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Thread: QOTD: Tues 25 Jun: Learning it, the hard way

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    boogey-man slayer danger_dan's Avatar
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    We've all been in a situation where we think we know how to do things, and then you find out differently.
    What life lesson have you learned the hard way?
    Did someone warn you ahead of time, or was it learned all on your own?
    This thread is currently associated with: N/A
    DANGER


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    Smart Canuck alicia's Avatar
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    Keep track of your finances, save money for a rainy day, live below your means, they wouldn't give you the money if you couldn't afford it... all of those old adages. Heard them all a zillion times, but who had a maxed out LOC and credit card anyway? me... granted I realized this two years ago, so I actively paid them down. Allllllllmost done (all on a graduate students stipend no less!) By the way, who in their right mind gives a 21 year old (when I first got my card) a $15 000 limit, and a $15 000 student line of credit (with no co-signer)?!

    People can only treat you like $hit if you let them. That one I learned a bunch of different ways from a bunch of different people until I hit about 23 and realized that relationships (whether family, friends or romantic) are two way streets and I wasn't getting anything at all in return for what I was giving. So, I may seem like I have a smaller group of friends, which I do, but the ones that I have now are rock solid, and worth my time and energy. I keep trying to teach my Mom this lesson, but she feels guilty bailing on this one friend who is so selfish and is completely clueless about it. Maybe one day.

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    Mastermind Lynn49's Avatar
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    Boys will say anything, including "I love you." to get what they want (high school).
    "Ladies always keep their knees together." (from my Mom and Aunt), LOL! Somehow I never
    forgot that!

    Those were lessons I didn't have to learn the hard way, thank goodness!!

    I don't know if I learned anything 'the hard way'. Weird. I guess I've been pretty spoiled
    all my life....



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    🌙✨ Candini's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by alicia View Post
    Keep track of your finances, save money for a rainy day, live below your means, they wouldn't give you the money if you couldn't afford it... all of those old adages. Heard them all a zillion times, but who had a maxed out LOC and credit card anyway? me... granted I realized this two years ago, so I actively paid them down. Allllllllmost done (all on a graduate students stipend no less!) By the way, who in their right mind gives a 21 year old (when I first got my card) a $15 000 limit, and a $15 000 student line of credit (with no co-signer)?!

    People can only treat you like $hit if you let them. That one I learned a bunch of different ways from a bunch of different people until I hit about 23 and realized that relationships (whether family, friends or romantic) are two way streets and I wasn't getting anything at all in return for what I was giving. So, I may seem like I have a smaller group of friends, which I do, but the ones that I have now are rock solid, and worth my time and energy. I keep trying to teach my Mom this lesson, but she feels guilty bailing on this one friend who is so selfish and is completely clueless about it. Maybe one day.

    Ah yes, this over and over and over.... (Still learning my lesson.)

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    Smart Canuck Jina's Avatar
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    I always thought I'd enjoy motherhood, looking after 5 nieces from babies to 6 yrs old was awesome and I was the great and super aunt, everyone said to me I'd be a great mum. DH and I even said we'd have 3 kids. We thought, we'd try to have a boy. So I marked the calendar, check the ov dates to maximise our chance for a boy, then we had our son. He's more work than the 5 girls together! So next time we conceive, we'll leave it to chance. We love our son and have no regrets but he's hard work lol

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    Smart Canuck alicia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jina View Post
    I always thought I'd enjoy motherhood, looking after 5 nieces from babies to 6 yrs old was awesome and I was the great and super aunt, everyone said to me I'd be a great mum. DH and I even said we'd have 3 kids. We thought, we'd try to have a boy. So I marked the calendar, check the ov dates to maximise our chance for a boy, then we had our son. He's more work than the 5 girls together! So next time we conceive, we'll leave it to chance. We love our son and have no regrets but he's hard work lol
    whoa, wait... there is a way to change the odds of a given gender by a date...? I feel like a) I am either totally getting conned, or b) I know nothing about biology. LOL.

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    Un-nagged Male vesper's Avatar
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    I learned that helping a person over and over leads to dependence, which makes things worse for them. The hardest thing someone can do sometimes is to say no... and wait until they hit rock bottom and then be the first person there to embrace them in love and goodwill.
    Jina, Natalka, xox2010 and 5 others like this.

