Another Cheap Laugh Thread

[Natalka]

<small>10 Things That Sound Dirty On Halloween, But Aren't...</small>

<small>1. So...What'd you get in the sack?

2. Once you get under the sheet, start moaning and groaning!!!

3. Just hop on that broomstick and ride it!

4. Those small suckers are gone in a few licks!

5. I got the best piece from that house.

6. Quit screwing around on the porch!!!

7. Stick your hand in and guess what you're feeling....

8. It was so filled and heavy, I had to use TWO hands!!

9. They'll suck you dry if they get their teeth in you.

10. I bobbed and bobbed, but couldn't get my mouth around it!</small>

[heartgirl99]

'Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.' -Elbert Hubbard

[improperganda]

Hahaha I love this thread!! its so funny
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Here's the guide to calorie-burning activities and the number of calories per hour they consume.

Beating around the bush . . . . . . . . .75
Jumping to conclusions . . . . . . . . . 100
Climbing the walls . . . . . . . . . . . 150
Swallowing your pride. . . . . . . . . .50
Passing the buck . . . . . . . . . . . .25
Pushing your luck. . . . . . . . . . . 250
Making mountains out of molehills. . . 500
Hitting the nail on the head . . . . . .50
Bending over backwards . . . . . . . . .75
Running around in circles. . . . . . . 350
Climbing the ladder of success . . . . 650

[Patty Smyth]

Canadian Eh?

[heartgirl99]

My husband and I divorced over religious differences.
He thought he was God, and I didn't.

[heartgirl99]

The woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed way too qualified for the job.
"Look Miss," said the foreman, "have you any actual experience in picking lemons?"
"Well, as a matter if fact, yes!" she replied.? "I've been divorced three times."

[heartgirl99]

Reason Why It's So Hard To Solve A Redneck Murder:------
All the DNA is the same.

[heartgirl99]

I was in the express lane at the store quietly fuming.
Completely ignoring the "MAXIMUM 10 ITEMS" sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward looked into the cart and asked sweetly, "So which 10 items would you like to buy?"
Wouldn't it be great if that happened more often?

[VeeVee]

[Lynn49]

I was in the express lane at the store quietly fuming.
Completely ignoring the "MAXIMUM 10 ITEMS" sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward looked into the cart and asked sweetly, "So which 10 items would you like to buy?"
Wouldn't it be great if that happened more often?

LOLOLOLOL!!! We WISH!!!

[NancyM]

[Patty Smyth]

Joke of the Year<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
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Two women were sitting together, quietly .<o:p></o:p>
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[Patty Smyth]

.

[Natalka]

Joke of the Year<o:p></o:p>
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Two women were sitting together, quietly .<o:p></o:p>
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Well, that wins first prize!

[mydusty]

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