Horatio update: Post radiation results in

[Horndogg]

Thinking of you tonight Tara, as I start Chemo on Sept 2. Yuck. Picc line is in am I am waiting.
god bless you my friend. Take care and remember we all at Smart Canucks love you.

[Angela273]

Oh Tara, your reaction to the Chemo pill sounds absolutely horrible. I am happy to read that the new anti-nausea med worked so far. The part about the nurse with the Hello Kitty charm brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry that you are going through this again, but I am happy to read about the support that you have to help you during this battle.

[hollyquaiscer]

Tara, I'm so very happy to read that the new meds worked and that you were able to get some rest. It's wonderful who the nurses and rest of staff are making you feel at home. Of coarse nothing makes us feel better than being in our own home, but when you can't be, it always helps to have friendly faces around. I'm happy that a few foods are staying put and hopefully as the days go on you'll be able to add a few more to the list. Please know that we all have you in our thoughts and prayers.

[Natalka]

Thank you Holly. Right now I'm finding the things that are "sitting right" with me are premium plus crackers and Smart 16 bread lightly toasted. So far. AND I'm happy to report that I took my chemo pill last night with the new anti nauseant and *knock wood* it's stayed where it needs to stay and my tummy is feeling ok. I also slept a straight 10 hours! My cat woke me up or I probably would have slept longer lol

I don't think I mentioned how sweet the nurses at the Lodge are. There are 3 of them that take 8 hr shifts Mon-Fri. Day, Aft, Eve shifts. I'd say they are in their early 40's, not old enough to be my mothers, but they sure treat me like their daughter. It's rather sweet. When I was really sick on Thursday the afternoon nurse was running up to the second floor to check on me every 30 minutes, bringing me diet gingerale and checking my temperature. Well when she'd come in it seems every time I'd vomit (poor lady) lol so she'd sit on the bed and rub my back as I did. So motherly. She came in Friday morning to check on me with a gift in hand. She said to me "I felt so bad yesterday, every time I came in the room you got sick. I was out with my daughter and saw this and said I needed to pick it up for someone. I hope it makes you feel better." I opened it and it was a Hello Kitty charm to clip on to whatever. How amazingly sweet is that? We had a conversation the day before and I mentioned that I was obsessed with Hello Kitty and she goes out and buys me something to make me feel better. I can not sing their praises enough at the Lodge. They truly go above and beyond there to help the patients that stay there.

I know I make donations to the CCS but I think once I'm done with all of my treatments I will be putting the Lodge on my list of places to donate to as well. I've only been there a few days and they've already done so much for me and made me feel so at home there. A very important thing when dealing with cancer and being away from your family. Granted, I'm lucky enough to have my husband with me by my side at the Lodge too. That's a huge blessing.

I'm so glad you are doing better with the nausea. Hope that keeps working for you.

Nurses are indeed angels. Two of my sisters are nurses, both are amazing women and caregivers.

[avoncallingu]

May tomorrow be a smooth day! Hugs!

[ninna]

Keeping you in my prayers.

[IthinkIcan]

Good Luck and hugs!!

[hollyquaiscer]

[hollyquaiscer]

[TaraF]

I'm home for the long weekend....THAT I'm happy about. I just want to sleep. Sleep it all away.

I wasn't online this week due to being in bed sick or trying not to be sick this week.

So I was vomiting still. I couldn't even keep water down. It got so bad that I was not only vomiting up the anti nauseant medication I was taking but just looking at a pill I had to take would make me gag. By Wednesday I had no clue how I'd get through the week. I asked my Husband to get me some Glucerna, thinking I could get some liquid nourishment into me. It was a wonderful thought while it lasted. Anything that went in was coming right back out. I couldn't take it. If I sat up or stood up I felt like I was going to throw up, and most often I did. So I was spending 18-20 hr's a day in bed. If I wasn't at an appointment, I was in bed. My stomach was never fully settled but it felt less queasy this way. A problem to that was that my head was started to hurt because of all of the pressure I was putting on it. *sighs* Not to mention I ended up missing radiation sessions due to vomiting.


I was so ready to just pack it in. I was walking to my appointments with my "barf bucket" in hand, I literally looked like the walking dead and I felt even worse. I know the Chemo is kicking my ass, severely. And so I really want to stop that portion of the treatment, but I have been chasing that Dr down to speak to him to have my questions addressed to see if we can work on it or whether I'm just ending it. I saw my Oncologist yesterday for an assessment and he sent me right over to the E.R. I spent 10 hrs there to be told I was severely dehydrated and get several litres of IV pumped into me, including some amazing anti nauseant. I left with a few prescriptions and back to see my Oncologist today. Though I gotta say, having all of that liquid in my body has allowed me to feel a lot better. I feel like I can actually function today for the first time in over a week. AND I actually had real food and it stayed where it's suppose to!