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    One Awesome Domestic Diva MrsSunshine's Avatar
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    LOL you ladies are too funny.. ya and keeping your arse in the air afterwards.. don't give you girls either

    im not even sure where to start. maybe i'll think on this one..
    Be Strong
    Be True
    Be You.
    Simple as that!

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    One Awesome Domestic Diva MrsSunshine's Avatar
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    even if it is your own flesh and blood Vesper..
    Natalka, danger_dan and vesper like this.
    Be Strong
    Be True
    Be You.
    Simple as that!

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    Un-nagged Male vesper's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lynn49 View Post
    Boys will say anything, including "I love you." to get what they want (high school).
    "Ladies always keep their knees together." (from my Mom and Aunt), LOL! Somehow I never
    forgot that!
    reminds me of my mothers advice about sex.... except she made it seem all women were the 5th horsemen of the apocalypse if I didn`t heed her warnings.
    Last edited by vesper; Tue, Jun 25th, 2013 at 04:36 PM.
    Lynn49, danger_dan and angel_2011 like this.

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    Smart Canuck Jina's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by alicia View Post
    whoa, wait... there is a way to change the odds of a given gender by a date...? I feel like a) I am either totally getting conned, or b) I know nothing about biology. LOL.
    LOL
    well if you're pretty regular and know when you're ovulating and do it in a "certain way", you can increase your chance for a boy. The boys (Y) swim faster than the girls (X)
    If you do it a few days before ovulation in a different way, then buy the time you release an egg, the Ys have died and Xs are left because they live longer, so get a girl.


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    Smart Canuck Jina's Avatar
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    I wished I tried harder when I was in high school. Always left it to the last minute to study or felt too confident. Although I had good grades, I felt I could have done so much better.

    Now I plan everything in advance and try my hardest for everything.
    xox2010, danger_dan and vesper like this.

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    Canadian Genius anisa's Avatar
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    other peoples' expectations and demands of me made me decide for myself that...

    life is short, make the most of it. ALL of it. education and money are ok, but there are so many more parts to the puzzle. if you keep tossing away pieces because they are supposedly not as important, you end up with a pretty sad looking, very incomplete puzzle that doesn't resemble anything worth admiring.
    Last edited by anisa; Tue, Jun 25th, 2013 at 07:14 PM.


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    Mastermind Lynn49's Avatar
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    It's not about the things we accumulate: it's the people.
    Now it's time I rid myself of life's excesses, one "keepsake" at a time.....I'd give it all up for my best friend not to have ALS; to have her in my life for more years would be a blessing......
    danger_dan and vesper like this.



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    Smart Canuck ninna's Avatar
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    Lesson learned: my parents were right. About everything. This includes but is not limited to:

    1. "Education is everything." (Learned this one after dropping out of university and floundering for 3 years in the "real" world trying to make it on minimum wage... and failing miserably)
    2. "Don't spend more than you make." (ah yes. Directly related to #1, above...as well as some stupid credit card decisions that I undertook in the attempt to solve problem #1)
    3. "Our door is always open." (True...but freedom...aka. getting my own apartment and making my own darned curfew rules was much more fun initially....and much more depressing in the long run because I simply had no financial sense. Gah. Should've stayed living at home till I was done university....even IF i had a 12:00 curfew at age 20. lol.)
    4. "Don't throw away your old shoes before you have new ones...especially when "shoes" actually means, "job." Well, hurray for me- this is one lesson I've abided by and it's always served me well!
    5. "Give a man a fish and feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." I've been on the fish receiving end and the fish teaching end so I can't say there are any regrets--just lessons learned.
    6. "When one door closes, another one opens." Very true. I didn't always like what the other door had in store for me, but for the most part, door #2 ended up being WAY better than door #1!!!
    7. "We will always love you no matter what." I've never "tested" this theory with regrettable actions, thank god, but I sure am lucky to have parents who loved and supported me unconditionally--even when they disagreed with some of the things I had chosen for myself.
    Jina, Lynn49, danger_dan and 2 others like this.
    "Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken." Oscar Widle

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