her the right....

situations like that just take all my energy away


sorry, just hope there is not too many spelling errors

[Mia001]

and to add cherry on the cake, yesterday morning we found out water had entered in the basement by a window

rain, rain, rain...there was 2 inches of water on almost all over the basement floor....

we were Lucky though, it was only rain water....it took 5 hours to remove all water....


can't imagine how it must be for those who have floods and some feet of water in their basement
i feel very sorry for them


what's next ?????

[Natalka]

Hoping for the best for your mom, Mia.

[Mia001]

they gave her morphin so she totally lost her mind.....she is paranoied and i'm the bad one....because i believe what the dr said, and so on.....so here we are again almost exactly as we were last year....it'S so discouraging, especially when you do everything to make her well...

[MortgageQueen]

Oh dear, poor Mia!!! I'm so sorry everything at once!!

I can tell you I went though this bowel blockage thing with my Dad (he had Parkinsons) It's the side effect of all the medications I'm afraid.

He went to hospital 3 times for this (from the nursing home) They treated him with laxatives for 3 days each the first 2 times. The 3rd time he had to be put under to remove the obstruction. (he was 79 and weak at the time) He did pull through though.

At this point in time, I will warn you this problem will probably come up again and again. I'm sorry to say that dear. . but better to be forewarned I think. You might want to have the nursing home call you if she hasn't had a bowel movement in 3 or 4 days . . .so that at least you can be prepared or even take her to hospital yourself. Much less stressful for everyone that way.

[avoncallingu]

Mia, hugs to you!

With respect to the basement, I hope you can just turn the repairs over to the insurance company to deal with! They take over and the repairs get done!


Please don't feel guilty about how you can deal with your mother's illness!

First of all, if your health is not good, you won't be able to help at all. You can't get down on yourself about things you can't really control. Be kind to yourself!

Remember- we're here to listen! Call on us any time!

[Lynn49]

Oh, my, what we all go through at one time or another with our aging parents, Mia...you're not alone, many of us here have already been through this and others will.

The thing that struck me the most from your post is how you're putting yourself down and being negative about yourself. Hon, unless you've gone through this before, how on earth can you know what the right thing to do is? You're making decisions for her out of love, out of fear of her falling and being very injured which can be very unsafe at her age. Don't put yourself down; you're a good Daughter, you worry about her, and you have your own issues to deal with. We can ONLY do our best as we know it to be and no more. Please be kinder to yourself, okay?

As for your Mom, it's so unfortunate....did you mention how old she is? I missed that bit of information. Anyway, the thing you want is for her to be calm however way they can, that she's safe, and that her bowel obstruction is dealt with in the best way possible. Like MQ said...it may be better to have professionals, doctors and surgeons treating her in the hospital instead of nursing staff. They will call for an ambulance for her if you request it, we had to do that once with my Mom for another reason, but they will do it for you. She may really need some professional intervention now.

I'll keep you in my prayers, Hon...all the best to you...and remember, you can only do your best and no more. Take good care, Mia...

[walkonby]

Will say a special prayer for both you and your Mom before I retire tonight Mia, so very sad to have to make these decisions about your Mom and her treatment when you have no idea or experience of what is going on. Take care of yourself.

[Mia001]

mom was at the hospital since last monday and today, as i wanted to talk to the surgeon, i went to the hospital early...and finally met him....mom had a pretty bad night and he said there isn't many options....

finally, mom had a surgery done by laparotomie earlyer tonight....according to the surgeon, everything went well
now , despite of all her other health problems and her age (86), we are praying for a good recovery

good night

[Mia001]

i'm affraid that she won't make it.....

[wendymac]

Oh Mia, I'm so sorry. Of course, you are in my prayers.

[LimeCake]

Hope things get better. Sending warm thoughts.