So I show up to my radiation appointment and they asked if I took my Temodal. "No. I'm not taking anymore Chemotherapy until I have a face to face with Dr. Torres". I was told that I needed permission from my Radiation Oncologist that I could have my radiation without having taken my chemo before they'd do it. Ummm are you serious? lol I don't want to take the chemo and you're telling me I need a Dr's note to go ahead with the other portion of the treatment? Whatever. So I went to that clinic earlier today and spoke to my Oncologist and he's cool with it. He knows where I'm sitting with everything, how my experience has been so incredibly horrible, and how I want some solid answers from the other Dr before another ounce of poison goes into my body.


My nurse was pleasantly surprised that I've only lost 6 lbs in the last 9 days considering I've been vomiting so much. Um yay me? lol

[Shwa Girl]

I saw my Oncologist yesterday for an assessment and he sent me right over to the E.R. I spent 10 hrs there to be told I was severely dehydrated and get several litres of IV pumped into me, including some amazing anti nauseant.

glad to hear that you are back rehydrated and you can eat.
nice to know you got the good drugs - good doctors and good meds -- make all the difference, eh?

[Lynn49]

Yay you, indeed, Sweetheart...you know we all want what's best for you and for you to use every means at your disposal to get well...I'm not certain as to whether you're taking your chemo now, or has it stalled until you can talk with Dr Torres? Does that mean that you're not waging the war you're supposed to be waging right now? I mean...hell..I hear what that chemo is doing to you, but I'm also scared that you need it, yet....look what it's doing to you?! When might you meet with Torres?

Honey, you're one bright cookie, and I know you're going to do the best you can and fight your way all the way through this until you're back on your feet again. I'm proud of you for asking questions and demanding answers until you're satisfied that what you're being asked to do is the best course of action for you. I pray you continue to feel relief from the nausea, and that he has answers for you that will alleviate the stresses that chemo is putting on your body.

Bless you, little one...may Angels be with you every minute of the day and may you feel our arms around you always! We're cheering for you, Tara...and we know you'll get through this! We only hope you get through this more comfortably.

Gentle hugs, Lynn

[avoncallingu]

Tara, I'm so sorry that you're having to go through such "hell" to get back to health! Do they have any counsellors who can talk with you about the emotional toll that this must be having on you and your dh? Hoping that this weekend can be a relaxing one for you. There are gladiolas for sale and that always tells me that the lovely days of fall will soon be here, with the beautiful colours and "snuggly" temps. When I walk the dogs, I hear the crickets and up above the geese are gathering in V's. I LOVE this time of year. I hope that it brings you better times. Your courage just stands as a beacon for all of us. My best wishes to you and please know that I think of you each day.

[walkonby]

Tara, I am so happy that you are home for the long w/e. So very lucky that they gave you the IV ( fluids) when they did, the weakness must have been so draining for you. Whatever madness awaits you in the hospital and with the treatment just use these 3 days for you and your DH now. Whatever form of pleasant relaxation you can enjoy, grab hold of it. Oh it is really tough to read what you have had to endure, I just think of how many others are doing the same and feeling every bit as lousy as you do. Thank you for taking the time to let us know how things are going. All the best for next week.

[hollyquaiscer]

Tara, when your sick after treatment, I don't understand why the nurses, staff or Dr's didn't give you IV fluids at the lodge, it should almost be part of your regime. They shouldn't watch you suffer like that, as they all know that every time you get sick, you loose fluid, the less fluid you have, the sicker you get. It just doesn't make sense. I'm glad you're now waiting to see Dr. Torres. I've found that we have to be proactive and ask all the questions, and almost TELL THEM, what we want or need done! As you know, the Dr. will tell you that the best efforts are hitting the cancer with all you've got, which means both treatments together. But, having said that, if you can't to it, I know that in some cases they have done radiation first, then finished up with rounds of chemo after. Not sure if it's as effective that way, but if it's not working doing both together, they don't have much choice, rely.

Honey, I pray for you every single day. Stay strong, no matter how down you get, please remember that we're all here pulling for you...We luv you hun and we've got your back...ALWAYS